MickB
Banned
- Joined
- Feb 25, 2007
- Messages
- 243
- Reaction score
- 14
- Gender
- Male
- Political Leaning
- Very Conservative
Labour's premier freedom-fighter Johnathan Leftwinger MP gives you, the Public, a history lesson to keep you all learned-up about the Leftie future!
______________________________________________
FROM THE LEFTWINGER ARCHIVE OF RED WISDOM AND PURITY: An MP Writes
As even the Public will have cottoned onto by now, I am a man of integrity, deep-seated morality and honesty. And in order to keep the equilibrium of our Leftist tail-wagging-the-dogism (to give it my fancy new name), I insist on communicating my new ideas and ethical logistics to the Prime Minister directly. I'm just that humble.
In order to endear myself fully to everybody in the land (except bigots), I wish to tell you about my younger days. I hope that new Leftwinger-wannabes will seek true enlightenment through these web-pages, finding inspiration, gaining a full education of life and growing in knowledge and wisdom. And that's me, mate! I mean, after all, in the Labour Party we always find ourselves knowing what the Public don't know about, which is why we have to educate them at every stage of the way. (And you'd think they'd be grateful).
Even when I was a boy I seemed to have a wide knowledge of general issues. I was always telling my parents what to do, which annoyed them greatly, but like so many of the Public they just wouldn't be told. Mind you, to empathise for a while, I suppose the shame of always having their errors continuously pointed out by a mere child would have frustrated them. (I know I wouldn't like to be humilated. If anyone did that to me I'd rage and yell, I have to say). Ahead of my time, that was me.
I mean, for God's sake, I got no credit, did I? And so, Mum and Dad, the boot's on the other foot now isn't it mate?! You always went on about my failures at school, but that hasn't dented my success or character has it? I'm the MP now while you're still grafting at that poxy shoe shop, which just proves it! You ought to listen to Pink Floyd's The Wall! You'll learn more from that than from any school, or at least that's what I found.
And so, after all your years of abuse of whining and moaning instead of nurturing me, you get no special favours in return, I have to say. You can join the mass-ranks of the bloody Public, you're just as bad.
And it's not as if the schools were any good anyway. That's why so many of my backbench colleagues voted against Tony Blair's betrayal of our new socialist principles. I mean, bloody hell, by daring to draft a bill which would seek to end the current monopoly of 'lowest common denominator education' policy he was playing Ludo with our childrens' futures! I mean, he boggles the mind! Well, we taught him a lesson though. The ultimate wisdom of backbench Labour MPs won in the end. THE TRUTH HURTS MR. BLAIR!!!!!!
Anyway, back to me. I admire Tony Crossland. Such a Labour visionary. He wanted to close down "every f****** Grammar School", which just proves it. And I went to Public School, which was higher up the depravity ladder. I mean, the elite go, which is why I went there (fate really), but to call it 'Public' still burns in even now mate!
I had such a hard time trying to learn in that atmosphere. 'Standards', was it? Dictatorship and filling your head with so-called facts, that's my expose mate! Teachers teach you their lies and distortions you know. And now we're doing that in return, particularly to State-educated children, in regards to our own, real, TRUE values and ethics. It's called COUNTER-BALANCE mate!
And that's why, on the backbenches, we rebelled against the Toff-educationed traitors. Don't know what we know, that's what they don't know we know, but we do know mate! And so I dropped out of that pseudo-SS hellhole mate. It distorted my mind, so I had to escape. Of course, my parents were annoyed, telling me how they had scrimped and saved to get me to that place. Mind you, I told them that as it was just such a waste of time that I was bound to have failed anyway. AND SHE BLOODY CRIED! Dad wasn't much better. Badly behaved parents don't inspire you with confidence. Waste of chromosomes, that's what they were, and they haven't learned. If it wasn't for the fact that they were needed in order to produce me, I wouldn't even give them houseroom. Failures, that's what they are. White man's legacy mate. They don't talk to me any more, probably through jealousy of my own success.
These days, of course, my days of depravity at that prison camp are long gone. Ive put it behind me for good and I have moved on, as you know. And in case you wondered, it was a conscious effort on my part not to mention the name of the school. THAT WOULD ADVERTISE THOSE FASCISTS! They should suffer in anonymity. I even boycott the bloody Boat Race, that should show them up.
