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DNR's. In Illinois, two are required. Most people don't know that. And the consequences of not knowing can be considerable. Maybe your state requires two as well.
- A Standard Healthcare Power of Attorney for family to present at the hospital.
- A special DNR order to present to paramedics when 911 is called.
Without that second one, if a loved one's heart stops beating, the paramedics will ALWAYS attempt resuscitation, no matter what you say to them as their HCPOA. It is signed by the person (or their spokesperson) and by that person's doctor.
I was interviewing a company that provides private companionship (and other services) for seniors in their home. The company representative asked me if I had that special DNR order on my mom. Right in front of her. I was flabbergasted.
I guess she couldn't know that mom has dementia and that I've taken over her healthcare decisions, but I would have expected that question to be asked privately. My answer to her was that she didn't need that information, and she could clearly see I was uncomfortable. The whole thing went right over mom's lil' head.
What are your thoughts? Should she have asked me privately?
Hi Maggie - from my perspective, the representative was in effect asking your mom the question through you - if she didn't know that you have power of attorney and other authority over your mom's care, she would be negligent asking you and not asking her and getting the answer from her.
I never had power of attorney for my mom, but here and with my mom's condition, every healthcare and homecare representative I ever came into contact with took my word as the final word for any medical or personal treatment or non-treatment. Even in hospitals, whatever I said was taken as the final word. Every time my mom was in hospital, they had me fill out a form related to the extent to which the hospital would resuscitate her in various scenarios. The day my mom died, in hospital, the doctor told me how she was and her chances of surviving and indicated that if she started to die they could resuscitate her but it could cause her great discomfort, broken bones, etc. and I simply told the doctor that she had lived a long life and at 96 I didn't want her to be brutalized in order to keep her alive a few minutes/hours/days longer and we should just let her pass in peace - and she did, overnight, and I've never regretted how it ended.
Perhaps in the US things would be much different with all the lawsuits filed against hospitals and healthcare professionals, but I had a fairly lengthy history with the hospital for my dad and then my mom so it was never a problem and they knew they could trust me.