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What Person Would You Say Impacted Your Life More Than Anyone

rhinefire

rhinefire

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My dad was somewhat laid back advisor telling me I could listen to him and if not, then I would learn on my own. I took that attitude in to my life perhaps more than any other in that if someone does not go along with my ideas then fine. I find it humorous when people insist they are right on the smallest, most insignificant topics.

Outside my family members, my sophomore western civilization teacher Ms. Payne taught me to respect others. This was in 1964, she was black despite the social upheaval in those days she held all people at the same level and insisted her students do the same. I truly loved that teacher. She addressed all her students as Mr. or Miss. Very cool lady.
 
Both my second grade and fifth grade teachers.

They taught me, among other things, compassion, understanding of human differences, and Do Unto Others.....
 
My father - he said that if you spend all of your money on the things that you want then you will have none left for the things that you need.
 
rhinefire said:
My dad was somewhat laid back advisor telling me I could listen to him and if not, then I would learn on my own. I took that attitude in to my life perhaps more than any other in that if someone does not go along with my ideas then fine. I find it humorous when people insist they are right on the smallest, most insignificant topics.

Outside my family members, my sophomore western civilization teacher Ms. Payne taught me to respect others. This was in 1964, she was black despite the social upheaval in those days she held all people at the same level and insisted her students do the same. I truly loved that teacher. She addressed all her students as Mr. or Miss. Very cool lady.
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My father had the greatest over all influence on me. But a teacher in grade nine history by the name of Swanchec changed my life. He taught me how to learn instead of just read by assigning me a biography of Mahatma Gandhi. From there I grew.

Another was my hockey coach who showed me my talents and limitations and how to play them, The confidence I already had as a strong skater turned into a rather good play maker and defenseman, which gave me confidence in everything else.
 
Marx. He was absolutely brilliant.


When he said he wouldn't join any group that would have him for a member, he captured my state of mind so perfectly that little else anybody has said since seems to really matter.

Why is this thread in the dating section, though? I suppose if I had to stay relevent,I would say I wouldn't join any group sex that would have me for my member.
 
My parents as I was born

Beyond that, I tend to be independently minded.
 
i would say my best friend Tim. we have known each other for over 40 years and have been good friends for nearly 35 years.
 
rhinefire said:
My dad was somewhat laid back advisor telling me I could listen to him and if not, then I would learn on my own. I took that attitude in to my life perhaps more than any other in that if someone does not go along with my ideas then fine. I find it humorous when people insist they are right on the smallest, most insignificant topics.

Outside my family members, my sophomore western civilization teacher Ms. Payne taught me to respect others. This was in 1964, she was black despite the social upheaval in those days she held all people at the same level and insisted her students do the same. I truly loved that teacher. She addressed all her students as Mr. or Miss. Very cool lady.
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Seriously, y'all will find this an unpleasant answer, but... the man who sexually participated with me when I was about 11yo. I won't say sexual abuse because there was no abuse, he never laid a harmful hand on me. He was a friend of the family, a psuedo-uncle like many of us had. My home life wasn't good, my mother hated me and was determined to assure I had the absolute worse opinion of myself, my looks, my personality, everything. This "uncle" thought I was beautiful, he was always telling me that my mother was wrong, jealous, and to learn to ignore her constant demeaning and badgering. He was the first person to really do everything he could to boost my esteem.

The only draw back, possibly, was that I was very promiscuous in my early days, having learned that men wanting sex were usually nice and complimentary. Well that and I hated sleeping alone and men will usually stay overnight after sex, but that fear sleeping was due to my father pulling me out of bed at all hours and beating the crap out me. So even the promiscuity can't all be blamed on "uncle." And in the end, I well survived my promiscuity without pregnancy or disease, and with so many saying I was (fill in a compliment here), it did wonders to overcome much of the garbage my mother had me believing about myself.
 
Impacted my life?

