Women are contributing to their engagement ring.

[CLAX1911]

Women Now Paying for Their Own Engagement Rings - The Cut

I thought this was an interesting social enigma. Traditionally men would purchase an engagement ring with three months of their income. It's really interesting to me that women have taken to picking out helping purchase and even purchasing their own engagement ring. But then again I have seen people pay more for a ring than they do for a brand new car.

What do you think?

 

[Henrin]

The man should buy it.

Oh and the poll should be public.

 

[lizzie]

I think that these days, that's probably to be expected, and a normal societal change. At my age, I would still expect the man to buy the engagement ring, but that's because I come from another generation, in which men were generally considered to be the bread-winners.

 

[Lutherf]

Are you friggin' kidding me!!!??

What kind of nutless wonder lets his soon to be wife chip in for the ring?

 

[Aunt Spiker]

Women Now Paying for Their Own Engagement Rings - The Cut

I thought this was an interesting social enigma. Traditionally men would purchase an engagement ring with three months of their income. It's really interesting to me that women have taken to picking out helping purchase and even purchasing their own engagement ring. But then again I have seen people pay more for a ring than they do for a brand new car.

What do you think?

The idea of having to spend a lot of money for one is absurd, for one thing. I never liked the concept and I'm glad my husband didn't do that (he would have if he was able to afford it, though. So I was saved by us being flat broke).

But, whomever is proposing should do all of that before proposing, you would think, and have it ready as a surprise. So I imagine that the tradition of surprising someone with a proposal is fading away, if they're discussing it ahead of time.

 

[CLAX1911]

The idea of having to spend a lot of money for one is absurd, for one thing. I never liked the concept and I'm glad my husband didn't do that (he would have if he was able to afford it, though. So I was saved by us being flat broke).

But, whomever is proposing should do all of that before proposing, you would think, and have it ready as a surprise. So I imagine that the tradition of surprising someone with a proposal is fading away, if they're discussing it ahead of time.

I surprised my spouse with an "engagement ring" but he is a man and not interested in pretty rocks so it was a simple silver band with an inscription on the inside. He wasn't able to get me a ring because he was completely broke. He purchased one for me some years later, when he could afford such a thing, a simple pewter band with a heartfelt inscription inside.

I was fascinated by this though, often times women are particular about jewelery.

 

[sbrettt]

I plan on paying for it, but I couldn't care less what other people do.

 

[lizzie]

Are you friggin' kidding me!!!??

What kind of nutless wonder lets his soon to be wife chip in for the ring?

The modern man? Give me a he-man any day of the week. :lol:

 

[Gathomas88]

I think men should still be expected pay for the ring under normal circumstances, and I would probably insist on doing so if I had the money to spend. However, I don't see any particular problem with a woman chipping in if she wants or if the man proposing happens to be too poor to afford an engagement ring on his own and the couple decides that they simply have to have one anyway regardless of the expense.

It's sort of a silly tradition in the first place, honestly. Diamond rings are freakishly expensive in today's economy, and serve next to no practical purpose whatsoever.

 

[lizzie]

I think men should still be expected pay for the ring under normal circumstances, and I would probably insist on doing so if I had the money to spend. However, I don't see any particular problem with a woman chipping in if she wants or if the man proposing happens to be too poor to afford an engagement ring on his own and the couple decides that they simply have to have one anyway regardless of the expense.

It's sort of a silly tradition in the first place, honestly. Diamond rings are freakishly expensive in today's economy, and serve next to no practical purpose whatsoever.

You are right in that they aren't practical at all, it's just symbolic, and you know us women- we're suckers for symbolic gestures. :lol:

 

[CLAX1911]

I think men should still be expected pay for the ring under normal circumstances, and I would probably insist on doing so if I had the money to spend. However, I don't see any particular problem with a woman chipping in if she wants or if the man proposing happens to be too poor to afford an engagement ring on his own and the couple decides that they simply have to have one anyway regardless of the expense.

