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Update

Good news for me...my last scan came out good so I get to stay on the Opdiva cocktail instead of heavy-duty chemo. Still no symptoms of any kind except shortness of breath. I swear I am blessed.

I've had a hard time coming to terms with what happened. I call it mental masturbating. I tend to hash and rehash what's happened and have been borderline obsessive with Tom's unbelievable behavior.

The counselor suggested a journal. That's been helpful. And I've come to manage my sleep so I'm well rested -- which helps a lot. Things seem never bleaker than at 3 am on a sleepless night.

My friends are my gift. They are wonderful. Have taken a few short trips with some of the,. Always breakfast, lunch or dinner out a few times a week. And phone calls in between.

I've gotten more projects done around the house! Staying busy is,excellent therapy. Looking around, one wonderful side effect of Tom not being her anymore is that I'm back living my minimalist lifestyle. Don't have to contend with his hoarding tendencies.

Tom's sister and his brother's girlfriend have stayed in touch. Lunch with them next week. I'm still not sure how that feels... His sister started to tell me something about what he was doing, and I stopped her. "Just let me know if he's on fire," I said. I did apologize for that. He is her brother and in her life, of course. But I just don't want to know.

What's that Kevin O'Leary quote? ""You're dead to me." It's really not far off since the man I thought I knew hasn't existed for quite some time.

Betrayal is a horrible feeling. Add it to a terminal diagnosis and it becomes almost unbearable. But having said that, though, I'm doing much better.

I was betrayed one other time in my life. It took me better than a year to get it into perspective. I finally did so by working on one thing: forgiveness. Someone posted on Facebook today a quote by Tony Robbins... forgiveness is a gift to yourself.

Hit me like a ton of bricks, as they say. I'm workin' on it. I'll get there. Not that HE will ever know - or care - but I will.

Tomorrow is lunch with friends at Wildfire in Schaumburg, a top-notch steakhouse. I'll have to find something to get into Friday and Saturday. And Sunday evening is dinner and a movie with a friend. Next week is busy.

Thanks for listening!
 

DiAnna

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Few people could survive cancer and soul-shattering betrayal at the same time and come through it with strength and dignity. Good for you Mags! It's nice to hear that you are enjoying time with your friends, and are getting on with the things in life that bring you happiness.

*hugs*
 

nota bene

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Forgiveness is a gift to yourself, and you deserve it too, Maggie.

Very happy to learn that you'll still be on the cocktail. Yay!
 

MaggieD

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DiAnna, thank you so much. Your words mean such a great deal to me. Your first sentence is like a symphony. Hugs right back.

Nota! Sometimes I think you live down the block from me! Thank you for your good wishes!

❤️
 

MaggieD

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Didn't notice I could grab quotes to alert you both to my reply.
 

Lutherf

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I've got to tell you, I really admire the way you're handling all of this. A little grace, a lot of fortitude and an occasional baseball bat. That's inspirational!
 

Rexedgar

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Best wishes, It is said that attitude is a large factor in both of the challenges that you have/are undergoing. If true (attitude), I think you are going to do just fine!
 

CanadaJohn

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Hi Maggie - not a religious person, but I always remember the old quote/saying "God only gives you what you can handle". Your experiences the past couple of years, with your mom, your health, and Tom, say to me that if there is a God, he/she sure has a lot of faith in your strength and abilities. Keep giving em hell Maggie - take care.
 

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"...and an occasional baseball bat." I love it! Thank you, Luther.

And, Rex, thank you for your kind words. They mean a great deal to me.

Canada, I will definitely try to keep given' 'em hell!

Thank you all. I eagerly come back to my blog to almost get strengthened. You guys are awesome.
 

longview

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People say adversity builds character, but that is not entire accurate.
Adversity revels character, and Maggie, you have plenty.
I am glad to hear you are feeling well and enjoying yourself.
Take care!
 

<alt>doxygen

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Maggie, I'm so happy to hear your good news!

All I can do is echo what the other comments have said. You have proven that you are tough as nails and that you can make very good decisions even in the worst of circumstances. Here's hoping you have already persevered through the worst of it.

You are an example Maggie. I'm not exactly religious, but bless you for that.

:peace
 

brothern

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I've had a hard time coming to terms with what happened. I call it mental masturbating. I tend to hash and rehash what's happened and have been borderline obsessive with Tom's unbelievable behavior.

I've had a long term boyfriend cheat on me before. That was bad enough. Hashing and rehashing is totally normal. Prepare to do it for months, if not years. :?
 

Quag

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Glad to hear you got soem good news.
 

Middleground

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Keep fighting the good fight, Mags. I admire your strength!
 

Rogue Valley

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Great news Maggie! Godspeed on your recovery.
 

Trippy Trekker

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Thank you for opening up very intimate parts of your life with us! We have become an integral part of your Family. Your fortitude and candor through heartbreak and a Life or Death battle continue to inspire me. May Grace, Honor, Humor and Love guide you. Feel some Love! In DP World you Rock!
 

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Thank you all for your good wishes. And Trippy? You rock as well.
 
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