I can't think of anything nice to say. I think I hate everyone. LOL
 
What Person Would You Say Impacted Your Life More Than Anyone
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my parents, for sure. others have had big impacts, too, but my parents set me on the road, gave me a map, and occasionally picked me up when there was a bad storm.
 
rhinefire said:
My dad was somewhat laid back advisor telling me I could listen to him and if not, then I would learn on my own. I took that attitude in to my life perhaps more than any other in that if someone does not go along with my ideas then fine. I find it humorous when people insist they are right on the smallest, most insignificant topics.

Outside my family members, my sophomore western civilization teacher Ms. Payne taught me to respect others. This was in 1964, she was black despite the social upheaval in those days she held all people at the same level and insisted her students do the same. I truly loved that teacher. She addressed all her students as Mr. or Miss. Very cool lady.
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Dad taught me that life wasn't fair.
Mom taught me to work hard and, as my biggest fan, gave me self-confidence.
My brother-in-law taught me that, if a problem can be solved with money? You don't have much of a problem.

I could go on and on. I pity those people who don't listen and, more importantly, don't take in the wisdom that's all around us. We are a culmination of what we learn from others. Some people are smart enough to listen. Others only shut-up reluctantly and wait for the next opportunity to speak.
 
Aunt Spiker said:
Well I was going to say 'my parents' - but then I realized that they've **** on my life more than once.
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My mother hated everyone and everything, so I'm wondering if you're that @&^#%$&!
 
Both my parents, God rest their souls.

My parents were true martyrs to their family. They never had anything for themselves until they had satisfied the needs of myself and my four, then three brothers. My father worked two jobs yet had $10 in his wallet at the beginning of each week and never spent more and never asked for more. My mother was a stay at home mom until we were older and she catered to myself and my brothers all the time. It was not uncommon for her to cook several different meals for dinner because we each had different schedules and liked different foods, but she insisted on pot roast on Sundays, and everyone had to be there.

The one story I can tell as an example of their selfless approach to parenting was a time in my last year of high school when I had a Halloween party. We had a cream coloured rug in the family room, where the party was, and I'd decorated the room with orange and black streamers and other stuff. The party lasted until about 2am - an ambulance was called because one young lady claimed to have alcohol poisoning, but she was just over dramatic. After everyone left, my parents told me to go to bed and get some sleep - I was a little out of it, I guess. When I woke up later that day, they'd cleaned everything up and tore up the carpeting because it had been ruined with black and orange dye from the streamers and spilled drinks. They weren't mad at all and said that the party seemed to be a great success. It was a right of passage to have a high school bash and they were glad to be able to accommodate it.

They taught me the power of giving of yourself and realizing accomplishment from what you could do for others rather than what others could do for you. I've lived that way all my life, or at least tried my best. And I did everything I could when each of them was in their last years and dying to ensure they were comfortable, in their own home, and waited on in the manner they taught me by example.
 
It's a three way tie.

My Scoutmaster, my high school wrestling coach, and my first Platoon Sargent.
 
My Mom, I think. She taught me how not to act, and how not to treat people, and how not to raise your children. I am a better person, because I do not act like she did.

I love her, but she kind of messed me up a little, and it's taken me years to get past it.
 
CanadaJohn said:
Both my parents, God rest their souls.

My parents were true martyrs to their family. They never had anything for themselves until they had satisfied the needs of myself and my four, then three brothers. My father worked two jobs yet had $10 in his wallet at the beginning of each week and never spent more and never asked for more. My mother was a stay at home mom until we were older and she catered to myself and my brothers all the time. It was not uncommon for her to cook several different meals for dinner because we each had different schedules and liked different foods, but she insisted on pot roast on Sundays, and everyone had to be there.

The one story I can tell as an example of their selfless approach to parenting was a time in my last year of high school when I had a Halloween party. We had a cream coloured rug in the family room, where the party was, and I'd decorated the room with orange and black streamers and other stuff. The party lasted until about 2am - an ambulance was called because one young lady claimed to have alcohol poisoning, but she was just over dramatic. After everyone left, my parents told me to go to bed and get some sleep - I was a little out of it, I guess. When I woke up later that day, they'd cleaned everything up and tore up the carpeting because it had been ruined with black and orange dye from the streamers and spilled drinks. They weren't mad at all and said that the party seemed to be a great success. It was a right of passage to have a high school bash and they were glad to be able to accommodate it.

