Anyone who thinks that homosexuality poses no threat to great societies needs to take a lesson from history, because they obviously haven't read any. As most people know, roughly 50,000 years ago, the great Shavehighnee civilization came to dominate the known world. At the time, the 'known world' consisted of this tiny pond on the northern tip of Palestine, but that's unimportant. What is important is that they ruled for 1,000 years. And as the historical record shows, everyone was happy. While the Shavehighnees were at first hunter-gatherers, they quickly became agricultural with the rise of the first female ruler, Weredahellhaveubeenalnite Andontsey Outhuntin. History knows little of her, but of her daughter's life - Bitsch Kanntshuthermowth - we know a great deal. Among many of her great deeds, Bitsch is credited with bringing the practice of sexual abstinence to the Shavehighnees. Early art and sculpture flourished under her reign, both depicting female nudity to a great extent, and which cultural theory believes was shared among the sexually abstinent men in various households. It wasn't until the rise of Eyecantakke Discrazyhonomo that men gained power after 200 years of all female rule, and thus began the rise of the Fuggitwesahregonnadoeachother-Insted Dynasty. Most historians believe that the first homosexual acts in human nature took place during this period, and although no record currently exists to give creedence to such a belief, experts point to the various cultural changes taking place under his reign as proof. Art and sculpture improved drastically, and was no longer depicting only female nudity, but sweaty, well-toned men as well. Housing also improved, and interior design was no longer limited to only a bucket in the corner to poop in, as it had been for generations. Stale bread dipped in water had been a staple for generations; however, under Eyecantakke Discrazyhonomo, diets improved greatly with the introduction of sushi, cobb salad, and cafe lattes.
Unfortunately, all this cultural progression came at a price. The shamans and oracles, having held sway over the masses for almost 900 years, suddenly found themselves losing power at an alarming rate. The people were no longer content whipping themselves for existing; instead, they stopped all self-flaggelation, and started enjoying stuff - an act expressly forbidden by their religion. In a haste to stop the damage homosexuality was causing their once-great society, the religious caste quickly put together a holy book which condemned the act, and they filled the stories with all kinds of neat stuff like dragons, winged lobsters, and flaming chinchillas which spoke the word of their deities. Thinking that no one could argue with flaming chinchillas, they distributed this book among every household free of charge, and in the dead of night when everyone was sleeping so there would be no possibilities of any "no thank you, I rather enjoy life free from ya'lls bullhockey"'s. Then they patted themselves on the back for their quick thinking.
Unfortunately, the Shavehighnees had no idea about paper, so they used cobraskin instead. And perhaps they would have met with more success if they would have actually killed and skinned the cobras instead of simply writing passages along their snake bodies and tieing them together before throwing the angry serpents into dark houses where all the nice folks were sleeping, but who knows? All we do know is that the civilization rapidly ended, and all because of homosexuality.
Let's make sure America does not go the way of the Shavehighnees.