What is a good age to die?

[Chomsky]

I have several centenarians on both sides of my family. Within that bunch are some incredibly positive people. Even with those, life seems to begin early stages of grim-ness at 85-90.

My God! You better budget for a very long retirement!

 

[Chomsky]

I once watched a documentary where they talked to centenarians from all over the world and when asked what the hardest thing about being 100 years old, pretty much to a person they said it was losing everyone around them. Your spouse, your siblings, everyone you grew up with, probably even some of your children - by the time you hit 100, you've probably seen them all die. That takes a toll, no matter how positive your outlook. I can't imagine what it'd be like to be immortal and have to go through that time after time.

This is why I believe it is critical to have a "love of life itself".

Some do. I've seen it with some around me. They just love life and all it offers. I was blessed to have several like that in my life.

Some others, do not.

I don't know if this "love of life" is a learned or an innate behaviour. But some have it, and some don't.

 

[Grogu]

Your father sounds like a jewel, and in my humble opinion you could do far worse than trying to emulate him!

I'd also add that your parents being so long-lived bodes well for you. You're a lucky man on multiple fronts.

You’re absolutely right, Chomsky, I am lucky on all counts. So many of my friends have no parents around anymore to enjoy.

Dad was in the submarine service in the Pacific when he did his tour in the Navy. He was a pretty unique guy, and I never hesitated to try to follow his reputation and notoriety. We both worked for the same company but in different units, and many people used to ask me if I was Larry’s son. He was called a legend to this day by some, because after retiring at age 66, he was hired back immediately as a part-time contract employee to work for another 14 years. He knew and experienced so much in his career. One of a kind.

 

[Chomsky]

You’re absolutely right, Chomsky, I am lucky on all counts. So many of my friends have no parents around anymore to enjoy.

Dad was in the submarine service in the Pacific when he did his tour in the Navy. He was a pretty unique guy, and I never hesitated to try to follow his reputation and notoriety. We both worked for the same company but in different units, and many people used to ask me if I was Larry’s son. He was called a legend to this day by some, because after retiring at age 66, he was hired back immediately as a part-time contract employee to work for another 14 years. He knew and experienced so much in his career. One of a kind.

A submariner? That explains it. Those guys are mentally tough!

He sounds like a tough act to follow, Grogu. But that's a good thing!

 

[Cordelier]

This is why I believe it is critical to have a "love of life itself".

Some do. I've seen it with some around me. They just love life and all it offers. I was blessed to have several like that in my life.

Some others, do not.

I don't know if this "love of life" is a learned or an innate behaviour. But some have it, and some don't.

I think that's essential.... that and emotional resilience. You've got to be able to handle the curveballs that life throws at you. No matter how charmed your life is, we all get knocked down sooner or later. Not everyone can get up and brush themselves off and keep going, though.

 

[Cordelier]

You’re absolutely right, Chomsky, I am lucky on all counts. So many of my friends have no parents around anymore to enjoy.

Dad was in the submarine service in the Pacific when he did his tour in the Navy. He was a pretty unique guy, and I never hesitated to try to follow his reputation and notoriety. We both worked for the same company but in different units, and many people used to ask me if I was Larry’s son. He was called a legend to this day by some, because after retiring at age 66, he was hired back immediately as a part-time contract employee to work for another 14 years. He knew and experienced so much in his career. One of a kind.

Submariners are definitely a different breed - especially the old salts.

 

[joluoto]

It's a bit morbid, but is there an ideal age to die ?

It's when you don't want to live, and that's the only time it's ideal to die.

 

[anatta]

"Hope I die before I get old" (My Generation -the Who)

 

[AConcernedCitizen]

If you die at 27, you get to be part of the 27 Club along with Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Kobain, Amy Winehouse, Jim Morrison, and Brian Jones, among others.

 

[devildavid]

I think we all hold that "secret" within us, Juin.

Some of us hold a child-like curiosity & interest as to what every day may hold for us, what joy or new knowledge or new experience it may bring? My grandfather was exactly like that, and he was a strong influence on me.

My grandfather never lost that childlike enthusiasm for the secrets and experiences every new day may hold & reveal. Every day for him was a new place to go or see, or a new activity to try. And during his retirement when I was not in school, he took me with him wherever his adventures called. In fact, it was this same need for adventure that brought him to America at the age of sixteen, starting our family in the New World, a place filled with new things & new possibilities waiting to be discovered.

His infectious personality rubbed-off on me.

--

But also,

In the external sense, I also believe the secret is to surround yourself with people you love and who love you.

--

A confirming example of why I can say all the above so adamantly & confidently, actually just occurred over the weekend. In total happenstance serendipity, by a lucky random chance crossing of paths & events, a person from my childhood came back into my life - and was overjoyed to see me.

Despite my strong childhood feelings towards this person, I thought they had spurned me way back then. They had simply disappeared. Never to be heard from again. It turns-out we became separated due to their family events beyond their control. But they had always had the same strong feelings & longing I did. But, without any contact between us I never knew this.

The mutual loss of our childhood relationship was an unresolved conflict for me, even as I grew over it and it receded into the shadows of my mind & soul. But this weekend it came back to the forefront, and was joyously resolved! We spent the entire evening wrapped in discussion, proclaiming the tragically cut-off mutual childhood joy we had for each other, the current joy we we now had for finding each-other again, and the wonderment of the chance coming back together after a long lifetime of separated years! Our story of separation and reuniting could make a published short-story!

I am still riding a high over our reunification, and knowing that we will now remain part of each-others' lives going forward!

And that, Juin, is why I greet every day excitedly for the wonderment it may hold for me!

--

tl;dr hold childlike wonderment at the opportunity for the discoveries and unexpected joys each day may reveal, and surround yourself with those you love and love you

Great post. I am lucky to have found the one person who makes my life an adventure. But for the most part, I am not a people person so my circle of friends and family is very small. But I do look at each day as a chance to explore and learn. Much of what I explore involves various forms of entertainment. I love music, movies, and tv. And everything that I get into, I love to learn as much about it as I can. I also just have this stubborn desire to see what happens next for better or worse. My approach isn’t quite as joyous as what you describe, but I do still feel like a kid wanting to see more, experience more, and learn more.

 

[Bum]

If I had a say in the matter, I would choose to be immortal

Honestly, that's one thing I would never wish for.

 

[Chomsky]

I think that's essential.... that and emotional resilience. You've got to be able to handle the curveballs that life throws at you. No matter how charmed your life is, we all get knocked down sooner or later. Not everyone can get up and brush themselves off and keep going, though.

Yep. "Love of thyself", IMHO, is the key element.

If you motivate your well being dependent upon things outside yourself, what happens when you lose those things?

 

[Chomsky]

Great post.

Thank you!

I am lucky to have found the one person who makes my life an adventure. But for the most part, I am not a people person so my circle of friends and family is very small. But I do look at each day as a chance to explore and learn. Much of what I explore involves various forms of entertainment. I love music, movies, and tv. And everything that I get into, I love to learn as much about it as I can. I also just have this stubborn desire to see what happens next for better or worse. My approach isn’t quite as joyous as what you describe, but I do still feel like a kid wanting to see more, experience more, and learn more.

This is all my humble opinion:

It's great to have partners in life's adventures. But the important thing is those adventures are embraced from one's inner self - firstly & innately.

The reason being, if it doesn't start with you, and you lose your partner, what do you have left?

Everything starts within. We need to hold these good things within, and propagate them upon others; not the other way around.

 

[Revelation]

It's when you don't want to live, and that's the only time it's ideal to die.

as Christians, we walk by faith. the Best time to die is when God thinks so; when our ministry down here is done and not one minute before.

my opinion on this is worth Zero, it is God who is my Pilot, King, and light to my path. without God running the show, then it is ALL aimless and meaningless.

start there friends.

.

 

[Chomsky]

as Christians, we walk by faith. the Best time to die is when God thinks so; when our ministry down here is done and not one minute before.

my opinion on this is worth Zero, it is God who is my Pilot, King, and light to my path. without God running the show, then it is ALL aimless and meaningless.

start there friends.

I think you wrote this beautifully, and you get my respect for so unabashedly proclaiming your Faith.

I think your Faith expression ("when your ministry is done") also works well in a metaphorical sense in a non-Faith context, as well. Just as "We are all children of God" works well metaphorically outside of a Faith context.

Your use of "ministry" was a golden nugget! Well done!

 

[MamboDervish]

as Christians, we walk by faith. the Best time to die is when God thinks so; when our ministry down here is done and not one minute before.

my opinion on this is worth Zero, it is God who is my Pilot, King, and light to my path. without God running the show, then it is ALL aimless and meaningless.

start there friends.

.

So are you saying you believe that everyone who died in the towers on 9/11 was actually god's will?!!? .... because god thought is was "the best time to die" !??! Just off hand, that seems to make your view of things no different, and no better, than al Qaeda's view.

Either everyone dies on god's timetable, .... or they don't. Which is it?

 

[devildavid]

Hate to rain on this parade of positivity, but when people die seems absurd and meaningless to me. There is no such thing as the right time to die or our time being fulfilled just because we die. I take a darker view on the brevity of our lives and its absurdity. I rely on my stubbornness to keep going rather than the idea of fulfilling any purpose. We all cease to exist permanently and there is no positive spin that can be put on this. All we have is life and what we can squeeze out of it. Death is the great equalizer. None of us ultimately matter and there is no meaning to our deaths at all, only to the brief time we live and what meaning we choose to give it.

 

[devildavid]

So are you saying you believe that everyone who died in the towers on 9/11 was actually god's will?!!? .... because god thought is was "the best time to die" !??! Just off hand, that seems to make your view of things no different, and no better, than al Qaeda's view.

Either everyone dies on god's timetable, .... or they don't. Which is it?

There is no logic to religious logic. It is just 20/20 hindsight applied to everything that happens. It happened, therefore it must be part of god’s plan. Not exactly any intellectual heavy lifting going on.

 

[MamboDervish]

There is no logic to religious logic. It is just 20/20 hindsight applied to everything that happens. It happened, therefore it must be part of god’s plan. Not exactly any intellectual heavy lifting going on.

Indeed! I'm always tickled by how often and widespread the use of the word "miracle" comes up among the religious, even sometimes in newspaper headlines, but only in the context of something that is perceived as positive. For example, the deaths in a plane crash are never miracles, but the survivors always are. Such magical thinking always makes me laugh out loud. People never seem to examine their beliefs.

I vividly remember one such event more than 30 years ago when the headline on the NYPost was "MIRACLE BABY!", about an infant that was the sole survivor of a plane crash somewhere in South America. Needless to say, the Post didn't carry the followup story when, after suffering for roughly 30 more hours, the infant succumbed to it's wounds and died. That kind of "miracle" doesn't sell papers, or fit the religious narrative.

 

[Revelation]

So are you saying you believe that everyone who died in the towers on 9/11 was actually god's will?!!?

no, it wasn't God's will my friend.

if you go out to the Parking Lot and shoot yourself, is that 'God's will' ?......of course not, it was Your Will

.... because god thought is was "the best time to die" !??! Just off hand, that seems to make your view of things no different, and no better, than al Qaeda's view.

if you die in your sleep thru no fault of your own, then it probably was God's will. however if you are at fault in anyway, such as a tree falling on your that should have been taken down years ago falling on your bedroom, then i don't believe it was God's will.

Either everyone dies on god's timetable, .... or they don't. Which is it?

nope. too many details to wade thru i feel.

if you have an Industrial Accident, slip and fall, then prolly not God's will. sometimes the angels will save you in special cases.

 

[ataraxia]

What if it meant you kept aging, but just never died? I'm thinking life gets pretty grim by the time you hit 300 and you're looking like Yoda with leprosy.

Plus, what do you figure it's going to take to get one of your great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandkids to change your diaper?

What if you could have immortality with perfect health and beauty? What was that song: "Forever Young"? Stay 25 years old forever...

 

[devildavid]

What if you could have immortality with perfect health and beauty? What was that song: "Forever Young"? Stay 25 years old forever...

How would you know that you are immortal? What would it feel like? Perfect health and beauty would feel fine even if your weren’t immortal. But what does immortality really add to that if it can”t be felt? And what if everyone else was too? Being immortal and watching loved ones die would be terrible. I don’t get why religion tries to market itself using immortality a s a reward when no one would ever really be able to feel it.

 

[rjay]

It's a bit morbid, but is there an ideal age to die ?

Not today

 

[rjay]

The day you die is the good age to die.

Lees

In many, but not all cases, the day after would be better.

 

[ataraxia]

How would you know that you are immortal? What would it feel like? Perfect health and beauty would feel fine even if your weren’t immortal. But what does immortality really add to that if it can”t be felt? And what if everyone else was too? Being immortal and watching loved ones die would be terrible. I don’t get why religion tries to market itself using immortality a s a reward when no one would ever really be able to feel it.

Well, it’s the ideal that people want, and the standard they hold medical science and physicians to. Medical science is not going to stop until either it gets there or the price tag gets too expensive and society just gives up and says “that’s good enough”. Until then, medical costs are going to keep going up.

I know a 95 year old who eventually died under the care of their cardiologist, who had been caring for them for decades, and their family was all like “what did the doctor do wrong?”