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The "Gay" Voice

blackjack50

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So what is the deal with this stereotypical voice? I noticed today that a guy was speaking like this on the phone, and a few minutes later he mentioned his boyfriend. It is hardly "uncommon," but I'm sure we all know straight guys who speak with that "effeminate" voice as well.

Anyway. Anyone know what the deal is behind this? Is there a reason? Or do you think it is just a social construct and there is no stigma for gay men, and some men don't care, and thus they sound that way? Or do you think it is something else?

PS

Not all gay guys sound that way. I am aware. I am speaking specifically to the stereotype.
 
I have wondered the same on occasion. Three of my good friends are gay. One has the distinctly gay voice and mannerisms. One is kind of difficult to tell because he is deaf, but his hand movements are what is generally considered feminine. And the other wouldn't set off even the most advanced gaydar. What is interesting is the one with the gay voice talked that way even back before he knew he was gay.

I don't know what it is but human behavior is interesting.
 

I think the difference would be in "gay boys" and homosexual MEN.

I bought a cool video called the Alaska Experiment were several city slickers were sent out to Alaska for a month and had to get from point A to point B.

2/3 of the way through it was revealed one of the strongest characters was a homosexual MAN. He did not act the Hollywood stereotype nor talked like a " gay boy" either. He was a MAN who happened to be homosexual.

I have no idea why some prefer to behave like "gay boys", unless they are sexually submissive and want to advertise that fact.

History is full of real men who happen to also be homosexual. As a military man I do not care who they are screwing as long as they have my back and fight as hard as the rest of us.
 

A guy I went to high school with had very effeminate mannerisms and "the gay voice." We all assumed he was gay, but it turns out he's quite not. Yes, human behavior IS interesting.
 
The most flamboyant offenders probably put it on deliberately, or have some underlying psychological issue. I'm sorry, but no one talks like George Takei, or dresses like Boy George, by accident.

As to more subtle and generalized kinds of "effeminate" mannerisms, I'd buy that might be subconscious, or possibly even just natural. I actually have known a couple of gay guys who, even if you normally wouldn't be able to tell they were gay, would then turn around and display some rather jarringly "feminine" traits once you got to know them.

For example, I remember watching football with a gay friend of mine, who wasn't at all a "flamer." About half-way through, he started asking a bunch of really silly questions about how the game is played with basically the exact same mannerisms, tone of voice, and "I'm not really interested, but I'll act like I am to make you happy" attitude that you might expect to see from a female character in a sit-com. It actually kind of took me completely off-guard. Lol
 
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I would guess many people that speak like that just speak like that. I've known people both gay and straight that do. I couldn't tell you why. Perhaps it simply fit with the stereotype.
 
CLAX1911 said:
I would guess many people that speak like that just speak like that. I've known people both gay and straight that do. I couldn't tell you why. Perhaps it simply fit with the stereotype.
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It could be that it's stereotypical because so many gays talk like that, rather than vise versa.
 
CLAX1911 said:
I would guess many people that speak like that just speak like that. I've known people both gay and straight that do. I couldn't tell you why. Perhaps it simply fit with the stereotype.
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Sure. But I am a believe that some stereotypes exist for a reason. Not so much because it is a rule. Just a common ...theme? I mean you can tell if someone is white and southern by an accent right? But it isn't a guarantee.
 
No chance it's just a social construct, why to get beat up more? Studies have shown a link even early in childhood

It's probably some combination of enculturation, and one of the contributing factors of homosexuality such as hormones in the womb may very well be linked to more effeminate behavior. Why do some heterosexuals display this behavior too? After all, about half of targets of gay bashing are actually not gay. Maybe they receive the hormones but don't have the genetic combination to turn out gay. This is all highly theoretical so long as we don't have a way to measure these things
 
blackjack50 said:
Sure. But I am a believe that some stereotypes exist for a reason. Not so much because it is a rule. Just a common ...theme? I mean you can tell if someone is white and southern by an accent right? But it isn't a guarantee.
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I think in the past, the stereotype seemed indisputable because those who were not effeminate would never come out in the first place. That stereotype still lingers, reflected by the gay characters on tv. It makes sense even in a non prejudiced way. If like in the OP's scenario, you overhear two gay guys talking in say the grocery line and one of them is acting like the stereotype, guess which you will assume is gay and will reinforce that stereotype

Unless they start making out, then that can make you rethink everything
 

One of my best friends that pulls lots of chicks has an effeminate sounding voice and mannerisms. Absolutely positive he isn't gay, but I still don't get it.

