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Why the heck does this happen?!

DDD

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Hi,

So we were playing Risk the board game the other day. And I notice that if my rivals do not think like I want them to, or play with tactics and techniques that I know work best, it gets to me! I feel sad that a rival does not thinks like I want them to!

How sick is that! Did it ever happened to you?

I mean why would a rival worry about me and ways how I think that they should think or play? A rival would seek opportunities to win for themselves and at my cost in Risk, with tactics that they are certain that work best, why would they bother with my BS?!

Yet it gets to me for some silly reason. Deep down I go like "Oh why won't you think like I want you to, why can't you play like I want you to!" I do not think it is over-control neither. It is just silly.

So advice on how to overcome this for it is costing me my games would be helpful. Thanks in advance.
 

RabidAlpaca

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It has to do with you wanting to feel like you're in control, when you aren't. Just recognize warfare is chaos, and roll with the punches. It is not the strongest who survive, but rather those most able to adapt.
 

Captain Adverse

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Hi,

So we were playing Risk the board game the other day. And I notice that if my rivals do not think like I want them to, or play with tactics and techniques that I know work best, it gets to me! I feel sad that a rival does not thinks like I want them to!

How sick is that! Did it ever happened to you?

I mean why would a rival worry about me and ways how I think that they should think or play? A rival would seek opportunities to win for themselves and at my cost in Risk, with tactics that they are certain that work best, why would they bother with my BS?!

Yet it gets to me for some silly reason. Deep down I go like "Oh why won't you think like I want you to, why can't you play like I want you to!" I do not think it is over-control neither. It is just silly.

So advice on how to overcome this for it is costing me my games would be helpful. Thanks in advance.
There's an old military adage "no plan survives first contact with the enemy." The point is to teach flexibility, and to recognize that the enemy is capable of reacting to changing situations too. Your frustration comes from having a "brilliant" plan and sticking to the original tactics regardless of how the opponent has adapted to them. This has lost many battles in real world history.

So, when you start a game remember that your opponent is as flexible as you are and will attempt to adapt with tactics not only to counter your moves but to try to take the initiative away from you. Instead of sticking to your original stratgey, adapt your tactics to maintain the intiative and eventually win. It's like in chess, where sometimes you have to sacrifice major pieces in order to win the game.
 
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DDD

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There's an old military adage "no plan survives first contact with the enemy." The point is to teach flexibility, and to recognize that the enemy is capable of reacting to changing situation too.
Good military adage! I like it thanks :)

Perhaps it has to do with uncertainty avoidance. I may have low tolerance for uncertain things that are bond to come up in war games. They differ in various cultures.

Dimensions - Geert Hofstede
 

tacomancer

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Is the question in the OP a joke?

The point of games like this is to win ...
 

wolfie

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Hi,

So we were playing Risk the board game the other day. And I notice that if my rivals do not think like I want them to, or play with tactics and techniques that I know work best, it gets to me! I feel sad that a rival does not thinks like I want them to!

How sick is that! Did it ever happened to you?

I mean why would a rival worry about me and ways how I think that they should think or play? A rival would seek opportunities to win for themselves and at my cost in Risk, with tactics that they are certain that work best, why would they bother with my BS?!

Yet it gets to me for some silly reason. Deep down I go like "Oh why won't you think like I want you to, why can't you play like I want you to!" I do not think it is over-control neither. It is just silly.

So advice on how to overcome this for it is costing me my games would be helpful. Thanks in advance.
Think yourself lucky..when I played board games with my brother and I was beating him..he used to up-end the game and chase me round with a look of demonic hate on his face, trying to hit me!!:lamo
 

tacomancer

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Think yourself lucky..when I played board games with my brother and I was beating him..he used to up-end the game and chase me round with a look of demonic hate on his face, trying to hit me!!:lamo
stop beating him then! :p
 

DDD

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Think yourself lucky..when I played board games with my brother and I was beating him..he used to up-end the game and chase me round with a look of demonic hate on his face, trying to hit me!!:lamo
Thanks for the heads up! Should I allow you to beat me in Risk then I get to chase you around, right? ;) :cool:
 

DDD

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Is the question in the OP a joke?

The point of games like this is to win ...
Your input would be interesting on this. Please engage?

So, you are playing to win right, they are also playing to win right, they play differently than you, and WAM, it gets to you!! Ever happened to you? What would you advise me for having this issue?
 

Goshin

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Hi,

So we were playing Risk the board game the other day. And I notice that if my rivals do not think like I want them to, or play with tactics and techniques that I know work best, it gets to me! I feel sad that a rival does not thinks like I want them to!

How sick is that! Did it ever happened to you?

I mean why would a rival worry about me and ways how I think that they should think or play? A rival would seek opportunities to win for themselves and at my cost in Risk, with tactics that they are certain that work best, why would they bother with my BS?!

Yet it gets to me for some silly reason. Deep down I go like "Oh why won't you think like I want you to, why can't you play like I want you to!" I do not think it is over-control neither. It is just silly.

So advice on how to overcome this for it is costing me my games would be helpful. Thanks in advance.


No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.



Edit: oops, Cap'n Adverse beat me to it...
 

Goshin

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Any alternative wise ones?

Well, it depends.


