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Awkward situations

Lutherf

Lutherf

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I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
 
Lutherf said:
I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
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Hmm, sometimes men who have a vasectomy store sperm at a sperm bank "just in case" they change their minds. Also, some vasectomies don't quite "work," and a baby occurs. Since he's happy it's best to let it go and pretend to presume one or the other of my examples applied. LOL ;)
 
Lutherf said:
I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
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Vasectomies aren't always fool proof. ;)

When I was married, my husband had one. He was supposed to go back in after 6 months to leave a "sample" to make sure it "took". He never did. I wonder how many others didn't either only to discover later that....whoopsie... must've been some lead still in the pencil.
 
Yeah. That's pretty much what I've reconciled myself to. His wife is an absolute sweetheart so I'd hate for it to be otherwise.
 
Lutherf said:
I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
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Well I doubt he forgot that he may have had one, so I would have been all up in his grill with questions. Or asked him out far along she is, count that many months backwards on my finger, pause for a second, then let out a "Whew!. Congratulations."
 
Fisher said:
Well I doubt he forgot that he may have had one, so I would have been all up in his grill with questions. Or asked him out far along she is, count that many months backwards on my finger, pause for a second, then let out a "Whew!. Congratulations."
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I though about that but figured that if she was more than 18 months pregnant somebody would have mentioned something.:doh
 
Lutherf said:
I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
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Reminds me of the movie "The Ledge". ;)
 
Lutherf said:
I though about that but figured that if she was more than 18 months pregnant somebody would have mentioned something.:doh
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LOL. My wife has been talking about how she would really like to have a daughter. In my gene pool, most people who try to have a daughter after two boys ends up having like 37 boys before the daughter and the uterus fall out together, so I have considered it--it is just a matter of coming up with a plausible excuse for why I am lying there for two days with bags of frozen peas on my junk.
 
Lutherf said:
I though about that but figured that if she was more than 18 months pregnant somebody would have mentioned something.:doh
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Elephant pregnancy? :lol:

A friend of mine hurt something in a dune buggy accident that no man wants to hurt. 4 times his wife got pregnant when the doctors said it was impossible. (1 miscarriage) and he has three boys that there is absolutely no question as to who their father is, little clones, all of them.

Bite your tongue and wish him the best!
 
I think it's cute how everyone's trying to avoid saying "she f**ked some other dude".

This is the human condition, and it's hilarious. :D
 
GottaGo said:
Elephant pregnancy? :lol:

A friend of mine hurt something in a dune buggy accident that no man wants to hurt. 4 times his wife got pregnant when the doctors said it was impossible. (1 miscarriage) and he has three boys that there is absolutely no question as to who their father is, little clones, all of them.

Bite your tongue and wish him the best!
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Not that I recommend it but sometimes that kind of thing works out OK. When I was in my late teens I had an accident like that which caused a rather exotic (and painful) deformation. It took a few years to (pardon the pun) straighten out but during that time it was enough of a novelty that I learned to live with the pain.
 
All kinds of things are possible. But statistically, with basically a brand-new vasectomy... yeah. If that were me, I'd be getting my sperm count done again, and then when it almost certainly came back negative, I'd be pissed as hell.

But, that said, I completely agree with your approach to the situation. It is totally not your problem if he doesn't and won't think about that. Or, of course, there could be something else going on you don't know about.

So... just smile and nod.
 
Why not just ask him? I'm sure there's a reason for it, like he had the vasectomy reversed. If he knew his wife had cheated on him, he probably wouldn't be excitedly telling people about it...
 
kerussll said:
Why not just ask him? I'm sure there's a reason for it, like he had the vasectomy reversed. If he knew his wife had cheated on him, he probably wouldn't be excitedly telling people about it...
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You would be amazed what people can overlook or what kinds of unlikely things they'll believe to keep themselves from going off the rails.
 
kerussll said:
Why not just ask him? I'm sure there's a reason for it, like he had the vasectomy reversed. If he knew his wife had cheated on him, he probably wouldn't be excitedly telling people about it...
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Mainly because it's no one's business except the man and his wife's. Unless the guy is a close friend it's foolish to ask a coworker something like that. You have to continue to work with him. Making things awkward is a bad idea.
 
SassySmartie said:
Mainly because it's no one's business except the man and his wife's. Unless the guy is a close friend it's foolish to ask a coworker something like that. You have to continue to work with him. Making things awkward is a bad idea.
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Amen sister!!!

There is no way in hell I'd have opened that can of worms. Of course, if somebody else happened to ask I'd be willing to listen to the answer:lol:
 
kerussll said:
Why not just ask him? I'm sure there's a reason for it, like he had the vasectomy reversed. If he knew his wife had cheated on him, he probably wouldn't be excitedly telling people about it...
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It wold only be cheating if he didn't know about it and/or didn't approve. It is not exactly unusual for a woman to make use of a ......stud for the purposes of having a child, although usually that is if the husband is sterile to begin with prior to their marrying. My wife had permission to make use of such services, assuming I approved of the guy. We're past that stage now, at least for procreation. With my youngest in her senior year and her only just 6 years away I really don't want to start over.

Also, even though he doesn't advertise it, the man and his wife might be poly and there is a second husband whose gun is still loaded.
 
maquiscat said:
It wold only be cheating if he didn't know about it and/or didn't approve. It is not exactly unusual for a woman to make use of a ......stud for the purposes of having a child, although usually that is if the husband is sterile to begin with prior to their marrying. My wife had permission to make use of such services, assuming I approved of the guy. We're past that stage now, at least for procreation. With my youngest in her senior year and her only just 6 years away I really don't want to start over.

Also, even though he doesn't advertise it, the man and his wife might be poly and there is a second husband whose gun is still loaded.
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I dont think that's normal at all. :shock:
 
kerussll said:
I dont think that's normal at all. :shock:
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"Normal" according to what?

There are plenty of couples who are not strictly monogamous, ranging from having a threesome to shake things up on their 20th wedding anniversary, to regular swingers, to polyamorous, to "practical purposes" such as these.

Something being majority doesn't necessarily make it "normal." It just makes it culturally common.

However, the fact that Luther doesn't know what's going on -- if it's some kind of non-monogamous arrangement, or a vasectomy reversal, or a vasectomy failure, or cheating -- makes it inadvisable for him to pursue the situation and potentially cause marital problems in doing so, not to mention problems for himself.
 
Aren't vasectomies reverseable now?
 
rhinefire said:
Aren't vasectomies reverseable now?
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Eh... not exactly. That's like saying tattoos are removable. Sure, you can get laser removal, but chances are you'll never completely get rid of it, and sometimes you won't even be able to make an appreciable dent.

Is there a reversal surgery? Yes. Does it sometimes work? Yes.

But it fails just as often. And even when it works, your fertility will probably never be "normal" again. If you get a vasectomy, you should consider it permanent.
 
Lutherf said:
I just had a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was excited to tell me about his wife's latest pregnancy. The problem is that a year and a half ago he told me about his vasectomy. Since he was happy I was happy for him but I'm kind of scratching my head on this one.
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I don't have anything to add, but how exciting the possibilites in this story. I was enthralled just reading this much that you wrote. Absolutely delicious tale.
 
They are reversible.
 
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