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Revocation of Independence

PeteEU

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Revocation of Independence | itzhakts

In light of your failure to financially manage yourselves and inability to effectively govern yourselves responsibly, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up ‘revocation’ in the Oxford English Dictionary.)Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy).

LOL is a brilliant read.
 

Bob Blaylock

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Neither new, nor brilliant. It's an old joke that was never really funny even when it was new.

Keep in mind that the United States was never voluntarily given its independence by Britain. We kicked their asses, hard, in order to seize this independence for ourselves. And we kicked their asses again, in 1812, when they failed to learn the lesson from the previous war. And now, we are so much bigger and more powerful than we were in 1812, and relatively so much bigger and more powerful than Britain can ever hope to be, that were Britain to step too far over the line, we could simply wipe the whole of Britain off the face of the earth in mere minutes, without breaking a sweat. Not that I think it will ever come to that. Even if the government of the U.K. got it into their heads to entertain the idea of messing with us in such a manner, I don't think there's one among them who would risk the ass-kicking that they all know would surely be coming their way if they ever tried.

I'm sure that the Queen is a nice lady, and she probably cringes with embarrassment and more than a little annoyance every time she learns of this ridiculous piece being distributed under her name.
 
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Higgins86

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Neither new, nor brilliant. It's an old joke that was never really funny even when it was new.

Keep in mind that the United States was never voluntarily given its independence by Britain. We kicked their asses, hard, in order to seize this independence for ourselves. And we kicked their asses again, in 1812, when they failed to learn the lesson from the previous war. And now, we are so much bigger and more powerful than we were in 1812, and relatively so much bigger and more powerful than Britain can ever hope to be, that were Britain to step too far over the line, we could simply wipe the whole of Britain off the face of the earth in mere minutes, without breaking a sweat. Not that I think it will ever come to that. Even if the government of the U.K. got it into their heads to entertain the idea of messing with us in such a manner, I don't think there's one among them who would risk the ass-kicking that they all know would surely be coming their way if they ever tried.

I'm sure that the Queen is a nice lady, and she probably cringes with embarrassment and more than a little annoyance every time she learns of this ridiculous piece being distributed under her name.


1. Learn to take a joke.
2. The war of independence was hardly " an ass kicking". You defeated an enemy who was operating thousands of miles from their home with slow supply lines and you were aided by another imperial power France.
3. 1812 was not a defeat for the British so you might want to read up on your history pal. Also worth pointing out Britain held off the US in 1812 whilst fighting another war in Europe against a much bigger threat.
4. The US has never won a war on her own and struggled to tame Vietnam so good luck wiping Britain a nuclear armed country off the map.
5. In 500 years the British empire will be regarded as one of the most important periods in human history.
 

Gaugingcatenate

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1. Learn to take a joke.
2. The war of independence was hardly " an ass kicking". You defeated an enemy who was operating thousands of miles from their home with slow supply lines and you were aided by another imperial power France.
3. 1812 was not a defeat for the British so you might want to read up on your history pal. Also worth pointing out Britain held off the US in 1812 whilst fighting another war in Europe against a much bigger threat.
4. The US has never won a war on her own and struggled to tame Vietnam so good luck wiping Britain a nuclear armed country off the map.
5. In 500 years the British empire will be regarded as one of the most important periods in human history.
Notice how everybody who gets beat has great, and sometimes not so great, excuses?

Britain got their butts handed to them alright, Monday morning quarterback all you want. The only real enemy that ever gave us real pause were ourselves, the Confederates. I would say on average we, Americans, take 10 for every one we lose, we make it hurt to take us on... only the stupid would even consider it. Of course, sadly, there are stupid out there.

And...

You prove you don't really know your American History. We won the Mexican-American war without any help, the Spanish-American War without any help, won both Iraq wars allowing others to participate, but come on, you don't really think it was anybody that was doing the butt kicking that mattered, that was decisive to those victories, do you?

We, America, I think you could confidently express, won the Cold War without any help...hell, we were paying for your and rest of Western Europe's rebuilding, all being bankrupt, bombed to rubble or both, at the same time rebuilding and running Japan... then for the last almost 70 years protecting all y'all's behinds with our nuclear and military deterrence, at totally our own expense. And Vietnam was only a delaying action in our long adhered to, and brilliant I will add, Containment Policy. Worked, not much muss, not that much fuss, just did it.

