I don't appreciate it

[Aunt Spiker]

Not at all - the constant derision and offensive tongue that's lashed out at males in general by countless females who think they know everything about the male of the species.

I am the mother of three boys - and I feel wretched knowing that they're doomed before they start to grow into men by the malicious, snide and immature presumptions and false beliefs held by a large number of women who cast them about without thought or hesitation.

I hope my boys find DECENT women who admire them, find them respect worthy and who don't just assume they're all about raging hormones and have a mental capacity as that of a 15 year old forever. . . because even now I can tell they will be well rounded, respectful adults and I hope that others see that later on in life - and even now.

And some women complain that men are pigs. :roll: Takes one to know one, apparently.

 

[TheLastIndependent]

Not at all - the constant derision and offensive tongue that's lashed out at males in general by countless females who think they know everything about the male of the species.

I am the mother of three boys - and I feel wretched knowing that they're doomed before they start to grow into men by the malicious, snide and immature presumptions and false beliefs held by a large number of women who cast them about without thought or hesitation.

I hope my boys find DECENT women who admire them, find them respect worthy and who don't just assume they're all about raging hormones and have a mental capacity as that of a 15 year old forever. . . because even now I can tell they will be well rounded, respectful adults and I hope that others see that later on in life - and even now.

And some women complain that men are pigs. :roll: Takes one to know one, apparently.

I understand that pain. I've been written off as "every other guy" many times. I mean, I write poetry, how much of a douche can I be? :lol:

 

[Your Star]

Is this why you have what looks like 2 women making out as your avatar

Also these kind of assumptions are made about women as well, bonus perk of being gay is not having potential partners judge you by your gender.

 

[Goshin]

Not at all - the constant derision and offensive tongue that's lashed out at males in general by countless females who think they know everything about the male of the species.

I am the mother of three boys - and I feel wretched knowing that they're doomed before they start to grow into men by the malicious, snide and immature presumptions and false beliefs held by a large number of women who cast them about without thought or hesitation.

I hope my boys find DECENT women who admire them, find them respect worthy and who don't just assume they're all about raging hormones and have a mental capacity as that of a 15 year old forever. . . because even now I can tell they will be well rounded, respectful adults and I hope that others see that later on in life - and even now.

And some women complain that men are pigs. :roll: Takes one to know one, apparently.

Thank you for that. Some of us do get kinda tired of being characterized that way.

 

[Paschendale]

I get kind of tired of hearing that men are simple and uncomplicated. Like we're nothing more than input > output machines. I don't think anybody is simple.

 

[ThePlayDrive]

Not at all - the constant derision and offensive tongue that's lashed out at males in general by countless females who think they know everything about the male of the species.

I am the mother of three boys - and I feel wretched knowing that they're doomed before they start to grow into men by the malicious, snide and immature presumptions and false beliefs held by a large number of women who cast them about without thought or hesitation.

I hope my boys find DECENT women who admire them, find them respect worthy and who don't just assume they're all about raging hormones and have a mental capacity as that of a 15 year old forever. . . because even now I can tell they will be well rounded, respectful adults and I hope that others see that later on in life - and even now.

And some women complain that men are pigs. :roll: Takes one to know one, apparently.

I doubt that your sons are "doomed." Out of all the groups in this country that are stereotyped, men are one of the least negatively affected by those stereotypes (statistically).

 

[Gipper]

God, I love spikey.

All in all, I wouldn't worry about the boys. Usually the women who hold the beliefs you talk about...let's just say they get what they deserve. They either end up alone, screwed over by guys that are sick of their crap, or settle down and live in the personal hell they created by their views.

It's the cosmic balance.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

Do they, though? However nice that idea sounds - I know more females who appear to loath males and they're quite married - even happily so. I think women are like that in greater numbers than are men who dislike or disapprove of women.

Not only do boys need to be told to respect girls - but girls need to be told to respect boys, as well . . . because somehow in decades of gender-evolution the concept of mutual respect sort of abandoned everyone.

I feel relief knowing that our daughter will have a more well rounded exposure to males - she'll be balanced and not full of herself and conceited.

 

[SmokeAndMirrors]

Auntie, the problem you speak of is a plague in my generation. An absolute plague.

I suspect it's the result of the pendulum swinging back, as it often does in situations where an underclass suddenly finds itself with its rights restored. The resent and unpleasantness often takes generations to die down. We're stilling dealing with it in racial relations, and I suspect that in 20 or 30 years we'll be dealing with it with gay people as well. It's a human thing.

But it's really heartbreaking to see. A lot of the best guys live with this internal self-loathing simply for having a penis. It's like they've been taught that all desires they may have are inherently rape should they act on them, and that everything they may say towards a woman is inherently demeaning. I struggle to think of a single guy I know under 25 who doesn't have that to some degree, and even most under 30.

