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First Date

I never go into anything expecting someone to pay my way.

I'm a fan of "casual bills." Whoever offers picks it up. Or whoever is currently more flush. Dutch is a hassle, dealing with someone who insists on paying or not paying is a hassle. It's just a bill.
 
I never go into anything expecting someone to pay my way.

I'm a fan of "casual bills." Whoever offers picks it up. Or whoever is currently more flush. Dutch is a hassle, dealing with someone who insists on paying or not paying is a hassle. It's just a bill.

On the first date He should pay, PERIOD. Especially if He asked her out. After that, whatever arrangement works for the couple is fine with me. More often than not, I will expect to pay for the evening's activities when I go out with a woman.
 
A date with prospects, and potentially long-term material? OK.

If just meeting someone cold, maybe something informal. But as Tigger points out, it's not all that informal if it's a date. Although as long as it's not fast food, I wouldn't be too worried. Best dates I had, I analyzed many years later, were something like this:

1. Dinner (or other event)
Dinner gives you both something to partially focus on while getting through the early introductions and awkwardness.
You can do any event here, but doing something that gives you at last some conversation is ideal, otherwise you're essentially postponing your date. For example, if you went to an art museum, or an aquarium (whatever), you get to talk, but you have something else you're doing. A movie is not a great choice for early dates IMO. Don't go ultra-expensive unless that's the norm for you either.

2. New location to have coffee or drinks or dessert
Now you're almost all conversation and the car ride and change of scenery is better than just hanging out at the same dinner spot.
Here is where you should be picking up if there will be a second date if not before. Although if dinner went terribly, you could always conclude before this. Notice if you're into one another, you're basically on a second date compared to that poor chap that only did "coffee" as a first date ;)

3. Conclude if going well, with somehwere semi-private with nothing but the two of you. That could be a beach walk, or something more simple like hanging out at the courtyard of your apartment (if it's not an eyesore), or at worst just talking in the parking lot/driveway at her place. Ideally you may end up holding each other and do some kissing. Save the groping for the second date. Unless this was a booty-date, and you wouldn't be asking where to take people....
 
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On the first date He should pay, PERIOD. Especially if He asked her out. After that, whatever arrangement works for the couple is fine with me. More often than not, I will expect to pay for the evening's activities when I go out with a woman.

Why?

I suppose it's sort of moot to me. Formal dates that cost money worth considering are not something I like doing. So it doesn't really come up.
 
Tradition and proper etiquette if nothing else.

The former is the reason for the latter, but what's the reason for tradition? Why is it automatically correct or legitimate?
 
Nomad has the right idea for sure. I mean, I usually pay for a first "date", but for me a first date is usually coffee or something cheap and innocuous. Going all-out for the first date can create a lot of tension and cause (either justly or unjustly) large expectations on both sides. At least with coffee, you sit down and are able to carry great conversation with absolutely no worry about anything that a large bill entails.
 
I take a lady to the best restaurant in town... my kitchen.
 
What is your ideal first date? Also, if you could include first date ideas for a law student on a budget that would be terrific. I don't have any upcoming first dates, but it never hurts to be prepared!
1) Chase each other naked through rush hour traffic.
2) Spend hours tickling the small of her back with the business end of a lightsabre.
3) Throw her mother into a pit of starving wolves.
4) Throw her off the Empire State Building, run down all the stairs really fast, and catch her before she hits the pavement.
5) Steal a Lamborghini, and frame her for the crime.
6) Cook her a meal, and lace it with laxatives.
7) Spray her in the face with mustard gas, whilst repeatedly screaming the phrase 'West Siiiiide!'.
8) Tie her up on a busy street, then build a house of cards around her.
9) Punch a cop as he walks past, then say 'What the f*** did you do that for, you crazy b****?'.
10) Grab her glasses and jewellery, and eat them in front of her.

Trust me dude, you do these things, and you'll never want for female company again.
 
nothing, i'm married. ;-)

In that case, I'd pay for you

And I didn't say that I never pay. It's just more often than not, I can get the lady to offer to payand I don't have to ask her to do so
 
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Bag means get or have regarding a partner that you love, nothing about nailing a chick or anything as belittling.

My "stretch " is because I was married for almost ten years and now I am a single father to my children... :2roll:

I don't want to "get" or "have" a woman either. I like intimate relationships with independent women.
 
The former is the reason for the latter, but what's the reason for tradition? Why is it automatically correct or legitimate?

It's a means of beginning to prove that He knows His responsibilities and is capable of supporting her.
 
He'd be happy knowing Spanish, one that assigns gender to everything. Lots of maleness to emphasize.

I see no use whatsoever in learning any language other than English; regardless of how it works.
 
Your Star said:
Because men are supposed to be dominant, or some silly **** like that.

Yah I've seen that kind of silly before. I know a girl who spelled "women" with a Y for some stupid feminist bullcrap reason I'll never truly understand.

Odd thing is that she was interested in me. Of course, it could be a ruse to drag me back to her Amazonian hyper-lesbian tribe and sacrifice me to the Goddess of Man-Hate.
 
Yah I've seen that kind of silly before. I know a girl who spelled "women" with a Y for some stupid feminist bullcrap reason I'll never truly understand.

Odd thing is that she was interested in me. Of course, it could be a ruse to drag me back to her Amazonian hyper-lesbian tribe and sacrifice me to the Goddess of Man-Hate.

It's a simple question, reduced to a letter for the pictography inclined. A basic entry hello kind of wtf do u know. You don't have a clue, and you're surprised the relationship (if we might consider her brief encounter at the zoo as such) remains a mystery.

:)
 
It's a simple question, reduced to a letter for the pictography inclined. A basic entry hello kind of wtf do u know. You don't have a clue, and you're surprised the relationship (if we might consider her brief encounter at the zoo as such) remains a mystery.

:)

It's posts like this that make me regret losing my Gibberish-> English dictionary
 
Yah I've seen that kind of silly before. I know a girl who spelled "women" with a Y for some stupid feminist bullcrap reason I'll never truly understand.

Yeah, I've encountered them before, quite idiotic.
 
A tiny bit of self awareness and one might discern both what she was inquiring (not that you'd have listened) and the answers to the conundrum. Yeah, sangha, it's like dolphins... takes a real genius to see what was happening.
 
A tiny bit of self awareness and one might discern both what she was inquiring (not that you'd have listened) and the answers to the conundrum. Yeah, sangha, it's like dolphins... takes a real genius to see what was happening.

I put that into the gibberish translator, and all I got was
A tinupp fit eb sorb axawaxalonopt pi eno vidd iscoln feth haxat sko waxas dinquilick (jet zaxat ug'd whaxavo richonow) pi zo axanswols te zo cenuctlum. Yoaxah, saxackhaxa, dit nud riko perphins... taxakos pit loaxar konius te soo haxat waxas whaxapponick

I think I may have broke it
Gibberish Translator
 
Like a whale falling to the earth.
 
Yah I've seen that kind of silly before. I know a girl who spelled "women" with a Y for some stupid feminist bullcrap reason I'll never truly understand.

I've been known to spell "woman" any of three ways at times, though never with a "y".....

"woman" for general use and as a descriptor of proper, traditional women.

"woMan" for the feminists who see themselves as being the same as Men.

"Woman" for the female supremicists who believe they are better than Men.
 
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