It's sort of a silly tradition in the first place, honestly. Diamond rings are freakishly expensive in today's economy, and serve next to no practical purpose whatsoever.

I find diamonds very plain, if i were to buy a bejeweled ring for a spouse I would be very tempted to buy an emerald or a ruby. But then again I am off the beaten path.

 

[lizzie]

I find diamonds very plain, if i were to buy a bejeweled ring for a spouse I would be very tempted to buy an emerald or a ruby. But then again I am off the beaten path.

I had a really nice aquamarine in mine, at my own request.

 

[Gathomas88]

You are right in that they aren't practical at all, it's just symbolic, and you know us women- we're suckers for symbolic gestures. :lol:

My parents were rather poor when they first got married, so they did without until they got a bit better situated in their thirties.

All good things to those who wait. :mrgreen:

 

[Lutherf]

The modern man? Give me a he-man any day of the week. :lol:

I swear.....it's generally not a secret if you're broke so you get a ring you can reasonably afford and do the best you can. Later in life you can get the one that says "WE made it and I couldn't have done it without you, sweetheart."

 

[lizzie]

My parents were rather poor when they first got married, so they did without until they got a bit better situated in their thirties.

All good things to those who wait. :mrgreen:

That makes perfect sense to me. I wanted the aquamarine, not because he couldn't afford a diamond, but because I love aquamarine stones. Then, on Valentines Day, about 5 years ago, he bought me a diamond band, and surprised the hell out of me. He never was one to wear jewelry at all. I have worn that diamond band since his death, but this thread has inspired me to go dig out that original ring that I loved so much.

 

[CLAX1911]

You are right in that they aren't practical at all, it's just symbolic, and you know us women- we're suckers for symbolic gestures. :lol:

That is true. I have a neighbor in her late seventies, she is a widow and has been for about 18 years. Evan and I will cook for her and visit with her once or twice a week and Chris mows her grass. She has the engagement ring that her late husband have her in 1954 when she looks at it on her hand I see her doing that when she talks about him, she does so with what I imagine to be the same love she had when she was 19

 

[CLAX1911]

I had a really nice aquamarine in mine, at my own request.

I bet that is lovely. I love gems and precious stones but have no taste for jewelery. My spouse is a very plain person, so I simply like to look.

 

[Gipper]

I'd buy the ring. Fortunately, lab-created diamonds are very affordable these days.

 

[Thrilla]

Women Now Paying for Their Own Engagement Rings - The Cut

I thought this was an interesting social enigma. Traditionally men would purchase an engagement ring with three months of their income. It's really interesting to me that women have taken to picking out helping purchase and even purchasing their own engagement ring. But then again I have seen people pay more for a ring than they do for a brand new car.

What do you think?

I'm of an older generation.. so I bought my wife her ring.... it's how we did it, and still do to a large extent.

...and I really don't care who buys the rings today, or whose last name is taken, or any of the particulars...their engagement/wedding/marriage is none of my business.

 

[digsbe]

I've heard of some couples only buying a gold band and having a diamond put on before the ceremony. Also, I found this funny.

 

[lizzie]

I've heard of some couples only buying a gold band and having a diamond put on before the ceremony. Also, I found this funny.

Funny, but so so sad.

 

[CLAX1911]

I've heard of some couples only buying a gold band and having a diamond put on before the ceremony. Also, I found this funny.

Well it does seem a but selfish and contradictory. The irony is delicious though

 

[Gathomas88]

God, I hate the preening hippie douchebag in that picture. Has anyone ever been able to definitely figure out whether it's a guy or a girl? :lol:

 

[lizzie]

God, I hate the preening hippie douchebag in that picture. Has anyone ever been able to definitely figure out whether it's a guy or a girl? :lol:

I think it's a girl, based on the mouth and the nose.

 

[Gathomas88]

I think it's a girl, based on the mouth and the nose.

Based upon those factors, and the complexion of the skin, I'd be inclined to agree. However, the flatness of the chest, the square jaw, and the unusually broad nature of the head in general kind of make me have to second guess myself a bit. :lol: