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Teen Gets USB Cord Stuck In Urethra

Roadvirus

Roadvirus

Heading North
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No folks, you did not read that wrong. Some moldy jello brained teen in the UK stuck a USB cord up his dinger...

A U.K. teen had to undergo emergency surgery after a bananas attempt to measure his manhood resulted in him getting a USB cable lodged in his urethra.

The phallic fiasco reportedly began after an unnamed 15-year-old boy was "triggered by sexual curiosity" and inserted a USB wire into his urethra, per a wince-worthy study published in the medical journal Urology Case Reports.

www.foxnews.com

Teen gets USB cable stuck in penis in backfired attempt to measure length

A U.K. teen had to undergo emergency surgery after a bananas attempt to measure his manhood resulted in him getting a USB cable lodged in his urethra.
www.foxnews.com www.foxnews.com
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"which required surgeons to make an incision in the region between his genitals and anus to yank it out."

Weird-ass kinks, stupid prizes. I guess. Don't do that again. (But...both ends sticking out? What?)

Also get vaccinated. Otherwise you're like him. Except you might die.
 
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Poor kid is never going to hear the end of this.

"Did you try flipping it over so it would fit?"

"Were you trying to charge your boner?'

"That is an output port only!"

Etc.
 
Roadvirus said:
No folks, you did not read that wrong. Some moldy jello brained teen in the UK stuck a USB cord up his dinger...
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This sounds like something that happens either the first time it is tried and one is totally unprepared, or the thousandth time when one thinks they are so experienced but has become too cocky.
 
Felis Leo said:
This sounds like something that happens either the first time it is tried and one is totally unprepared, or the thousandth time when one thinks they are so experienced but has become too cocky.
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My first reaction was to look at a usb cord, both micro and usb-c (really hope he didn't use the usb-a end) and think there is no way that's the first time he's put something there.
 
Filed under 'News of the weird'.
 
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
 
Thankfully, the boy recovered without incident and was discharged from the hospital the following day. However, he did have to undergo a follow-up scan two weeks later and will require monitoring in the future.
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Doctors will monitor the boy, and the parents will keep an eye on any and all USB cords in the house.
 
Roadvirus said:
No folks, you did not read that wrong. Some moldy jello brained teen in the UK stuck a USB cord up his dinger...
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Who hasn't had that happen?! I just found my phone charger stuck to my taint!
 
Like...the charging end? His dick must be legendary. I mean, the cord part, sure...I suppose I could get that to fit most any old urethra. But the rest?

Hung like a horse. That's all I'm gonna say.
 
Roadvirus said:
No folks, you did not read that wrong. Some moldy jello brained teen in the UK stuck a USB cord up his dinger...
Click to expand...

I am trying to figure out how he was able to insert an electronic plug of ANY kind in his urethra!
Like others have said, if you can jam any kind of plug up that hole, you'd have to be hung like a bull moose.
Either that or so impervious to pain that it doesn't matter?

My brain hurts.
 
Mr Person said:
"which required surgeons to make an incision in the region between his genitals and anus to yank it out."

Weird-ass kinks, stupid prizes. I guess. Don't do that again. (But...both ends sticking out? What?)

Also get vaccinated. Otherwise you're like him. Except you might die.
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Except if you have an abortion someone is going to die. So let women elect to make their health care decision with involves a definite death, but force everyone to get the vaccine because "you might die".
 
MaryP said:
We've definitely got to share tape measure technology with the UK.
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Should be easier now that they're planning to quit using the metric system.
 
Demon said:
Should be easier now that they're planning to quit using the metric system.
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Are they really? That's pretty dumb.
 
Demon said:
Should be easier now that they're planning to quit using the metric system.
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Good for them. It is a far more intuitive form of measurement worthy of a free people. Metric was the system of measurement used by tyrants convinced of the rational basis of their tyranny, such as Napoleon, Hitler and Stalin. And all of these tyrannies were eventually defeated by those using the Imperial system.

I am being only half ironic with that statement. 😉
 
Felis Leo said:
Good for them. It is a far more intuitive form of measurement worthy of a free people. Metric was the system of measurement used by tyrants convinced of the rational basis of their tyranny, such as Napoleon, Hitler and Stalin. And all of these tyrannies were eventually defeated by those using the Imperial system.

I am being only half ironic with that statement. 😉
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I'm happy to see it because being an American, I never fully learned or embraced the metric system. Mostly because I never had to. Now we need to convert the rest of the world. Canada?
 
Demon said:
I'm happy to see it because being an American, I never fully learned or embraced the metric system. Mostly because I never had to. Now we need to convert the rest of the world. Canada?
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I've been here 10 years and it's still 50/50. Best to know both.
 
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