By my late-teens I attended a normal college with normal rebels. A more healthy environment of long hair, squatting and free love. For the first time I knew what Cold Turkey was and what an STD clinic looked like from the inside. That's your University of Life there.
Indeed, due to my insight I set up the JOHNATHAN LEFTWINGER REACTIONARY MOVEMENT, an on-campus reform squad. However, I thought that the word Reactionary was the same as Revolutionary, so once I changed the name I started to have members. (It may seem as if I'm making myself look weak and inferior by exposing my mistakes, but as this was the very first mistake I had ever made then I see no harm in mentioning it. Shows my famous humilty mate!).
Indeed, once the other members of the movement told me exactly how to go about doing it, I BECAME A PIONEER IN THE STUDENT REBEL MOVEMENT MATE! We shouted, held strikes over wars and things (poxy Yanks!), set fire to dustbins and had ever so much fun.
My 1981 student shout/sit-ins were legendary. Even though I left the college in 1969, my enthusiasm was far from dampened. I threw paint at fascist lecturers, stones at the other ones and jumped up and down and ranted at the top of my voice, speaking up for student concerns. Even when the police came (more fascists) I Would Not Be Moved. I nearly got sectioned, but it was all worth it for Student Rights!
Well, that was the beginning of the Leftwinger Revolution. I'm ever so dedicated, even today. I keep in touch with other students (wanting to destroy The System from within by becoming bank managers or Tories) and I've got every John Lennon album! Just proves it!
These days my my movement has evolved (not that it wasn't perfect from Day One) into the JOHNATHAN LEFTWINGER FOUNDATION FOR THE IMPROVEMENT OF PERSONS ('MAN' is too sexist). We meet every Wednesday at Leftwinger Towers, which is for now the back of the NCP car park as I'm having a tassle with local government over having my own building. You'd think they'd support Labour!
So all you proper people out there can still talk (and act) against Fascists, the Public and Parents alike, every Wednesday, GUARANTEED! (Mind, I don't bother if it's raining, stands to reason).
LET'S GET THE REVOLUTION CONCLUDED! WE ARE RIGHT AND EVERYONE ELSE IS WRONG! VOTE LABOUR!
______________________________________________
FROM THE LEFTWINGER ARCHIVE OF RED WISDOM AND PURITY: An MP Writes
As even the Public will have cottoned onto by now, I am a man of integrity, deep-seated morality and honesty. And in order to keep the equilibrium of our Leftist tail-wagging-the-dogism (to give it my fancy new name), I insist on communicating my new ideas and ethical logistics to the Prime Minister directly. I'm just that humble.
In order to endear myself fully to everybody in the land (except bigots), I wish to tell you about my younger days. I hope that new Leftwinger-wannabes will seek true enlightenment through these web-pages, finding inspiration, gaining a full education of life and growing in knowledge and wisdom. And that's me, mate! I mean, after all, in the Labour Party we always find ourselves knowing what the Public don't know about, which is why we have to educate them at every stage of the way. (And you'd think they'd be grateful).
Even when I was a boy I seemed to have a wide knowledge of general issues. I was always telling my parents what to do, which annoyed them greatly, but like so many of the Public they just wouldn't be told. Mind you, to empathise for a while, I suppose the shame of always having their errors continuously pointed out by a mere child would have frustrated them. (I know I wouldn't like to be humilated. If anyone did that to me I'd rage and yell, I have to say). Ahead of my time, that was me.
I mean, for God's sake, I got no credit, did I? And so, Mum and Dad, the boot's on the other foot now isn't it mate?! You always went on about my failures at school, but that hasn't dented my success or character has it? I'm the MP now while you're still grafting at that poxy shoe shop, which just proves it! You ought to listen to Pink Floyd's The Wall! You'll learn more from that than from any school, or at least that's what I found.
And so, after all your years of abuse of whining and moaning instead of nurturing me, you get no special favours in return, I have to say. You can join the mass-ranks of the bloody Public, you're just as bad.
