Terrible two's are nothing compared to 4 year olds.

[WI Crippler]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

 

[StillBallin75]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

I thought Marines were good at giving a good ass-whoopin? What happened dude?

 

[WI Crippler]

I thought Marines were good at giving a good ass-whoopin? What happened dude?

I'm saving it for when he thinks he actually has a shot to beat me.

 

[Goshin]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

Yes, it does, if you beat that ass like a Muslim does his prayers: five times a day if necessary. :lol:

Remember: Daddy always wins. Always.

When mine was about 4 we had a four month long contest on who was the boss. By month three I began to despair; the level of consistent discipline I had to enforce was wearing ME down. But all the sudden the boy ran out of rebellion, got tired of having a sore ass, and he's been almost invariably well-behaved and obedient ever since.

Which is good, since he's almost 6'2" now. :lol:

 

[Temporal]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

No age sticks out in my mind with my kid, just ages with different sets of challenges. Sometimes I think the idea of terrible twos becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy for some parents just so that they can turn around and complain about it. My kid was high needs as a baby, he cried a LOT and needed a lot of support. It was just his character. Once he started learning some words by age two I found it much easier to communicate about what was going on.

It's all relative I guess.

 

[WI Crippler]

Yes, it does, if you beat that ass like a Muslim does his prayers: five times a day if necessary. :lol:

Remember: Daddy always wins. Always.

When mine was about 4 we had a four month long contest on who was the boss. By month three I began to despair; the level of consistent discipline I had to enforce was wearing ME down. But all the sudden the boy ran out of rebellion, got tired of having a sore ass, and he's been almost invariably well-behaved and obedient ever since.

Which is good, since he's almost 6'2" now. :lol:

Do i have to make him face Mecca?

 

[Goshin]

Do i have to make him face Mecca?

Might as well. I'd make him whistle the Star Spangled Banner while I beat his ass too, just for lulz. :lol:

 

[BDBoop]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

I once heard that "the even years" blow. Teens? Thanks be to all that's holy that she was an only child and? Never again.

And I had one of the good ones.

 

[Redress]

Based on my experience with other people's kids, I have found the age of about 4-6 to be the years when kids are at their most sadistic. They have also hit the age where they have discovered the joy of throwing fits, but are not old enough to temper those fits due to an understanding of the penalties they will receive yet.

 

[WI Crippler]

Based on my experience with other people's kids, I have found the age of about 4-6 to be the years when kids are at their most sadistic. They have also hit the age where they have discovered the joy of throwing fits, but are not old enough to temper those fits due to an understanding of the penalties they will receive yet.

They throw fits way before 4 years old. But the 4 year old is able to persist and rationalize their bad behavior and continue to repeat it, and here is the difference, on purpose.

 

[StillBallin75]

Just from my experience of BEING a kid, i was always well-behaved because my mom's like a super-tiger mom who brooked no argument, nohow. If you even thought about talking back she would whoop your ass until you couldn't even sit on it cuz your butt was so badly bruised.

 

[DiAnna]

Choose a course and be consistent. Consistency is the key to successful parenting (she says after the fact, as she looks back and realizes that if she'd only been consistent, things might have been easier for everyone!).

Learn from my mistakes. The same consequence for the same behavior, each and every time. And BDBoop is right. It was never about the "terrible twos". It was always about the "terrible teens". *shudders*

 

[Goshin]

Choose a course and be consistent. Consistency is the key to successful parenting (she says after the fact, as she looks back and realizes that if she'd only been consistent, things might have been easier for everyone!).

Learn from my mistakes. The same consequence for the same behavior, each and every time. And BDBoop is right. It was never about the "terrible twos". It was always about the "terrible teens". *shudders*

Agreed. But if you start with consistent discipline when they are little, the teens should not be so terrible.

 

[Simon W. Moon]

Be glad he has a strong will.
Work it to your advantage. Be tricky.

My kids like to try and turn things into a battle of wills. But I have more success in influencing their behavior when I don't accept the gauntlet.
We turned all of the punishments for the elder child into opportunities to earn privileges instead.
for example
Instead of taking away the privilege to watch a movie, he instead must earn the privilege of watching a movie. That way, we still get the behaviors we want out of the rascal, but instead of having to chase, chide and threaten, he comes to us to show us how he has done a good job.