They taught me the power of giving of yourself and realizing accomplishment from what you could do for others rather than what others could do for you. I've lived that way all my life, or at least tried my best. And I did everything I could when each of them was in their last years and dying to ensure they were comfortable, in their own home, and waited on in the manner they taught me by example.
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What a great story and great parents! :thumbs: They could have yelled about the ruined carpet; they could have called your friends thoughtless jerks; and so on - but they didn't. They didn't blame you, which was very kindly done. You had a successful party as far as they were concerned, and that was their goal, to give you that memory. Kudos!

I was a cheerleader for High School football in my Junior and Senior years, and my parents let me have a party every Friday night after the game - back then it was only cider, donuts, and lots of sandwiches, but everyone was invited, and there was always a crowd. My parents were smart - by having the party at my house, they knew where I was, and what I was doing! I didn't realize that until much later, though - I just figured they were great parents, which they were! When my parties was over, the guys would leave to celebrate the games by drinking lots of beer elsewhere, but at least they had been fed at my house, and I don't recall anyone getting stopped for DUIs back then. Fun times! P.S. I never drank a beer till I went to college! :sigh:
 
Summerwind said:
Seriously, y'all will find this an unpleasant answer, but... the man who sexually participated with me when I was about 11yo. I won't say sexual abuse because there was no abuse, he never laid a harmful hand on me. He was a friend of the family, a psuedo-uncle like many of us had. My home life wasn't good, my mother hated me and was determined to assure I had the absolute worse opinion of myself, my looks, my personality, everything. This "uncle" thought I was beautiful, he was always telling me that my mother was wrong, jealous, and to learn to ignore her constant demeaning and badgering. He was the first person to really do everything he could to boost my esteem.

The only draw back, possibly, was that I was very promiscuous in my early days, having learned that men wanting sex were usually nice and complimentary. Well that and I hated sleeping alone and men will usually stay overnight after sex, but that fear sleeping was due to my father pulling me out of bed at all hours and beating the crap out me. So even the promiscuity can't all be blamed on "uncle." And in the end, I well survived my promiscuity without pregnancy or disease, and with so many saying I was (fill in a compliment here), it did wonders to overcome much of the garbage my mother had me believing about myself.
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It's unfortunate that you see it as a positive experience when in reality a man took advantage of your emotional state when you were a child in order to just have sex with you.

He saw your weakness and exploited it purely for sex.

He could have been supportive and reassuring without turning it sexual. Many people in life can give support without involving sexual feelings or behaviors in anything that they say or do. It sounds like your pseudo uncle was a highly successful pedophile who manipulated you so thoroughly you still don't see that you were abused and mistreated.
 
polgara said:
What a great story and great parents! :thumbs: They could have yelled about the ruined carpet; they could have called your friends thoughtless jerks; and so on - but they didn't. They didn't blame you, which was very kindly done. You had a successful party as far as they were concerned, and that was their goal, to give you that memory. Kudos!

I was a cheerleader for High School football in my Junior and Senior years, and my parents let me have a party every Friday night after the game - back then it was only cider, donuts, and lots of sandwiches, but everyone was invited, and there was always a crowd. My parents were smart - by having the party at my house, they knew where I was, and what I was doing! I didn't realize that until much later, though - I just figured they were great parents, which they were! When my parties was over, the guys would leave to celebrate the games by drinking lots of beer elsewhere, but at least they had been fed at my house, and I don't recall anyone getting stopped for DUIs back then. Fun times! P.S. I never drank a beer till I went to college! :sigh:
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The really good parents are tricky that way - they get you to do things they want you to do and they make it seem like it was your idea and a great one too! Drinking is/was different in Canada and the US - here, the drinking age was 18 and then moved to 19 and I think most states have always been around 21, so drinking at home for young adults is more acceptable here I guess, although our 17yr olds are like your 20yr olds.
 
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