Hoarding

[American]

Anyone every watch the TV show on hoarding? It's astounding, but I actually under it a little. I use to be married to someone with a milder version of this problem (as compared to the cases shown on TV). It's horrible.

 

[winston53660]

Anyone every watch the TV show on hoarding? It's astounding, but I actually under it a little. I use to be married to someone with a milder version of this problem (as compared to the cases shown on TV). It's horrible.

I had a Great Aunt who did not take out the trash for roughly 30 years. And if she ordered something it was usually by the dozen. Say she ordered shoes...it would be by the dozen of the same pair...say she ordered a book...it would be a case of the same title..and on and on.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

Anyone every watch the TV show on hoarding? It's astounding, but I actually under it a little. I use to be married to someone with a milder version of this problem (as compared to the cases shown on TV). It's horrible.

I've worked with people like this. OCD to the extreme.

 

[American]

I've worked with people like this. OCD to the extreme.

It's frustrating and robs you of your wealth. My ex was not this bad, but not a hundred miles away either.

 

[winston53660]

It's frustrating and robs you of your wealth. My ex was not this bad, but not a hundred miles away either.

My great Aunt was actually extremely wealthy and died that way

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

It's frustrating and robs you of your wealth. My ex was not this bad, but not a hundred miles away either.

I've seen the show a couple of times. Very hard to watch people who are in THAT much pain and anxiety that they would destroy their lives like that.

 

[American]

I've seen the show a couple of times. Very hard to watch people who are in THAT much pain and axiety that they would destroy their lives like that.

I can honestly say I understand how it is to live with someone like that. The problem in our case was ebay. Ten years of ebay at about 200 purchases per year. That wasn't the end of it though, that was just ebay.

 

[TheGirlNextDoor]

I'm watching that right now. I've never known any hoarders and I have a hard time understanding how things get to that point. Plus.. a lot of the people they show, didn't always hoard... it's a problem that grows and grows? I don't understand.

 

[1069]

I am more the opposite extreme: I sometimes feel very oppressed by our material possessions and sweep through the house discarding them all.
We have a pretty small living space, and sometimes it gets to the point where I'd rather have the extra square foot of space than the object that's currently occupying it, no matter how useful it is or how much it cost.

This habit of mine bothers my husband.

 

[American]

I'm watching that right now. I've never known any hoarders and I have a hard time understanding how things get to that point. Plus.. a lot of the people they show, didn't always hoard... it's a problem that grows and grows? I don't understand.

Look, it's difficult to understand as a person who's lived with one. I still don't know WHY. It's not that she didn't find good deals, it's that she good dealed us to death.

 

[TheGirlNextDoor]

Look, it's difficult to understand as a person who's lived with one. I still don't know WHY. It's not that she didn't find good deals, it's that she good dealed us to death.

I'm not blaming, I just don't understand it. My son is OCD and had a very difficult time letting go of old toys (even toys that were broken) and even now, he wants to hang on to everything.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

Generally, hoarding behavior is a form of OCD. Most often this is related to anxiety, loss issues, grief issues, or feelings related to lack of safety. A traumatic event can sometimes trigger it. The hoarding behavior is a defense mechanism/dysfunctional coping skill that is used to deal with these feelings.

 

[1069]

I'm not blaming, I just don't understand it. My son is OCD and had a very difficult time letting go of old toys (even toys that were broken) and even now, he wants to hang on to everything.

That's different.
I did that when I was a kid, but it was because I anthropomorphized my toys to the point that I thought they had feelings, and I couldn't stand to hurt them by throwing them away (this must be relatively common among children, given the proliferation of children's books and movies in which toys actually are alive and possessed of the capacity to feel human emotion, and do feel pain and sadness when they're discarded, even when they're shabby and broken).

Maybe he was simply an extremely empathetic child.

 

[American]

Generally, hoarding behavior is a form of OCD. Most often this is related to anxiety, loss issues, grief issues, or feelings related to lack of safety. A traumatic event can sometimes trigger it. The hoarding behavior is a defense mechanism/dysfunctional coping skill that is used to deal with these feelings.

Maybe that's true, but it doesn't get very specific. And she's an LPC. Sad really, it was one of the single biggest issues between us.

 

[American]

I'm not blaming, I just don't understand it. My son is OCD and had a very difficult time letting go of old toys (even toys that were broken) and even now, he wants to hang on to everything.

I know you weren't, and I didn't mean to sound like I was scolding you. I was agreeing with you; that even someone close to it, still doesn't understand. She wouldn't deal with it, or even address it at all. It was either silent denial or excuses.

 

[UtahBill]

There is probably less of it now, due to depression era people dying off. If you can find an old relative who suffered through that period of our history, you will find it enlightening. When you come from having nothing, a little bit of extra stuff becomes a treasure to you.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

Maybe that's true, but it doesn't get very specific. And she's an LPC. Sad really, it was one of the single biggest issues between us.

It depends on the person. The issues that I mentioned are general as specifics are dependant on the individual.

 

[Orion]

Growing up my family had some pack-rat behaviours, but nothing that bad. I've been to homes where people hoard and it's actually disturbing. No really. It's not entertaining, amusing, or shocking, it's just really disturbing... mostly because when you meet the people who live there, they obviously have deep issues. The outer baggage symbolizes the inner.

My aunt was OCD but with cleaning. She always had to be doing house chores. The thing is, she wasn't ever really doing meaningful work in the house. She was just re-arranging things but not really getting rid of anything. It was like she was trying to work out an inner process, but instead was completely avoiding it.

The preview for the show was enough for me. I don't think I could gawk at these lost people for very long.

 

[American]

There is probably less of it now, due to depression era people dying off. If you can find an old relative who suffered through that period of our history, you will find it enlightening. When you come from having nothing, a little bit of extra stuff becomes a treasure to you.

I understand that completely and have seen it, on the other hand my parents lived through WWII and don't hoard anymore than what I think is reasonable (probably shouldn't call is hoarding).