But, given the large differences between the two I have living under my roof, I suspect tat the differences amongst children can be quite large.

Do w/e works for you. But, I advise not getting caught up in getting your way so much that you lose sight of why you wanted a certain thing done or not done.
And if you screw up, fess up and change your decree. Don't get so enamored of consistency, (which is important), that you stick with one of your bad ideas rather than doing what's right.

remember the person on the other side of those little eyes and be right to them

imho
ymmv

 

[Cold Highway]

You need to whack him, thats what my dad did to me when I did stupid stuff and then some.

 

[BDBoop]

Agreed. But if you start with consistent discipline when they are little, the teens should not be so terrible.

Would be true if child remained said child. Child morphs to another being entirely.

 

[mike2810]

Would be true if child remained said child. Child morphs to another being entirely.

Yep, I thought my step daughter lost all her brain cells when she turned into a teenager. Gladly, the seemed to have grown back when she got into her mid to late 20's.

 

[BDBoop]

Yep, I thought my step daughter lost all her brain cells when she turned into a teenager. Gladly, the seemed to have grown back when she got into her mid to late 20's.

My baby girl locked eyes with me and LIED. I gave her what for, and went into my room and quietly sobbed into my pillow. That was a painful one.

 

[mike2810]

My baby girl locked eyes with me and LIED. I gave her what for, and went into my room and quietly sobbed into my pillow. That was a painful one.

I've been there. Just know you love them, they know that, and hold to your beliefs. Bet your kids have turned out ok.

 

[BDBoop]

I've been there. Just know you love them, they know that, and hold to your beliefs. Bet your kids have turned out ok.

She's amazing. And we're like the Gilmore Girls. Can't imagine life without her. I wish the same for you.

 

[Goshin]

Would be true if child remained said child. Child morphs to another being entirely.

That's true, to some degree... they start growing up, and adjustments have to be made. We had a rough patch around 13, and I had to adjust my parenting methods a bit to allow for the fact that my child was no longer quite a child, anymore. Since then things have been good, though I'll grant there are changes to be dealt with every year.

Of course, he's just starting high school, and no doubt there are many "adventures in parenting" still laying in ambush for me. :afraid:

 

[Singularity]

Of course, he's just starting high school, and no doubt there are many "adventures in parenting" still laying in ambush for me. :afraid:

I don't have kids in high school, but from what I understand, when you add your child to your car insurance, the insurance company provides you with a few new options.

1. Pay monthly by second mortgage
2. Pay the entire bill with your lottery winnings

 

[Alyssa]

Yes, it does, if you beat that ass like a Muslim does his prayers: five times a day if necessary. :lol:

Remember: Daddy always wins. Always.

When mine was about 4 we had a four month long contest on who was the boss. By month three I began to despair; the level of consistent discipline I had to enforce was wearing ME down. But all the sudden the boy ran out of rebellion, got tired of having a sore ass, and he's been almost invariably well-behaved and obedient ever since.

Which is good, since he's almost 6'2" now. :lol:

My daughter is turning four this month, and still throws fits, but since I never give in to them, they don't usually last too long. Either I make her stand in the corner or I laugh at her. Since neither reaction gets her what she wants, she doesn't often repeat it.

 

[Goshin]

My daughter is turning four this month, and still throws fits, but since I never give in to them, they don't usually last too long. Either I make her stand in the corner or I laugh at her. Since neither reaction gets her what she wants, she doesn't often repeat it.

That's cool; whatever works for you. Every child is different.

 

[Aunt Spiker]

So whomever coined the term "the terrible two's" for children obviously said this before their kid reached the age of 4. I don't know what switch got thrown but this phase of my son's development has been the most difficult for me to handle. someone out there with older kids tell me there is some respite between this age and teen years? I'm not talking about a little bit of issues every now and then. I'm talking about the constant willful stubborness that comes with every time I tell him "no". Does that go away?

There is no reprieve. There will always be *something* to struggle through - sometimes it's not so hard, sometimes it is.

My oldest son is a great kid - no problems - was on the junior honor roll society . . . . until he lost his temper with someone who was picking on him and threatened to kill him.

:shrug: You never know what's going to be around the corner. Stay ever vigilent and flexible.