Heh, as soon as I read this thread earlier I started getting a headache. I didn't want to mention it for fear of manifesting it more in my head.
It's actually still here (the headache) but is far better now than it was.
Something did annoy me today though. I called the Colorado Quit Line and I asked them about it.
I was pretty specific in my question. I wanted to know if I had one cigarette in order to alleviate the headache, what the impact would be on my body's physiological withdrawl/recovery process.
The guy on the phone of course wanted to make it clear that they don't encourage that because one smoke leads to two, which becomes three, and so on - and then the person is back where they started.
I explained that I was an adult, and that I understood that, and that I wanted him to listen to my question and answer it without blowing smoke (heh) up my butt. He said okay.
So I asked, "My head hurts. It has been about 48 hours since I quit. If I smoke one cigarette to alleviate the headache, will this impact my body's progress away from addiction and if so, to what extent?"
The ONLY answer I could get this guy (Eric - yes, I know your name and you can count on hearing from me tomorrow too you little weasel) to give me is that "It can cause a full physiological relapse, as though you had only just now stopped smoking your 40 cigarettes per day."
In other words, he claimed that smoking that one cigarette would potentially put me back to the moment I had put out my last cigarette over 52 hours ago now.
So I accepted his answer after I made him swear he wasn't BSing me.
Then I hung up. Then I checked on the net.
AND HE IS A DAMNED LIAR WHICH I KNEW AT THE TIME BUT GAVE HIM A CHANCE ANYWAY!
Duh - no way in Hell does a person's nicotine, carcinogen, or other additives levels return to previous levels, and no, the brain does not respond to 1 MG of nicotine (which is what we take in from one cigarette) the same way it would if it was already flooded with 40MG of nicotine (like it was when I quit smoking 52 hours ago).
That's simply not realistic, and I didn't buy it when he told me it on the phone.
So I called back and talked to someone else, and I told them that I had checked on the net and found Eric to be a liar.
I pointed out that if I call them and they lie to me about things, I simply won't call them any more, and will get my information and support from other sources where they probably are not as well trained or as educated about the topic.
I also pointed out that I am an adult, and that it is possible to "trick" children and puppies into doing certain things, but that it would be a stiff challenge indeed to "trick a full-grown educated adult into not smoking for the rest of their life."
I got kinna snotty. I was pissed. Of course right now everything pisses me off, but this would piss me off regardless.
You can tell me there's a gas leak, and I might stop smoking for a bit in that area, but you're not going to keep me from smoking for life with this gag. At some stage, I have to reconcile the truth on my own. I'm a big boy, and I eventually have to come to that decision on my own, based on facts that I understand and accept, or I simply will not quit.
I did NOT appreciate calling the quit line of all places, asking a point blank honest question, acknowledged what Eric was saying and insist on a straight-forward answer, and have him lie to me as though I am a child.
Obviously, smoking one cigarette will probably ease the headache. No, it's not a good idea to smoke the 1 cigarette. It will not put me back to square one, however (duh).
In any case, the headache is mostly gone, and I never did smoke the cigarette... But I do plan to let Eric know he's a dumbass tomorrow. Yeah, I'm going to call back and hunt him down - because I am a smoker who is angry and quitting and who has time on their hands.
Anyway, headache's mostly gone, but it does come and go in terms of strength, and it's always present to some degree. The cravings are incredibly manageable now - not bad at all really. The headache and dizziness are all that really remain. I do still have some other cravings, but by and large, this is okay.
This thread has helped a lot. Thank you all very much.