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Your fav sayings, includes ones that you claim as your own

I’ve heard these;
Proper planning prevents piss poor performance.
Proper planning prevents particularly poor performance. (G rated)
Prior proper planning prevent piss poor performance.

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"I don't object to the concept of a deity, but I'm baffled by the notion of one that takes attendance." - Amy Farrah Fowler (Mayim Bialik - Big Bang Theory)

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A toast that I've heard and have given when out drinking with a buddy that's about to or just had a child.


"Here's to the storks that bring good babies, the crows that bring bad babies, and the swallows that bring no babies at all"
 
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell, my blessing season this in thee!

-William Shakespeare, Hamlet
 
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.

I don't think we are in Kansas any more.
 
more puzzling than funny whenever a family member uttered it:

hello dick damn
 
Mine:

Patience Comes To One Who Waits.


Moi
 
Your fav sayings, links if you have them, and includes ones that you claim as your own
Add your own.

Mine
3 things one notices when growing old (male perspective)

Winters get longer

Summers get shorter

Women get prettier

Jump in the waters warm
It doesn't cost a nickel to be friendly.
 
Remember, for every silver lining there is a dark cloud. (self authored).

A wet rat never walks on sand. (friend authored)

You can't seduce a bear with lettuce (friend authored)

Don't ever wrestle with a pig - the pig likes it and you only get dirty (G.B. Shaw?).
 
Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.
Socrates

Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

There's a hard life for every silver spoon
There's a touch of grey for every shade of blue
That's the way that I see life
If there was nothing wrong
Then there'd be nothing right.
 
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Gladly, the cross-eyed bear.
Life is hard, then you die.
The opinions of fools do not matter.
The difference between a wise man and a fool is the wise man knows he's a fool.
He has the mental acuity of a small, green soap dish.
I will not have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.
Happiness is an act of will.
There are many great men in history. There are some good men in history. There are very few great and good men in history.
History is the lies and myths we all agree to tell ourselves and to believe.
All matter and energy is music caused by vibrating strings; the universe is a grand symphony. When I have gas, I am the horn section.
Today's fools are the pioneers of tomorrow's common sense.
Fools rush in where even heroes fear to tread and thus become the greatest heroes of all.
When I look into the flushing toilet, I see the galaxy full of dark matter.
Cows are evil.
 
Weird one because it only works in a Maritimes Accent

"Have you ever been to India get that in to yah" *Points at the rum
 
I walked a mile with Pleasure,
She chatted all the way
But left me none the wiser,
For all she had to say.

I walked a mile with Sorrow,
And ne'er a word said she
But oh, the things I learned from her,
When Sorrow walked with me.
-Robert Browning Hamilton

Opportunity knocks but once, while temptation leans on the doorbell.

You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

Only brush the teeth you want to keep.
 
To guys and girls with crazy colored hair: “Cool. You are letting your natural color grow out!”
Age: “It’s not that you are getting old, it’s just that there are more people younger than you!” When did children start driving tractor trailer rigs!
 
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