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When a friend died

Very... a strange topic... not everyone will be able to understand it.
Speaking of the death of a friend, I say dogs.
For the total majority of the world, this is an insignificant event. What's the big deal? Dog, animal... died... and died.
And your soul is tearing apart.
This is not a person and no one cares... and it's hard to explain. That you loved him, that he was important to you. And you understand that the world doesn't give a shit about such pain, "get yourself a new dog" will answer you. Like it's a jacket.
After all, his love was absolutely sincere, he doesn't care what kind of political views you have, how much you are a faithful husband or citizen. He loved you like a native person without any "buts".
And it doesn't matter to anyone how torn your soul is from this.
 
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Fabiusbile said:
Very... a strange topic... not everyone will be able to understand it.
Speaking of the death of a friend, I say dogs.
For the total majority of the world, this is an insignificant event. What's the big deal? Dog, animal... died... and died.
And your soul is tearing apart.
This is not a person and no one cares... and it's hard to explain. That you loved him, that he was important to you. And you understand that the world doesn't give a shit about such pain, "get yourself a new dog" will answer you. Like it's a jacket.
After all, his love was absolutely sincere, he doesn't care what kind of political views you have, how much you are a faithful husband or citizen. He loved you like a native person without any "buts".
And it doesn't matter to anyone how torn your soul is from this.
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Sorry Fabiusbile. We see pets a bit like human infants - innocent and helpless; we want to protect them. We feel this way for their entire lives and when they die it's hard. In a lot of ways we've lost a child.
 
I feel your loss

I own a doggy daycare/boarding kennel and my customer's dogs almost become my family as much as theirs

Losing a family member is extremely tough, even when they are the four legged variety.

It will get better....it takes time to grieve and heal, but it will get better. And yeah, maybe someday you will want to replace the loved one you lost. There is plenty of time to think about that later on. For now, remember all the great times you spent together, and all the joy they brought to your life. Dogs have an innate sense on how their owners are feeling, and can make us smile even on our lowest days....remember a few of those....and toast to mans best friend.
 
Recently went through losing my Lab early this summer, its a thing that hits me a lot harder than losing a person.
I am closer to dogs than I am to people, no doubt a lot of people wouldn't understand that but thats how I am.

People that are not dog people would never understand. Peace to you.
 
PeacefulWarrior said:
Recently went through losing my Lab early this summer, its a thing that hits me a lot harder than losing a person.
I am closer to dogs than I am to people, no doubt a lot of people wouldn't understand that but thats how I am.

People that are not dog people would never understand. Peace to you.
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I lost my little buddy this spring.A yellow lab,12 years old.It about killed me.It will take you time to get over it.
 
gulfman said:
I lost my little buddy this spring.A yellow lab,12 years old.It about killed me.It will take you time to get over it.
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Mine was 12 as well, 2 months shy of 13.
I thank the Universe that we had such a long time together, but it never would have been long enough.
 
Fabiusbile said:
Very... a strange topic... not everyone will be able to understand it.
Speaking of the death of a friend, I say dogs.
For the total majority of the world, this is an insignificant event. What's the big deal? Dog, animal... died... and died.
And your soul is tearing apart.
This is not a person and no one cares... and it's hard to explain. That you loved him, that he was important to you. And you understand that the world doesn't give a shit about such pain, "get yourself a new dog" will answer you. Like it's a jacket.
After all, his love was absolutely sincere, he doesn't care what kind of political views you have, how much you are a faithful husband or citizen. He loved you like a native person without any "buts".
And it doesn't matter to anyone how torn your soul is from this
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sigh,... I've had a dog (or is the other way around),... since I was five

still remember when I was ten (just waked home from school), and asking where is "Charlie" AND my mom telling me he got hit by a car,... and feeling like I was gut punched

always, sucks losing a best friend

4x6-PC-a-man-s-best-friend.png


BTW about what you wrote,... IMHO the world be a much better place if "political extremist" viewed the other side like a dog rather than the enemy,... sadly due to human nature, "political extremist" are not very aware
 
Condolences on your loss Fabiusbile.
There are a lot of folks here on DP who have pets, and know what you are going through.
They really are a family member.

We are facing an aging dog who's spinal arthritis is slowly taking strength and control from his rear legs, yet his spirit remains strong and steadfast.
This one is going to be a tough call, but if he can't get up on his own, I think it's going to be time. :(
 
Most of our animals are geriatric, and although we have all lost beloved pets throughout the years, we are going to lose at least one doggie and one lady-cat very soon. I am trying to prepare, sigh. And it's not just the humans who mourn; it's the other animals too. When I lost my Aussie in 2015, my man-cat Rocco knew and lay down with her, refusing to leave her side until I had to take her to her final appointment. Afterward, he sat on the porch railing near to her grave and wailed for two weeks. He was inconsolable, and it was just awful.

It's absolutely true that childless people very often regard their pets as their children. It's true in my own household, and the elderly doggie we're going to lose is a certified emotional-support dog, so I am very concerned that even though the loss is expected, it will spark a downward spiral for his owner. But I must offer a very different perspective from most people (and thank goodness for this) because I am a bereaved parent. Losing your child is not the same and is far, far more terrible, enduringly so, than can be imagined by anyone who hasn't experienced it.
 
nota bene said:
Most of our animals are geriatric, and although we have all lost beloved pets throughout the years, we are going to lose at least one doggie and one lady-cat very soon. I am trying to prepare, sigh. And it's not just the humans who mourn; it's the other animals too. When I lost my Aussie in 2015, my man-cat Rocco knew and lay down with her, refusing to leave her side until I had to take her to her final appointment. Afterward, he sat on the porch railing near to her grave and wailed for two weeks. He was inconsolable, and it was just awful.

