Tip Jar Redux

Continued from:
https://www.debatepolitics.com/blogs/angel/1516-tip-jar.html

Pharisees on Hollywood and Vine


So the other day I run into this Old Yank Boomer I know, nice guy, always liked him,

and he gets his panties in a twist about a movie I said I liked—

I mean, he's having a calf over this, making a scene right there on the street in broad daylight!

You see, he objected to something in the movie,

some of the content of the movie was objectionable to him,

and he objected because something depicted in the movie was offensive to him.

The fellow was morally outraged.

Pretty strong stuff for Hollywood and Vine.

But now get this— the guy hadn't even seen the movie!

That's right!

He'd read about the movie, you see.

In fact he refused to see the movie, he said, because of what he'd read about it.

Are you getting all this?

I'd seen the movie. And liked it.

He'd read about the movie. And refused to see it.

And here he was, lording it over me in public,

going on about how he's more "evolved" than I am and more enlightened and suchlike

because although what was depicted in this movie had been depicted in movies time and again since the dawn of the motion picture era

—and he acknowledged as much—

—indeed, this is what outraged him—

such content was no longer acceptable to the "evolved" and enlightened moviegoer.

Well, that's the poem.

After that we parted company friendly enough.

He went on his way, and I on mine.

No hard feelings.

It was only a movie after all.

It wasn't politics or religion.

So why write the poem then?

Well, you see, he hadn't actually seen the movie.

He'd only read about it.

I'd seen it.

Do you see, Pharisee?

Just the other day.

Right here on Hollywood and Vine



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The Only Responsible Thing

This guy at work says he's going to get snipped

He says him and his wife talked it over and they decided this was the only responsible thing to do

He was eating a baloney sandwich

This guy always brown-bagged it and his wife always trimmed the crust off the Wonder bread for him

This other guy from shipping was there too digging into an order of spare ribs from King Wok and making a mess

And he agreed with the guy who was going to get snipped that it was the only responsible thing to do

he seen a PBS show on the population explosion

but it ain't a hundred percent effective, he says

this guy he knows got snipped and then his wife got pregnant anyways

I aksed did his friend get a DNA test and the guy who was eating the baloney snorted and nodded but kept chewing

Then this guy from sales sits down with us and starts moaning about the air conditioning in the cafeteria

He had the tuna fish salad

And the guy from shipping pipes up again cause of course he seen a show on PBS about global warning

But the guy from sales ain't buying it

So I take a bite out of my Granny Smith and listen close

"Cattle farts," he says

"Cattle farts?" says the guy from shipping

Just then the guy eating baloney rips a loud one

Perfect timing too



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The Trouble in Life

Believe it or not I tried to write a goddamn poem once

of all things a haiku

this was a long time ago

in order to impress a young lady as I recall

I can't think of any other reason I'd try to do something as foolish as that

and everything foolish in the history of the world has been done for the same reason

some noble things too I'll give you that

but the first cause of trouble in life is what it is and it's what I said it is
and that's all she wrote

and this is what I wrote:


a chill in the air
the daffodils look confused
umbrellas blossom


I came across it after all these years don't ask me how and God only knows why

and my first thought was well it ain't all that bad really

though I am no judge of haiku if truth be told

My second thought was but maybe the first line could be improved

and this of course is the second cause of trouble in life

the third cause is denying the first and second causes

and I thought maybe a chill rain in March

That would account for the umbrellas



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Nothing Personal

Don't take it personally, the old man said
smiling gently and shaking his head.

Then tearing off a piece of bread,
chewing he said:

This thing went on a long time without you.
Likely it'll be going on without you again some day and for another long time.
The indifference of the universe is sublime.
The impersonality of life is reason to rejoice.

There was real joy in his voice.

That you don't matter in the least in the grand scheme of things should be an imponderable relief to you.

Be happy to be insignificant.

That is salvation, he said,
and with that word he excused himself
and went to bed.



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Last Call

He sat out of focus
at the end of the bar
silent for centuries

squaring the circle
with boilermakers
and beer nuts

At length he raised a glass
to the shadows and gleams
with a tired flourish

"Here’s to old-school Italian fathers
And their daughters—
May they all reach port in troubled waters."

Then he tossed back the shot
chased it
and rapped his minor knuckles
twice
on top of the bar


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​

 

[Angel]

There is a difference, JB, between blank verse and free verse. A recognized difference. And a recognizable difference. So the distinction is creditable. But that is not the end of the matter, it seems to me. That is rather the beginning.

 

[Angel]

"Pharisees on Hollywood and Vine " is, I regret to say, based on an actual encounter, yes. Of course it didn't take place on Hollywood and Vine. The movie? The movie? I think it was called Nocturnal Animals. But of course that's neither here nor there at this point.

 

[Angel]

That's a good question, JB. After all, poetic imagination, religious imagination, and scientific imagination are the three pillars of civilization. Remove one of those pillars and the structure collapses. Rationality is tripodal. Popular ignorance of the architecture of human thought points to a failure of education, a tragic development of the last half-century.