And it's not as if the schools were any good anyway. That's why so many of my backbench colleagues voted against Tony Blair's betrayal of our new socialist principles. I mean, bloody hell, by daring to draft a bill which would seek to end the current monopoly of 'lowest common denominator education' policy he was playing Ludo with our childrens' futures! I mean, he boggles the mind! Well, we taught him a lesson though. The ultimate wisdom of backbench Labour MPs won in the end. THE TRUTH HURTS MR. BLAIR!!!!!!
Anyway, back to me. I admire Tony Crossland. Such a Labour visionary. He wanted to close down "every f****** Grammar School", which just proves it. And I went to Public School, which was higher up the depravity ladder. I mean, the elite go, which is why I went there (fate really), but to call it 'Public' still burns in even now mate!
I had such a hard time trying to learn in that atmosphere. 'Standards', was it? Dictatorship and filling your head with so-called facts, that's my expose mate! Teachers teach you their lies and distortions you know. And now we're doing that in return, particularly to State-educated children, in regards to our own, real, TRUE values and ethics. It's called COUNTER-BALANCE mate!
And that's why, on the backbenches, we rebelled against the Toff-educationed traitors. Don't know what we know, that's what they don't know we know, but we do know mate! And so I dropped out of that pseudo-SS hellhole mate. It distorted my mind, so I had to escape. Of course, my parents were annoyed, telling me how they had scrimped and saved to get me to that place. Mind you, I told them that as it was just such a waste of time that I was bound to have failed anyway. AND SHE BLOODY CRIED! Dad wasn't much better. Badly behaved parents don't inspire you with confidence. Waste of chromosomes, that's what they were, and they haven't learned. If it wasn't for the fact that they were needed in order to produce me, I wouldn't even give them houseroom. Failures, that's what they are. White man's legacy mate. They don't talk to me any more, probably through jealousy of my own success.
These days, of course, my days of depravity at that prison camp are long gone. Ive put it behind me for good and I have moved on, as you know. And in case you wondered, it was a conscious effort on my part not to mention the name of the school. THAT WOULD ADVERTISE THOSE FASCISTS! They should suffer in anonymity. I even boycott the bloody Boat Race, that should show them up.
By my late-teens I attended a normal college with normal rebels. A more healthy environment of long hair, squatting and free love. For the first time I knew what Cold Turkey was and what an STD clinic looked like from the inside. That's your University of Life there.
Indeed, due to my insight I set up the JOHNATHAN LEFTWINGER REACTIONARY MOVEMENT, an on-campus reform squad. However, I thought that the word Reactionary was the same as Revolutionary, so once I changed the name I started to have members. (It may seem as if I'm making myself look weak and inferior by exposing my mistakes, but as this was the very first mistake I had ever made then I see no harm in mentioning it. Shows my famous humilty mate!).
Indeed, once the other members of the movement told me exactly how to go about doing it, I BECAME A PIONEER IN THE STUDENT REBEL MOVEMENT MATE! We shouted, held strikes over wars and things (poxy Yanks!), set fire to dustbins and had ever so much fun.
My 1981 student shout/sit-ins were legendary. Even though I left the college in 1969, my enthusiasm was far from dampened. I threw paint at fascist lecturers, stones at the other ones and jumped up and down and ranted at the top of my voice, speaking up for student concerns. Even when the police came (more fascists) I Would Not Be Moved. I nearly got sectioned, but it was all worth it for Student Rights!
Well, that was the beginning of the Leftwinger Revolution. I'm ever so dedicated, even today. I keep in touch with other students (wanting to destroy The System from within by becoming bank managers or Tories) and I've got every John Lennon album! Just proves it!
These days my my movement has evolved (not that it wasn't perfect from Day One) into the JOHNATHAN LEFTWINGER FOUNDATION FOR THE IMPROVEMENT OF PERSONS ('MAN' is too sexist). We meet every Wednesday at Leftwinger Towers, which is for now the back of the NCP car park as I'm having a tassle with local government over having my own building. You'd think they'd support Labour!
So all you proper people out there can still talk (and act) against Fascists, the Public and Parents alike, every Wednesday, GUARANTEED! (Mind, I don't bother if it's raining, stands to reason).
LET'S GET THE REVOLUTION CONCLUDED! WE ARE RIGHT AND EVERYONE ELSE IS WRONG! VOTE LABOUR!