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Getting in touch with your femine side

Smeagol

Smeagol

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I got a call from a female colleague not long ago who needed help with a matter that could best be handled by another male colleague. This guy is one of the most metro guys I know. Anyway, he was standing next to me when the lady called so I said, here he is right now and handed him my cell phone. They've been chatting now for going on ten minutes on my phone over a matter that could have been handled in a 20 second question followed by a simple okay. He's not gay but has a reputation among the guys for having non-sexual metro tendencies that drive the guys nuts. I thought it might be fun to list ways guys can get in touch with their feminine side.

1. Needlessly drag out telephone conversations going on forever.
2. If a male friend you see regularly gets a new article of clothing, notice it and say something like: "Oh, I see you got a new pair of pants. Those look good on you."
3. Complement guys on their clothing in general; looks good on him, great color coordination, etc.
4. When with a male friend, say you need to stop in REAL QUICK to pick up something at a department store then while there try on clothes and look at yourself in the mirror while your friend waits.
5. Buy stuff with a 50/50 chance plan to return it, so be sure to keep the receipt.
6. Get your hair cut at a beauty parlor instead of a barber.
7. When going out for dinner, don't get an appetizer, but save room for desert especially if its chocolate!
8. Cry easily (guilty of this one :shock:)
9. Like flowers.
10. Go to the potty with a friend and/or if you happen to see a guy already there, especially if its somebody you know in a relatively empty restroom, use the urinal right nest to him.
11. Hate sports.


add your own.
 
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Hell, I dunno. I had enough trouble getting in touch with my male side, and I never want to go back. :lol:
 
I like flowers and sometimes will spend up to 10-15 minutes to pick out the right bouquet as opposed to taking 2min to pick out shoes or pants or other items of clothing.
and hate some sports entirely.
I also notice differences when women do something to change their appearance and act like it suits them.

Am I in touch enough with my feminine side?
 
13. Bring a lot of "man drama". Easily offended and respond with emotional demonstrations.
 
14. Try to tell the most mundane story in the most dramatic way possible without getting to the point in less than 5 minutes.
 
I tried to get in touch with my feminine side, but it said it had a headache.
 
- Have you ever waxed any part of your body for purely cosmetic reasons?
- Does your toolbox consist of 2 screwdrivers, one hammer and a pair of pliers or less?
- Do you wear a t-shirt under your t-shirt?
- Do you throw underwear (including socks) away just because they have a little hole?
- Have you ever said, "I'll have one too!" when your date orders an appletini?
 
I already did, a long, long time ago. ;-)

IMG_1058.webpIMG_1070.webp
 
20. You love going to the mall especially if there's nothing in particular you want to buy; just window shop.
21. You can never have enough pairs of shoes.
22. Androids suck, iPhones rock ( :wink2: me again).
23. Get pedicures and manicures. Bonus with polish, clear.
24. Get regular eyebrow threadings
25. Be terrified of insects
26. Choose muffins over bacon and eggs
27. Action/adventure and scifi movies suck. Romantic comedies rock. Romantic dramas rock more.
 
28. In slightly cooler weather, use that as an opportunity the wear a scarf. Not because your neck is freezing cold but because slightly cooler temperatures is going to be the only excuse you'll have to wear such a nice fashion accessory.
 
spud_meister said:
I tried to get in touch with my feminine side, but it said it had a headache.
Click to expand...

I tried to get in touch with my feminine side, and now I'm on the sexual predator list.
 
Smeagol said:
25. Be terrified of insects
Click to expand...

I can't stand certain insects, and the more legs they got the more creeped out I am. I also do not trust ants.
 
Well, when I have had too much to drink I sometimes sit down to pee. I hate pissing on my shoes.

Also, I hate putting dishes in the dishwasher that have not been pre-cleaned first.

I might as well turn in my man-card.
 
Meh. I'm about as Metro as Conan the Cimmerian.
 
Captain America said:
Well, when I have had too much to drink I sometimes sit down to pee. I hate pissing on my shoes.

Also, I hate putting dishes in the dishwasher that have not been pre-cleaned first.

I might as well turn in my man-card.
Click to expand...

That's only the first step. Next you'll be like me and just wash them all by hand using the dish washer as nothing more than a rack for them to dry. :o
 
Take a look at my avatar. Then ask if I have a problem getting in touch with my feminine side
 
Smeagol said:
I got a call from a female colleague not long ago who needed help with a matter that could best be handled by another male colleague. This guy is one of the most metro guys I know. Anyway, he was standing next to me when the lady called so I said, here he is right now and handed him my cell phone. They've been chatting now for going on ten minutes on my phone over a matter that could have been handled in a 20 second question followed by a simple okay. He's not gay but has a reputation among the guys for having non-sexual metro tendencies that drive the guys nuts. I thought it might be fun to list ways guys can get in touch with their feminine side.

1. Needlessly drag out telephone conversations going on forever.
2. If a male friend you see regularly gets a new article of clothing, notice it and say something like: "Oh, I see you got a new pair of pants. Those look good on you."
3. Complement guys on their clothing in general; looks good on him, great color coordination, etc.
4. When with a male friend, say you need to stop in REAL QUICK to pick up something at a department store then while there try on clothes and look at yourself in the mirror while your friend waits.
5. Buy stuff with a 50/50 chance plan to return it, so be sure to keep the receipt.
6. Get your hair cut at a beauty parlor instead of a barber.
7. When going out for dinner, don't get an appetizer, but save room for desert especially if its chocolate!
8. Cry easily (guilty of this one :shock:)
9. Like flowers.
10. Go to the potty with a friend and/or if you happen to see a guy already there, especially if its somebody you know in a relatively empty restroom, use the urinal right nest to him.
11. Hate sports.


add your own.
Click to expand...

  • When you're with a group, tell one of the guys you're going to use the restroom and ask if he wants to go with.
  • Send out Valentine Day cards to all your guy friends.
  • Try to combine a Super Bowl Party with a sleepover.
  • Stop at doors so your buddy can open them for you.
  • Always have fresh flowers in your home.
  • Wear brightly colored Speedos.
  • Buy a dog small enough to be another dog's bowel movement. Put a spike collar on her.
 
38. Make cooking your "sport" of choice.
39. Schedule a professional massage and then tell the parlor (is that what they're called?) it doesn't matter if your masseuse is male or female.

FYI: I'm not just being funny, every single one of these are things that either I or men I know have done!
 
Does drinking tea count?
 
Smeagol said:
...and don't forget to extend your pinky while sipping for maximum effect. ;)
Click to expand...

What do you mean ''don't forget to extend your pinkie?''

Are you saying that Yanks don't do it naturally??

(Gasp!!)
 
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