It's absolutely true that childless people very often regard their pets as their children. It's true in my own household, and the elderly doggie we're going to lose is a certified emotional-support dog, so I am very concerned that even though the loss is expected, it will spark a downward spiral for his owner. But I must offer a very different perspective from most people (and thank goodness for this) because I am a bereaved parent. Losing your child is not the same and is far, far more terrible, enduringly so, than can be imagined by anyone who hasn't experienced it.
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Nota, belated condolences at the loss of your child. Thankfully, I have not had to face that situation.
 
eohrnberger said:
Nota, belated condolences at the loss of your child. Thankfully, I have not had to face that situation.
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It's truly unimaginable. I am one of the very lucky bereaved parents. Two days ago a very old friend's 27-year old son committed suicide. And I've known bereaved parents whose children were murdered. I cannot, cannot imagine their suffering and am grateful for this.
 
romance said:
I am very sorry for your loss. Animals have a pure and unconditional love for their people and they are always taken from us way too soon.
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Yes, almost always.

And that is the trade-off--in exchange for unconditional love and acceptance, you know all along that you will outlive your animal and will mourn.
 
nota bene said:
It's truly unimaginable. I am one of the very lucky bereaved parents. Two days ago a very old friend's 27-year old son committed suicide. And I've known bereaved parents whose children were murdered. I cannot, cannot imagine their suffering and am grateful for this.
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I can only imagine that the murder of your child is bad, but your child committing suicide is even worse. 😭
 
Fabiusbile said:
Very... a strange topic... not everyone will be able to understand it.
Speaking of the death of a friend, I say dogs.
For the total majority of the world, this is an insignificant event. What's the big deal? Dog, animal... died... and died.
And your soul is tearing apart.
This is not a person and no one cares... and it's hard to explain. That you loved him, that he was important to you. And you understand that the world doesn't give a shit about such pain, "get yourself a new dog" will answer you. Like it's a jacket.
After all, his love was absolutely sincere, he doesn't care what kind of political views you have, how much you are a faithful husband or citizen. He loved you like a native person without any "buts".
And it doesn't matter to anyone how torn your soul is from this.
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I'm not sure we ever get over it or should get over losing our best friend. Over time, we do learn to manage the wound, and that I think allows us to take on the risk, open our hearts, and love another dog or cat again.

I am so sorry for your loss.
 
I have always had dogs, and at my age I've had many. Each time one passes I tell myself I won't get another, the pain is too much. Then as time passes the pain subsides, and the desire for the friendship a dog can provide overcomes the pain. And the cycle begins again.
 
Fabiusbile said:
Very... a strange topic... not everyone will be able to understand it.
Speaking of the death of a friend, I say dogs.
For the total majority of the world, this is an insignificant event. What's the big deal? Dog, animal... died... and died.
And your soul is tearing apart.
This is not a person and no one cares... and it's hard to explain. That you loved him, that he was important to you. And you understand that the world doesn't give a shit about such pain, "get yourself a new dog" will answer you. Like it's a jacket.
After all, his love was absolutely sincere, he doesn't care what kind of political views you have, how much you are a faithful husband or citizen. He loved you like a native person without any "buts".
And it doesn't matter to anyone how torn your soul is from this.
Click to expand...
I'm so sorry, Fabiusbile. We do care; it hurts a lot. You have not really lost him, your friend will live on in your heart and memories once time has filled that awful hole a little.

All the best.
 
So sad. My dog is the first and only dog I have ever had. I can't imagine living one day without him. I think dog lovers love their dogs unconditionally. Something about knowing that a dog has only a certain amount of years to live is hard to accept for me but in my case I plan on giving him my best while I have him.
 
eohrnberger said:
This one is going to be a tough call, but if he can't get up on his own, I think it's going to be time. :(
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Thats what happened to my good buddy Coco, he got a bad back, steadily got worse until one day I got home from golfing and he couldn't stand up or walk on his own.
I knew that was the end of the line, thank the Universe we had almost 13 years together. The Universe answered all my prayers, let him live a long time, kept him pretty healthy and maintenance free until about 2 months before he passed, blessed us with good fortune to be able to keep him at the same house and nice property for his entire lifespan.
If he cant stand up or walk, and there's no chance of getting better, then you have to show your good buddy mercy and do the right thing by him even though its terrible and difficult.

I sometimes wonder who will be around to do the right thing by me if I get to the point of not being able to take care of myself. Its not a great thing to think about but I'd like to have the option of a painless departure on my own terms. If I'm lucky I'll be like my grandfather and still be driving a car at age 95, then just suddenly pass in my sleep.(y)
 
PeacefulWarrior said:
If he cant stand up or walk, and there's no chance of getting better, then you have to show your good buddy mercy and do the right thing by him even though its terrible and difficult.
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And that's just the phrase I use--"do the right thing." No matter how terrible it is for you, it's your obligation of gratitude.

I was very proud of my then-9-year old daughter when her Akita had to be put down. He savagely attacked our other dog for no reason, and like the fools we both remain, we jumped right in and were hurt too. I let her make the decision because I was certain she'd make the right one, and to our vet the next day we went. The vet told her she didn't have to stay in the room, but my daughter wouldn't have it any other way. And when the doggie's bladder emptied and made a mess on the floor, she headed straight for the paper towels and insisted that she be the one to clean up. I was very proud of her that day.

You have to do the right thing, and you have to do right by your animals, no matter how difficult it is. A friend's now ex-husband allowed his dog to suffer terribly with a brain tumor for over a year because he "just wasn't ready to let go." Someone this selfish doesn't deserve to have a dog.
 
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