Y'all couldn't even take care of the break up of Yugoslavia in your own backyard...whereas when we have problems in our hemisphere, we generally wrap them up fast and pretty clean [ Grenada, Panama, less so Nicaragua ]...

I think Britain, myself, besides the butt kicking we gave y'all, has already attained its high place in planetary history...so you needn't worry with the long wait.
 

Higgins86

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Notice how everybody who gets beat has great, and sometimes not so great, excuses?

Britain got their butts handed to them alright, Monday morning quarterback all you want. The only real enemy that ever gave us real pause were ourselves, the Confederates. I would say on average we, Americans, take 10 for every one we lose, we make it hurt to take us on... only the stupid would even consider it. Of course, sadly, there are stupid out there.

And...

You prove you don't really know your American History. We won the Mexican-American war without any help, the Spanish-American War without any help, won both Iraq wars allowing others to participate, but come on, you don't really think it was anybody that was doing the butt kicking that mattered, that was decisive to those victories, do you?

We, America, I think you could confidently express, won the Cold War without any help...hell, we were paying for your and rest of Western Europe's rebuilding, all being bankrupt, bombed to rubble or both, at the same time rebuilding and running Japan... then for the last almost 70 years protecting all y'all's behinds with our nuclear and military deterrence, at totally our own expense. And Vietnam was only a delaying action in our long adhered to, and brilliant I will add, Containment Policy. Worked, not much muss, not that much fuss, just did it.

Y'all couldn't even take care of the break up of Yugoslavia in your own backyard...whereas when we have problems in our hemisphere, we generally wrap them up fast and pretty clean [ Grenada, Panama, less so Nicaragua ]...

I think Britain, myself, besides the butt kicking we gave y'all, has already attained its high place in planetary history...so you needn't worry with the long wait.



Its not really an excuse its just wasn't an " ass kicking" especially when you consider the amount of wars Britain has won and lost over the last 1000 years. It was a war fought thousands of miles from home against an enemy who knew the land better, were heavily supplied by other countries and were fighting for their own freedom. Majority of British casualties were because of scurvy not enemy gun fire and we maintained our foothold in the region with Canada and the West Indies. For Americans it is and always will be a topic much discussed and glorified because of what it meant to your country but for Britain it was just a minor defeat to an Empire that had yet to reach its full potential.
 

tech30528

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I can understand her getting all bunged up about it, she's probably never had a Philly cheese steak, a Chicago dog, good BBQ, anything creole. You ever have British food? The reason they have such bad teeth is not that they don't have dentists, it's that they just don't see the point.

And their cars? Are you kidding me? With the way they wire them they shouldn't be allowed to drive outdoors. You know why they drink warm beer? They have Lucas refrigerators.
 

Gaugingcatenate

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Its not really an excuse its just wasn't an " ass kicking" especially when you consider the amount of wars Britain has won and lost over the last 1000 years. It was a war fought thousands of miles from home against an enemy who knew the land better, were heavily supplied by other countries and were fighting for their own freedom. Majority of British casualties were because of scurvy not enemy gun fire and we maintained our foothold in the region with Canada and the West Indies. For Americans it is and always will be a topic much discussed and glorified because of what it meant to your country but for Britain it was just a minor defeat to an Empire that had yet to reach its full potential.

Funny, your description of our Revolutionary War [where we threw off the tyrant, your king ]...sounds oddly similar to the one you criticize us for, failing to tame Vietnam...with the far, thousands of miles away far, war, our enemies supported/heavily supplied by our other enemies [ that we were fighting a Cold War with ], an enemy who knew their own land better and who were fighting for survival...and we too, were involved in many other efforts at the time.

And, the fact is that, up until the rather recent modern era, almost all wars resulted in most of the casualties being from disease. Our worst War, which we also fought without anyone's help and, I might add, we won it, was with our own people in which over 600,000 died...2 to disease for every one lost on the battlefield.

You most certainly are free to denigrate our win, but its just dourly sour grapes my friend. :peace
 
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