I see both men and women perpetuating stereotypes about each other, though. The "women are incapable of logic" stereotype holds strong, with both men and women espousing it. And the "men are mindless hormone machines" stereotype is picking up speed, and again, with both men and women espousing it.

It's hard in the social environment we currently have with such badly broken gender politics, but men need to insist on their own self-worth as much as women do.

There are still genuine pigs and assholes out there, of course. There are also still kind women who treat men as they'd like to be treated. For what it's worth, I try my best.

P.S. Something else I've noticed that's pretty horrifying. There was an aspect to the feminist movement that is sometimes called the "orgasm revolution." Essentially, a lot of women felt they were being used during sex rather than their partners giving their pleasure any thought. The purpose of this was to bring attention to the female orgasm and mutual sexual relationships.

I'm starting to think men need an "orgasm revolution." I don't know if this is a new thing, but I would be inclined to think so. I have known a lot of younger guys who would rarely, if ever, get to orgasm during sexual activity with their partners. It just wasn't important to her, and therefore wasn't important in their sex lives. And they, being nice guys who were a bit psychologically stunted towards the opposite sex, simply put up with it.

I want to bludgeon people every time a guy tells me that. What's sad is that I've had several partners who have told me that about their sexual history.

 

[Gipper]

Do they, though? However nice that idea sounds - I know more females who appear to loath males and they're quite married - even happily so. I think women are like that in greater numbers than are men who dislike or disapprove of women.

I don't know many, if any, truly "happily" married women who have that sort of opinion about guys. If they do, then they're either putting up a facade, or have some deluded fantasy that they got the only decent man in the world. That would be fine - she would have very little social life outside of her husband with that attitude. When I was in a relationship, I would hang out with others in a relationship, but I'd also tell my buddies that they found a real bitch, even if she was completely good with him.

Not only do boys need to be told to respect girls - but girls need to be told to respect boys, as well . . . because somehow in decades of gender-evolution the concept of mutual respect sort of abandoned everyone.

Respect is nice, but it's also about boundaries and threshold. Let's face it - you're part of the overemotional gender. Women are genetically incapable of letting crap roll off their backs. They're sensitive, more apt to go to extremes, and worst of all vindictive. If you do something classified as disrespect to a guy, unless it being incredibly blatant and catastrophic, more often than not they're over it in 2 minutes, or get internally mopey for a brief time until they forget. Women? They can't let it go. Even the smallest crap will eat at them, turn them sour for an indefinite time period, and generally just make them intolerable. If you're a boyfriend/husband, it's exponentially worse.

Long story short, women disrespect men because they can get away with it.

 

[molten_dragon]

I mean, I write poetry, how much of a douche can I be? :lol:

A pretty big one I'm sure. The idea that a guy who writes poetry can't be a douche is every bit as much of a stereotype as what the OP is talking about.

 

[Superfly]

I get kind of tired of hearing that men are simple and uncomplicated. Like we're nothing more than input > output machines. I don't think anybody is simple.

I loathe the commercials that make men look idiots. What is it, a comcast commercial where the little girl tells her Dad "It's an invisible cord, Dad," when talking about wireless internet. It's a trend I've noticed for a long, long time -- that men are simple-minded and unable to cope at all with life, without SuperMom!1!!!11 there to hold his hand and tell him what to do.

 

[Gipper]

As I alluded to though...

Men don't get offended from that. However, if you made a commercial where you essentially call a woman stupid for being a woman, you'll have every feminist and civil liberties group in America crawling up your ass.

 

[Boring Bob]

I loathe the commercials that make men look idiots. What is it, a comcast commercial where the little girl tells her Dad "It's an invisible cord, Dad," when talking about wireless internet. It's a trend I've noticed for a long, long time -- that men are simple-minded and unable to cope at all with life, without SuperMom!1!!!11 there to hold his hand and tell him what to do.

I don't have much of a problem with that, though, because I know the vast majority of people in technical industries are men. There are certainly some brilliant women who help design computer processors, satellites, etc. but it's no secret that men overwhelmingly dominate the population of engineers. That said, most of the blue-collar type jobs are dominated by men as well, it seems, and the stereotype that those types of men are not technically capable has merit in my experience. It's those people that marketers are targeting, despite the upper-middle class style house used in the advert.

 

[TheLastIndependent]

A pretty big one I'm sure. The idea that a guy who writes poetry can't be a douche is every bit as much of a stereotype as what the OP is talking about.

That is true... But I am no douche.

