I think of it this way: things have a way of coming together to create things greater than the sum of their parts. It doesn't mean the end result had some pre-existing "essence" that only now is becoming realized.
For example: a car is really just a bunch of metal, plastic, leather, rubber, etc... But put together, qualities emerge from it that do not exist in its components separately. That doesn't mean a car has any sort of "soul" or essence".
Similarly, a hurricane is just composed of air and water. And yet, when placed under certain contingent conditions, it develops certain properties and it does things that the individual components by themselves do not have. It doesn't mean there is some deep underlying essence of "hurricane" that is being realized.
Now the question you ask has very deep philosophical roots. It goes back to plato, and his idea of "essences", or ideal forms, which exist separate from and in a plane which transcends the physical world, and only manifests itself, even if imperfectly, in the physical forms. This eventually got transformed to the Christian concept of "soul". Later in the Renaissance and Enlightenment, as the world secularized more, this led to the concept of "humanism".
But nowadays, the concept of the self is moving away from even this concept of "humanism", to "post-humanism". If you are interested in all the philosophical history of all this, you might find these videos interesting (if you're going to listen to them, listen to them in the order below. It's hard to understand one without having listened to the prior ones):