Crazy political e-mail forwards

[Deuce]

We all have them.

Relatives who figure out our email addresses, and start forwarding every stupid fw:fw:fw: OMG CHECK THIS OUT that they get their hands on. You can't tell them to shut the **** up, because they're family.

It never ends.

Emphasis mine.

The Fix

There recently was an article in the St. Petersburg , Fl. Times. The Business Section asked readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this guy nailed it!

Dear Mr. President,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing America 's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them $1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new AMERICAN Car. Forty million cars ordered - Auto Industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members in Congress pay their taxes...

Mr. President, while you're at it, make Congress retire on Social Security and Medicare. I'll bet both programs would be fixed pronto!

If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know.
If not, please disregard.

The last two lines are pretty much standard. "Forward if you agree, but just delete it if you don't. Please don't try and form a rebuttal, there's probably gaping holes in my argument but I don't want them pointed out."

Our genius in St. Petersburg has an awesome idea. I mean, bam, fixing our economy just like that! Why bother with complicated bailouts and stimulus and tax breaks? It's so simple! It's amazing that nobody came up with this sooner! :lamo

edit: spoiler tags no work
Anyone want to guess at what our genius in St. Petersburg may have missed?

If you have any good ones, post them!

 

[MKULTRABOY]

No..... just.


no.

 

[Mach]

I know right? My dad always bombards me with these things. I'm left with no option either. Support them and I'm insane. Reject them and I'm picking a fight. Ignore them and I get questioned on why I'm not concerned about these VERY concerning things. It's such a lose/lose. And don't even get me started on when mom weighs in on my opposition to dad's view...

Only success I have is changing the subject ever so slightly so that I'm agreeing with something close...

 

[MKULTRABOY]

I get anti-chavista ones from grandma in Venezuela with articles of varying degrees of quality and authenticity. Sometimes I gotta roll my eyes. She treats the browsnies like untouchables. I luv her tho.

 

[Wiseone]

Right because those 40 Million people have skills, experience, relationships, and other necessary requirements that are mirrored perfectly by our unemployed workforce. Who are unemployed because they have these obviously employable job skills.

Its a novel idea but in the end is too simple, good for humor though.

 

[Deuce]

Right because those 40 Million people have skills, experience, relationships, and other necessary requirements that are mirrored perfectly by our unemployed workforce. Who are unemployed because they have these obviously employable job skills.

Its a novel idea but in the end is too simple, good for humor though.

Somebody didn't do the math.

This person has suggested we could fix all of our problems by spending forty trillion dollars.

 

[MKULTRABOY]

Somebody didn't do the math.

This person has suggested we could fix all of our problems by spending forty trillion dollars.

Sounds about right.

 

[Wiseone]

Somebody didn't do the math.

This person has suggested we could fix all of our problems by spending forty trillion dollars.

Ah I didn't catch that. Good eye.