F'rinstance... I hate playing poker without money at stake. Even if it is nickel-and-dime stakes, at least put some real money on the table... THEN people act like they've got some skin in the game and they "play like they mean it". If it is just chips and there's no consequences to winning or losing, people do stupid crap and screw up the game.


That's why Laser Tag pretty much died out and Paintball still rules. In laser tag, you lost nothing getting shot but points. In Paintball, getting shot HURTS... you have an instinctive desire to avoid it. Therefore people take it more seriously, and do things like make use of available cover instead of just charging around like a comic-book hero.

See where I'm going? :)
 

tacomancer

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Your input would be interesting on this. Please engage?

So, you are playing to win right, they are also playing to win right, they play differently than you, and WAM, it gets to you!! Ever happened to you? What would you advise me for having this issue?
People have their own styles and ideas. This is such a basic concept of human interaction and so obvious that I have trouble understanding why this would bother you.
 

joko104

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My wife and I played as a team against two other people who invited us to play a game. Neither of us ever had. My wife and I read over the rules, set up our strategy - which seemed obvious enough. Her and I both fixed singularly on attacking only one of the two them, with a only few diversionary and seemingly stupid attack points against the other. By the time they figured it you, it was too late to save that one of their team - making it 2 against one.

Made them so angry that he just quit, said we "weren't playing right," and he seems to have never really gotten over that.

How do you "not play right" if you win a war game?:confused: Besides, that's the rule of a fight if 2 against 2. Hold off the stronger one of the two just enough while both of you totally take out the weaker of the 2. Then it is 2 against 1. In 2 against 2, you take out the weaker of the 2 opponents while doing minimal to hold off the stronger one.
 
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tacomancer

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My wife and I played as a team against two other people who invited us to play a game. Neither of us ever had. My wife and I read over the rules, set up our strategy - which seemed obvious enough. Her and I both fixed singularly on attacking only one of the two them, with a only few diversionary and seemingly stupid attack points against the other. By the time they figured it you, it was too late to save that one of their team - making it 2 against one.

Made them so angry that he just quit, said we "weren't playing right," and he seems to have never really gotten over that.

How do you "not play right" if you win a war game?:confused: Besides, that's the rule of a fight if 2 against 2. Hold off the stronger one of the two just enough while both of you totally take out the weaker of the 2. Then it is 2 against 1. In 2 against 2, you take out the weaker of the 2 opponents while doing minimal to hold off the stronger one.
Its war, if you win, you were playing it right.
 

DDD

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People have their own styles and ideas. This is such a basic concept of human interaction and so obvious that I have trouble understanding why this would bother you.
I saw some DP peers post posts of "You play to win." Perhaps I play for the thrill of it and when people play down it understimulates me. Hence I wish them to take other steps.

But then they win! It is like them winning with mud, snakes, poison plants, when you had artillery, airplanes, etc.
 

tacomancer

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I saw some DP peers post posts of "You play to win." Perhaps I play for the thrill of it and when people play down it understimulates me. Hence I wish them to take other steps.

But then they win! It is like them winning with mud, snakes, poison plants, when you had artillery, airplanes, etc.
Then you need a better understanding of strategy. Again, if they win, they are doing it right, its as simple as that. It puts it on you to learn why.
 

DDD

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Then you need a better understanding of strategy. Again, if they win, they are doing it right, its as simple as that. It puts it on you to learn why.
Exactly. It is like Vietnam with its low tech (e.g., underground muddy caves causing death with spiders, snakes, sneaky dart poison), understimulating moves, and overstimulating USA with high tech (e.g., helicopters, planes, bombs, tanks, etc).

Hmmm... Having written this though I see how they feed with my overstimulation and provide understimulation in return, blowing my esteem, and perhaps by purpose? I have been playing with the same guys for a while. Perhaps they have grown into my moves!

Now how to back them off from this?
 

tacomancer

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Exactly. It is like Vietnam with its low tech (e.g., underground muddy caves causing death with spiders, snakes, sneaky dart poison), understimulating moves, and overstimulating USA with high tech (e.g., helicopters, planes, bombs, tanks, etc).

Hmmm... Having written this though I see how they feed with my overstimulation and provide understimulation in return, blowing my esteem, and perhaps by purpose? I have been playing with the same guys for a while. Perhaps they have grown into my moves!

Now how to back them off from this?
Learn what they do and figure out the weaknesses in their methods.
 

NoC_T

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I hate strategy. You're guaranteed never to encounter the unexpected.

More enjoyable by far to simply not be there. Most amusing. Eventually, people start getting mad, and in the end, isn't that really what it's all about? It's all about teh lulz.
 

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Is the question in the OP a joke?

The point of games like this is to win ...
Not for everyone. I grew up playing games with siblings. All sorts of games. Lots and lots of 'em. I do not play to win. I play for the joy of playing, the camaraderie, the fun. In fact, there were times I felt badly when I won, because I could see the other person was distressed over losing. Maybe because I'm a mature female, and back in the day girls were discouraged from being competitive? I beat my dad at chess once...to this day, I regret it. What was I thinking? He was humiliated, all over a silly game. I should've let him win.

Not everyone is competitive. You've heard the saying..."It's the journey, not the destination"?
 
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