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Well, I finally faced hate. A personal story.

Renae

Banned
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DP Veteran
Joined
Aug 26, 2007
Messages
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Location
San Antonio Texas
Gender
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Political Leaning
Conservative
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Sorry to hear that
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Man, people suck. I'm sorry Renae. Is there any chance of finding an LGBTQ friendly league in your area?
 
Man, people suck. I'm sorry Renae. Is there any chance of finding an LGBTQ friendly league in your area?

Yeah, it's gonna be the way it seems. My two good friends, who I was gonna be their alternate, but there was a team with an open slot. WE're gonna do a league this summer. I'm just really irked atm
 
Yeah, it's gonna be the way it seems. My two good friends, who I was gonna be their alternate, but there was a team with an open slot. WE're gonna do a league this summer. I'm just really irked atm

I would be too, Renae.

I was just hoping for an alternative to trying to bowl with another group of haters.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

You are Renae. No hate of theirs can ever change that.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

sorry for the painful rejection
but they also revealed to you who they are

find other bowlers who are not so backward
don't allow those assholes to deprive you of enjoying a sport you love
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

I'm sorry to hear this. All I can say is if you didn't know them before you joined the team then try not to let their rejection hurt you now. Consider it their loss. In any case, do you really want to associate with people who can't accept you on your terms? Ask yourself as well if perhaps another dynamic may have contributed to the rejection. I mean, they got to know you as "him," apparently expecting you to bowl as "him," but then you lowered the boom on them and altered their expectation. I can see why they may have taken exception to that. I can imagine that at a macho, competitive bowling league, where guys congregate to, um, swing their balls, so to speak, an insistence that a team member bowl as "her" might be met with the same sort of reception she would receive if she started waiving an ACLU membership card at a Klan rally. If you really enjoyed their company and your time in this league then perhaps a better approach would have been to complete the season as "him" before taking the next step.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

I'm sorry you got a taste of what true ignorance looks like. It's terrible to feel marginalized, and hated. Especially by cowards who couldn't even say it to your face.

I used to get picked on alot for being smart. I come from a real po dunk town full of white supremacists. And I had this one teacher after a particular bad day, who came to me and said:

"Why are you letting them make you feel bad about yourself, they are the idiots that have to pick on others to make themselves feel better about being idiots."

And I realized that day, that's all ignorance is, idiots attacking so they don't feel inferior to something they don't understand.

Learn from this Renae, it'll make you a better person, and show you where your true friends and allies are.
 
Learn from this Renae, it'll make you a better person, and show you where your true friends and allies are.

Hey, I'd be her friend. It's a plus that she's a conservative and a veteran, but not a requirement. :2wave:
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Ya cant fix stupid or bigotry....best to just move on in life without them, and leave them behind with the rest of the dinosaurs.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.
Don't give them power by dwelling on them. If they can't 'deal' with it then that's their problem, not yours. I say form a team of your own and kick their asses.
 
That blows. Being rejected for who you are always sucks. But you are in some very good company,
 
Thank you all, I'm in a down place tonight. It sucks, it's stupid. I tried to do the right thing, and slowly introduce myself, and explain who and where I was in life and where I am going. One of the guys, has his mom bowling with us, SHE is the one I know that had the big problem. **** them.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Sorry to hear this.
Some people are ****ty human beings......most people are decent folks.
You can only move forward and try to meet the decent people.
Good luck.
 
Sorry to hear this Renae.

It should not be this way but then again I am not surprised it is happening. I hope you find a more accepting group, I am sure they are out there.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Don't let it get to you. It's there problem, not yours.

.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

That really sucks. Sorry to hear that. :(

Hope your getting through it okay.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Really sorry to hear that. How you find a more accepting group.
 
That really sucks. Sorry to hear that. :(

Hope your getting through it okay.

Just bummed atm. I was finally getting me roll down, was ready to do this... meh. Ignorant peeps gotta steal that. Right now I'm in the "how do I exact revenge" phase.
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

Being denied the company of ignorant bigots is not really such a bad thing. The fact that they also appeared to lack the balls to reject your "application" in person further amplifies their lack of character. While social rejection hurts - you will, no doubt, find better company soon.
 
Just bummed atm. I was finally getting me roll down, was ready to do this... meh. Ignorant peeps gotta steal that. Right now I'm in the "how do I exact revenge" phase.
~ Actually you had to find out at some point - a sneaky rude way tells you they are not who you should be with.
Try not to think revenge - just understanding they are that way for a reason. As the saying goes - "They have issues". Don't let their shortcomings make you a vengeful person. You'll be fine in time ...:2wave:
 
So, I have been on a bowling team, since I didn't know the people "he" went, it's not easy and I didnt' like it but he bowled. They were told I was trans, but I let the league get used to me. Finally I said Renae would be bowling. AFTER I LEFT, the team said they were not going to bowl with me on the team.

I got the call after I got home.

I am so, so hurt right now.

I'm probably going to get flamed, but...... Out of curiosity, why do you perceive their not wanting to bowl with you as "hate"? Maybe your sexuality issues goes against their beliefs. If so, what is wrong with that? Just because someone doesn't agree with you does not make it hate. Why are they not allowed to choose who they want to spend time with?
 
I still find it surprising that people bowl after High School.
 
Just bummed atm. I was finally getting me roll down, was ready to do this... meh. Ignorant peeps gotta steal that. Right now I'm in the "how do I exact revenge" phase.

Doing best is the best revenge, so I have learned. It's doesn't sound like the team you were in were good friends anyway, so like you said **** them. My hope is you can find a league and team that better suits you then just kick butt, drink some beer, and have fun!
 
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