Well he is at drinking school and he smoked weed a bunch before he went ROTC, on that front I suspect Jealousy. And the bankruptcy..... that is tied into trying to start a business, which he worked in, which he got to see me run (often well), which he wanted to run after he gets done with an Army career, so its complicated. We never told him that we were in trouble, he came back from 6 weeks in Italy for school and got told that we were closing in a week. He felt blindsided for sure, like we had not been honest with him, which we were not, and there was a reason but that was wrong. The choices that he does not respect are not wanting a career and being a stay at home dad, that does not compute for him. But he is OK with women in the military, he thinks if you are going to have kids then a parent should be home with them at least part time...which does not compute for me, because it has to be the husband who does that, so why is it a failing on my part to want to do that?.
The real life people tell me that the only thing to do is keep working on it, trying to keep the lines of communication open, that he likely will come around in time, at least to talk about it. I am just a little thrown because I never expected this age to be difficult for us. My dad died when I was 24, with us never having much of a relationship, so my personal experiences are coming up short at the moment so far as a fix or a prognosis goes , thus my query here......
