Yet the same people who think it is ok to spank a 4 year old would NEVER think of spanking a 94 yr old parent that lives with them, has dementia, and is misbehaving in far worse ways than a 4 year old would.If you have to hit a 4 year old, you shouldn't be a parent.
My son is 9 and has been in wineries, bars, fancy restaurants, airplanes, trains, etc. He’s seen a LOT more of the world and experienced a lot more than I had at his age.
The “leash” days were from the time when he was a toddler and walking/running until he was about preK aged.
Where many people had their kids in strollers/wagons, etc as a toddler? We had a nifty little insulated backpack with a leash attached to it that clipped at his chest. He couldn’t wander off and get hurt - and he learned that Mom wasn’t a pack mule to carry his stuff around either
Zoo, aquariums, festivals, boardwalks, etc - the kiddo and I went to all of them real simply with me wearing a backpack and him wearing his backpack and go see and do whatever.
He learned by walking right next to me and us constantly talking - even when he would just be babbling along because he didn’t have verbal expression at that point - or was using his communication device.
Wagons/strollers, etc couldn’t work for us because my son didn’t have expressive language. We relied on the ability to have constant eye contact/use sign language, use facial expressions and body language. He understood ME - and I understood him.
Every parent has to find what works for them.
But I’ll never understand spanking and hitting a kid. I just don’t get it.
There are literally countless other ways to parent and discipline. If you wouldn’t accept being hit by your partner or your boss, why is it acceptable to hit your kid? Under any circumstances?
What does it really TEACH them?
Fine. No argument there. But to say kids need controlling or training is treating them no different than a dog. I think one of our posters on here already made that link. Dogs and children need training was the argument.You’re missing the point. All the posts saying I hit/never hit my kids and they turned out to be X ignores the rest of parenting and the impact it had on said children turning out to be X.
My kiddo and I have always gone practically everywhere togetherFunny thing, is that I used to privately snicker (my wife did, too) when we would see kids on leashes out in public. When we would later talk about it, we concluded that was just something we would never do with our own child.
Then, my daughter wandered away from my wife in a Gymboree store at the mall. The place was stuffed with racks of clothes and such, so you couldn’t see the little tot through everything. My wife went into a panic and the manager of the store lowered the gates to lockdown the store until she was hopefully found. She was scared to death that she had been abducted. She still says it was the worst scare she ever had. My daughter was innocently found back in a corner looking at hair sets and party shoes.
We changed our tune about those kid leashes, and we understood why some parents used them. Like anything else in this life, it was no longer a joke when it happens to you.
The same people who would ridicule you for leashing a child for SAFETLY reasons would spank their children to teach them a lesson. Odd how some people think.My kiddo and I have always gone practically everywhere together
That little backpack with the attached leash was our little “safety net” to make sure that if I was paying a clerk at a register, fishing around in my purse for a ringing phone, etc…a curious toddler couldn’t wander off and get lost.
I really didn’t care what anyone thought, it worked for us.
Today? He’s 9…and he’s usually really good at staying close in crowds.
Butwhen we go to crowded places with lots of people - baseball/football games, amusement parks, carnivals/festivals, the boardwalk, concerts, beaches at the Jersey shore, etc? It’s an AirTag - either in the shoe under his insole or in a little caribiner that gets tied in the inside of his swimsuit.
Because sometimes you can get separated. Life happens. He knows the rule - if we get separated - stand still - or if you get scared - find a nearby lifeguard/security guard/police officer and stand with them. Mom will find you because you have your AirTag.
I do a lot of solo parenting because of my husband’s work schedule andit works for us as a “fall back”
every kid is different - most need spankings/physical discipline of some kind
4 years old cannot logic/reason like an adult. They do understand do this = good, don't do this = a little physical pain
discipline early on means not having to do nearly as much later on IMO
It feel very fortunate that we found that ad on our son's daycare billboard when he was 4. I really think it made a big difference.Too often parenting classes are stigmatized as something bad parents have to take without realizing how much many parents could benefit. I don't mean to generalize but it seems to me like a vast majority of parents could use one of these courses. Even me, if I could go back. There's not much to prepare you for actually being a parent and then you only know how your parent's parented.
I didn't want my kids trained. Comparing the discipline of a child to that of a dog, JAYSUS!