My little brother was gay, and he started adopting the effeminate mannerisms when he was literally a child. It wasn't much of a shocker when he came out of the closet.
 

The irony is that I was just thinking this at work yesterday, when a donator came in using that stereotypical voice.
 
RAMOSS said:
It could be that it's stereotypical because so many gays talk like that, rather than vise versa.
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I don't even think it's that. I believe the stereotype was generated by the idea that homosexual males are effeminate. That idea comes in to play IMO because generally straight men think that a man would have to be effeminate in order to attract another man.

I really came to this opinion first because the "gay voice" is not stereotypical among gay males. The truth is actually contrary to that.

Secondly because when I started dating my partner my straight friends would ask us which one plays the female role. To wit I'd scratch my head and look over at my SO and he'd be as confused as I was, then I'd explain we are both men there is no need for a female role. Then they would ask who is the submissive one in the relationship, again I'd explain neither one of us.

Anecdotes aside, what I'm getting at is that the stereotype was born out of heteronormative concepts of relations between two people. There had to be the girly guys because that's what the manly guys want, and that is absolutely not the case.
 
blackjack50 said:
Sure. But I am a believe that some stereotypes exist for a reason. Not so much because it is a rule. Just a common ...theme? I mean you can tell if someone is white and southern by an accent right? But it isn't a guarantee.
Click to expand...
I understand my post was rather vague. That is what I was saying. The stereotype was created because people liked it.

See post 15 for a deeper explanation.
 
Kobie said:
A guy I went to high school with had very effeminate mannerisms and "the gay voice." We all assumed he was gay, but it turns out he's quite not. Yes, human behavior IS interesting.
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I had the same experience at a job. a customer that would come in regularly. He dressed well, was outgoing, he had the same effeminate mannerisms both in speech and body language. But then one day his wife and two kids came in with him and he and his wife were very hand holdy and cuddly so.. yea like you said.. it is interesting.
 
I had a gay real estate agent who was on the team during my 4 1/2 year stint working for a broker. Please keep in mind that I fully accept gay folks...I just don't care care and never have. But, this guy was a freaking loon!

He used to whine about everything I did from missing sign riders, flyers missing, flyer boxes, property pictures, etc. etc.

I never had a complaint from any of the 23 agents in the office during my time there. Many of them gave me nice tips after a closing.

One day, he comes up to my desk while I am grinding keys for a property, and starts going off like Mt. St. Helen in front of the entire office about 1 property that was missing flyers.

He placed both hands on his hips and did this weird gyrating thing like a woman usually does, and continued shrieking for 2-3 minutes. The entire office just sat there red faced and thinking oh..oh!

I let him finish his tantrum without saying a word.

When he finally finished, I told him that I always wondered what his position was in his relationship, but that I am glad that he cleared that up for me. I told him my wife acted the same way that very morning when I screwed up by cutting the lawn too short last night.



Even my boss, had to laugh at that one.
 

What a persnickity person.
 

If you had Takei's voice you damn well know you'd talk like that.
 
Deuce said:
If you had Takei's voice you damn well know you'd talk like that.
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Ohhh Myyyyy!

George is hardly the stereotypical gay voice. For that matter it is damn sexy. There are few men I would be willing to admit that about, but George (whom both me and my first wife have met on separate occasions. He's a blast!), Sean Connery, and James Earl Jones are right at the top.
 

George could probably talk me into bed. I wish I had his voice lol.
 

The simplest answer is some guys develop it as a way to broadcast they are gay so that other gay guys will notice them since there would be no other obvious way aside from asking; which could get you punched if you ask the wrong person.
 

I'mma be crude here and explain it how a Navy chief once told us...

"You know why gay men have a lisp? The male mouth wasn't built to suck d***, thus if you do so a few times it changes shape and that's why queers have lisps!"


I know, I know, crude.
 
The title of this thread sounds like a magical or inborn super power only gay men have.
'Randall seduced Jack with "The Gay Voice," even though Jack was straight.'

Sorry, had to say it.
 
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