The thought that guys use girls makes me want to break their jaws. I would say vice versatile but I'd never hit a girl so...

 

[SmokeAndMirrors]

Respect is nice, but it's also about boundaries and threshold. Let's face it - you're part of the overemotional gender. Women are genetically incapable of letting crap roll off their backs. They're sensitive, more apt to go to extremes, and worst of all vindictive. If you do something classified as disrespect to a guy, unless it being incredibly blatant and catastrophic, more often than not they're over it in 2 minutes, or get internally mopey for a brief time until they forget. Women? They can't let it go. Even the smallest crap will eat at them, turn them sour for an indefinite time period, and generally just make them intolerable. If you're a boyfriend/husband, it's exponentially worse.

As I alluded to though...

Men don't get offended from that. However, if you made a commercial where you essentially call a woman stupid for being a woman, you'll have every feminist and civil liberties group in America crawling up your ass.

Gipper, you are just as much part of the broken gender relations Auntie speaks of as the women who are playing the same game.

That is unmitigated BS. You wouldn't believe some of the ridiculous, insignificant stuff that I have seen men lose their minds over. Both of the most sensitive, empathetic people I know are men. That is probably coincidence. On the whole, I don't notice a ton of difference between men and women. Men just hide is more with other men because they're socially forced to. Women don't have to hide it with anyone. That's the one difference.

 

[Gipper]

Maybe you have a lot of gay friends. That could tip the scales.

I think we've evolved past the "men can't cry" stage of society.

 

[SmokeAndMirrors]

Maybe you have a lot of gay friends. That could tip the scales.

I think we've evolved past the "men can't cry" stage of society.

Not especially, no. If anything, I know more lesbians than gay men. The men I had in mind in that post are straight, actually.

We actually really haven't. I suppose it's better than it was, but we haven't. Men tell me as much all the time.

All the same, like I said, I don't see any significant difference between men and women in the emotionality regard.

 

[00timh]

Great topic. I am saddened by what both genders are going through as far as young adults and those who are almost there. As far as the plight of most men, I blame men. Young males today are not being raised to take care of business as they used to. To be responsible for themselves. The media this, women's interpretation of men that.... A lot of it is a mirror of what they see and perceive. Stand up guys who are taking care of themselves, being responsible, working hard and moving ahead in life will do just fine, and they still are doing just fine.

I am sure there are a lot of guys out there who are decent guys who are getting caught up with the new perceptions that are being thrown around. They simply need to rise above it by proving they are not a part of it. When they do and do not succumb to the stereotypes, they will do just fine.

 

[Risky Thicket]

I have been victimized by mouthy, hateful women all my life. Several have ripped my heart out and stomped that sucker flat. It's been horrible. It still hurts. I've been called names by women. OK, so I didn't have enough money to pay some of them at the time, but I was good for it. It's been a lifetime of pain. I know I'll feel better if DP women would reach out and PM nekkid pictures of themselves to me. Show you care.

 

[Superfly]

I have been victimized by mouthy, hateful women all my life. Several have ripped my heart out and stomped that sucker flat. It's been horrible. It still hurts. I've been called names by women. OK, so I didn't have enough money to pay some of them at the time, but I was good for it. It's been a lifetime of pain. I know I'll feel better if DP women would reach out and PM nekkid pictures of themselves to me. Show you care.

That sounds like the title of a very well-loved book I once read, by a very well-loved columnist.

 

[Risky Thicket]

Auntie, the problem you speak of is a plague in my generation. An absolute plague.

I suspect it's the result of the pendulum swinging back, as it often does in situations where an underclass suddenly finds itself with its rights restored. The resent and unpleasantness often takes generations to die down. We're stilling dealing with it in racial relations, and I suspect that in 20 or 30 years we'll be dealing with it with gay people as well. It's a human thing.

But it's really heartbreaking to see. A lot of the best guys live with this internal self-loathing simply for having a penis. It's like they've been taught that all desires they may have are inherently rape should they act on them, and that everything they may say towards a woman is inherently demeaning. I struggle to think of a single guy I know under 25 who doesn't have that to some degree, and even most under 30.

I'm not certain what to say about that. It's more than a little surprising to hear. No doubt what you are saying is correct, and you say it well, but I never knew it had progressed to the point that it has. Interesting.

I see both men and women perpetuating stereotypes about each other, though. The "women are incapable of logic" stereotype holds strong, with both men and women espousing it. And the "men are mindless hormone machines" stereotype is picking up speed, and again, with both men and women espousing it.

It's hard in the social environment we currently have with such badly broken gender politics, but men need to insist on their own self-worth as much as women do.