THAT doesn't make it ok. What a sad argument to make. Do you think violence is acceptable against a wife, a senior, someone with development problems, against a neighbor or anyone else you get angry at?
Sorry for being harsh, but the mental image you have painted on what you believe is good parenting is frightening.
Yet the same people who think it is ok to spank a 4 year old would NEVER think of spanking a 94 yr old parent that lives with them, has dementia, and is misbehaving in far worse ways than a 4 year old would.
OR............. maybe those with that kind of mindset would consider spanking a 94 yr old with dementia.
yes.
i needed spanking very hard and with a good leather belt, sometimes daily. it used to tire my mother out and she wore out leather belts on me.
yep. start early and keep that paddle or belt coming at them until you see a real difference in behavior.
my dad used an electric cord on us once, and it stung very hard on all 3 of us. the screaming would have broke yur eardrums, but he believed the bible said this being the Best Way.
other forms of discipline didn't work to good on me.
blessings all. keep yur leather belts handy and the swatting a plenty. it tended to keep my memory fresh on the way things needed to be.
.
Yeesh, your arguments get more and more frightening. You are NOT defending yourself when a kid is misbehaving. Unless that kid is physically attacking you. We are talking about spanking and you are relating that to someone assaulting you so that you have to "defend yourself?"
The Apple AirTag idea is a really good one. Wish we would have had that technology 26 years ago.My kiddo and I have always gone practically everywhere together
That little backpack with the attached leash was our little “safety net” to make sure that if I was paying a clerk at a register, fishing around in my purse for a ringing phone, etc…a curious toddler couldn’t wander off and get lost.
I really didn’t care what anyone thought, it worked for us.
Today? He’s 9…and he’s usually really good at staying close in crowds.
Butwhen we go to crowded places with lots of people - baseball/football games, amusement parks, carnivals/festivals, the boardwalk, concerts, beaches at the Jersey shore, etc? It’s an AirTag - either in the shoe under his insole or in a little caribiner that gets tied in the inside of his swimsuit.
Because sometimes you can get separated. Life happens. He knows the rule - if we get separated - stand still - or if you get scared - find a nearby lifeguard/security guard/police officer and stand with them. Mom will find you because you have your AirTag.
I do a lot of solo parenting because of my husband’s work schedule andit works for us as a “fall back”
You compared spanking to defending yourself. Nuff said?You make it sound like every kid respects boundaries just because their parents tell them no or have them on a leash.
I'm not saying your defending yourself from your kid. I'm saying if your kid has zero experience with any sort of violence or aggression in life what happens when that violence or aggression comes to them?
I'm not saying your kid is the neighbor. I'm saying what happens when your kid is the adult and expects a leash or chat will protect them from that neighbor.
Hiting dogs and children can make you feel like a MAN.I also don't hit my dog, FWIW.
Fine. No argument there. But to say kids need controlling or training is treating them no different than a dog. I think one of our posters on here already made that link. Dogs and children need training was the argument.
No thanks.
You compared spanking to defending yourself. Nuff said?
No thanks.Aggression and violence are real things. They aren't to be shunned. They are to be taught, experienced and understood.
Once you go down that road to using physical punishment on kids, it's not a stretch to extend that form of discipline to other family members.Elder abuse is rampant. I'd like to see if there's a correlation between elder abuse and parents who spank their children.
I wouldn't want to hazard a guess. But let that kind of "discipline" come known to the authorities, and watch anyone using those forms of discipline being investigated and charged.Dear Lord. Sounds almost too frightening to be real. If this was real, I am so sorry.
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Once you go down that road to using physical punishment on kids, it's not a stretch to extend that form of discipline to other family members.
I KNOW you won't read any of the material in the following link:This is an actual logical fallacy called slippery slope.
If you have to hit a 4 year old, you shouldn't be a parent.
Dad used a belt and switch on me once of twice - I was a good kid, I didn't need much discipline thoughyes.
i needed spanking very hard and with a good leather belt, sometimes daily. it used to tire my mother out and she wore out leather belts on me.
yep. start early and keep that paddle or belt coming at them until you see a real difference in behavior.
my dad used an electric cord on us once, and it stung very hard on all 3 of us. the screaming would have broke yur eardrums, but he believed the bible said this being the Best Way.
other forms of discipline didn't work to good on me.
blessings all. keep yur leather belts handy and the swatting a plenty. it tended to keep my memory fresh on the way things needed to be.
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