Need advice from parents

[Muhammed]

Because I am not ready for my 15 year old daughter to get layed (sic) and ruin her life. I want her to have a future - not a baby at 15.

Ever hear of contraception?

 

[Alyssa]

It's becoming much older these days. It used to be we moved out when we were ready to start our adult lives. These days 17-18 year olds are less able to do so and seem to enjoy languishing in mom and dad's basement waiting for their fortunes to fall in to their well deserving laps. I moved out of my parents' home at 17, had a full time job while I finished my last year of high school. I know people now in their mid 20s who still rely on their parents for health insurance and their cell phone plans.

well look at you. I plan to tell my kids i walked in three feet of snow to school before sunrise every day.

My father made it quite clear that home was not going to be a rent free, or no rules environment after HS graduation. When I moved out, at age 18, he moved the family 1,500 miles away. When my younger brothers graduated HS and moved out he moved himself and my mother another 310 miles away. Independence must be encouraged, expected and enforced not simply seen as an option.

The deal for me was i could live at home rent free until i graduated high school. At that point, I was required to pay rent. I figured hell with that, I'm moving out. Hated dorm life. Later, it was a house full of roommates which also sucked balls. My little sis, on the other hand, lives in luxury with the newest clothes, phone, whatever the **** she wants..

I've got an idea, why don't you quit playing cockblocker and just let her get layed?

^ this coming from the guy who wants to know whether or not it's ok to **** his half sister. :roll:

 

[MaggieD]

The thug just called the "friend's" phone, looking for my daughter. She told him to contact my Husband through facebook. If he truly wants to talk to her, he'll contact my husband. I think it's awfully suspect that he and I have both messaged him and he ignored us, but tries to contact her through the "friend."

I like that you've done this. And that's the message to pass to your daughter as well -- that if he has good intentions and wants to talk to her, he needs to come through her father. I even think that's fair. Good job.

 

[tessaesque]

She has his facebook info because when my daughter was being sneaky over there, she started up a new secret facebook account that we didn't know about, and used it on the "friend's" phone. The "friend" is 30.

Yeah, my daughter wouldn't be allowed over there anymore.

 

[Superfly]

Wait...the friend is 30? How old is her kid?

She has a special needs daughter that is 10, and a 6 year old and a 2 year old.

 

[Superfly]

Yeah, my daughter wouldn't be allowed over there anymore.

She's not. I told my Husband today that this woman really isn't our friend. I told him before I was finished with her, but he felt like maybe I was overreacting. That's the main reason I started this thread - wanted to know if I was overreacting.

He now agrees with me.

 

[Gipper]

She has a special needs daughter that is 10, and a 6 year old and a 2 year old.

Sounds like the daughter isn't the only one with "special needs".

 

[Superfly]

Sounds like the daughter isn't the only one with "special needs".

Yeah I agree, Gip.

 

[lizzie]

She's not. I told my Husband today that this woman really isn't our friend. I told him before I was finished with her, but he felt like maybe I was overreacting. That's the main reason I started this thread - wanted to know if I was overreacting.

He now agrees with me.

I will tell you one of the reasons I am so adamant about this issue. My ex-mother-in-law had a daughter, who at 14 years of age, decided she was in "love" with a young man about three years older than she, who was from a "troubled" home. Ma-in-law let this young man move in with them. Now understand, ma-in-law claimed to be such a fine Christian woman, and I don't know if she was just that stupid, or in denial that her daughter would sleep with this guy. Anyway, the little gal ended up having two abortions before she was 16 years of age, the young man dumped her (surprise), and she ended up getting hooked up with a wild crazy white trash drug user, married and had two kids, then divorced and remarried, to a guy who's not any better, and her entire life has been a string of disasters and drug partying, and two unfortunate children have grown up under her influence. I'd rather be a little too hard on a child, than to coddle their poor decisions.

 

[Alyssa]

Some sort of combination between public humiliation and birth control is the best option imo.

 

[Superfly]

I will tell you one of the reasons I am so adamant about this issue. My ex-mother-in-law had a daughter, who at 14 years of age, decided she was in "love" with a young man about three years older than she, who was from a "troubled" home. Ma-in-law let this young man move in with them. Now understand, ma-in-law claimed to be such a fine Christian woman, and I don't know if she was just that stupid, or in denial that her daughter would sleep with this guy. Anyway, the little gal ended up having two abortions before she was 16 years of age, the young man dumped her (surprise), and she ended up getting hooked up with a wild crazy white trash drug user, married and had two kids, then divorced and remarried, to a guy who's not any better, and her entire life has been a string of disasters and drug partying, and two unfortunate children have grown up under her influence. I'd rather be a little too hard on a child, than to coddle their poor decisions.

Amen. Besides, if we are not here to help guide our children into making the right decisions, what are we here for? Is that one of the main parts of being a parent? Guidance??

 

[SmokeAndMirrors]

It's becoming much older these days. It used to be we moved out when we were ready to start our adult lives. These days 17-18 year olds are less able to do so and seem to enjoy languishing in mom and dad's basement waiting for their fortunes to fall in to their well deserving laps. I moved out of my parents' home at 17, had a full time job while I finished my last year of high school. I know people now in their mid 20s who still rely on their parents for health insurance and their cell phone plans.

This is a completely BS representation of what's happening with the younger generations.

The majority of them are in so much debt that despite working 50-60 hours a week, they still can't afford a place to live. Said debt is not due to poor planning; it's due to tuition doubling or more over the course of their time in college while grant amounts continue to fall, and the fact they'd be in just as much debt but with no hope of ever getting out of it if they don't just keep going and finish.

Also, a lot of entry level jobs no longer offer insurance; it's too expensive, and the plans they offer to young people are as good as worthless even if you can get them.

I'd say I know just as many parents who won't let their adult children become self-sufficient enough to move out, as I do children who are just too lazy to do so. Which is to say, not many.