What you describe does seem to be an issue. I've said this before, but there doesn't seem to be a right of passage for young men anymore. Young men do often seem confused regarding their roles as men. Some do the metrosexual thing, which is godawful. I've seen a lot of young white men trying to be black. That sucks too, unless they are black. Some overcompensate and try to act however manly they think acting manly is. That often doesn't work well either. Manly isn't acting. It just is. It's there, you just have to be it and stop worrying about image and playing the role.

There are still genuine pigs and assholes out there, of course. There are also still kind women who treat men as they'd like to be treated. For what it's worth, I try my best.

There always were and there always will be pigs and assholes. Women should be themselves and if they aren't men should have the balls to walk. I'm serious. Same for the women. Men don't have the market cornered on pigs and assholes. I dated a few women who were. A few times it didn't start out that way. But when a woman got mean I would pack my **** and get. Why waste the time? You can do it respectfully, but no man nor woman should have to put up with meaness. Period.

P.S. Something else I've noticed that's pretty horrifying. There was an aspect to the feminist movement that is sometimes called the "orgasm revolution." Essentially, a lot of women felt they were being used during sex rather than their partners giving their pleasure any thought. The purpose of this was to bring attention to the female orgasm and mutual sexual relationships.

I've never heard of that before in my life. **** that! What the hell is going on out there? Sounds to me that both younger men and women need to be dating older men and women. Y'all need to get all Beatles on each other and "Come Together". I'm damned amazed.

I'm married to a good woman, but I did what I did before love came to town. I don't know how many women I dated and I don't know how many I slept with, but I didn't date many hateful women. Used to be men accused of hit and run, now women? Wrong, wrong, wrong. Great sex takes two people who are comfortable with who they are and what they like and who want to make the encounter pleasurable for their partner. When it comes to earth moving, building shaking sex, you get out of it what you put into it.

Now that whole cougar attraction thing has more meaning. Cougar aged ladies know how to have great sex. They knew it when they were younger too.

Perhaps, it's a generational thing for both sexes, Smoke. Self-identity and gender awareness.

I have known a lot of younger guys who would rarely, if ever, get to orgasm during sexual activity with their partners. It just wasn't important to her, and therefore wasn't important in their sex lives. And they, being nice guys who were a bit psychologically stunted towards the opposite sex, simply put up with it.

How is that even possible? I can't conceive of dating in that kind of world. My (formally) young ass would have headed for parts unknown. I'd be steady looking for a normal country, with normal women.

That was a great post, Smoke. I'm stunned. I see Auntie's post in an entirely different light now. Wow!

 

[Risky Thicket]

That sounds like the title of a very well-loved book I once read, by a very well-loved columnist.

I'm busted! Good for you!!! Lewis Grizzard was one of my favorites too. Grizzard graduated from the University of Georgia School of Journalism a few years before me. I imagine I've read everything he wrote. Being dead and all, I didn't think Lewis would mind if I thieved a sentence from him.

 

[Superfly]

I'm busted! Good for you!!! Lewis Grizzard was one of my favorites too. Grizzard graduated from the University of Georgia School of Journalism a few years before me. I imagine I've read everything he wrote. Being dead and all, I didn't think Lewis would mind if I thieved a sentence from him.

Darlin', I don't think Lewis would mind if he was alive. What a loss his death was. I've read most everything he's ever done. My favorite, though, over and above there rest, was Don't bend over in the garden, Granny. You know them taters have got eyes!" It was about love, sex and romance. There was one part -- I think the names were Cletus and Audrey - Cletus told Audrey (paraphrasing) to go get the twine, cuz he was gonna tie her up like the Marcus of Sod. :lol: :lol: Loved ole' Lewis.

 

[Surtr]

Not at all - the constant derision and offensive tongue that's lashed out at males in general by countless females who think they know everything about the male of the species.

I am the mother of three boys - and I feel wretched knowing that they're doomed before they start to grow into men by the malicious, snide and immature presumptions and false beliefs held by a large number of women who cast them about without thought or hesitation.

I hope my boys find DECENT women who admire them, find them respect worthy and who don't just assume they're all about raging hormones and have a mental capacity as that of a 15 year old forever. . . because even now I can tell they will be well rounded, respectful adults and I hope that others see that later on in life - and even now.

And some women complain that men are pigs. :roll: Takes one to know one, apparently.

Ah, the queen of the hill types. Pretty much why I don't seek out relationships anymore. The biggest critics of men are the ones who know the least about us, and blame men for their personal failures. They're also most likely bat**** crazy. I know where I fall short, and I put all my cards on the table upfront so they can't say I didn't tell them so. Of course, they still get mad. Usually happens as soon as they realize that they're about to lose the free room and board the second they don't pull their own weight, or do anything to contribute to the relationship.