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Thanks, my new friend!
Been smoking myself since I was a teeny bopper - I'm probably what you call a "serial quitter." In other words, I make many resolutions, but never ultimately stick to my decision to remain smoke free. I only have been smoking cigs a total of about ten years - did smoke a tobacco pipe while in college a few years ago (as a way to impress my friends).... Had been smoking the pipe only two years or so, when my dentist biopsied a spot on my cheek - wasn't cancer, but scared the **** out of me, so I promptly gave up that horrible habit and went back to cigs.... So, if you take the ten years total that I've been smoking and minus about 5.5 years, that's how long I've been smoking continuously (day after day) this time. I'm young enough that the experts say I can get most/if not all of my health/lung capacity back if I quit now. I don't cough much - don't know if that's good or bad, although I'm not exercising as much as I was this past summer (I was walking/jogging up to ten miles a day, every day)..... That is what really bothers me - I also like to ride mountain bikes and can't even do that when I smoke.... There was a time a couple years ago when I was bench pressing nearly 400 pounds, now I can barely bench my weight (won't say what it is, but I'm within a normal weight range for my age/height, etc.). Diet has been not good either.... I've made a list of reasons I want to quit:
1) Health concerns - this one speaks for itself....
2) It's killing my parents and others I care about seeing me smoking - I want to make them all proud of me by showing them I can do this and stay smoke free.
3) Social concerns - smokers are in the vast minority these days.... Furthermore, what girl in her right mind wants anything to do with a smoker? So, smoking stops me there as well - give me the choice of a hot date or a cigarette, I'll be more likely to choose the cigarette....
4) Right thinking - this one goes hand in hand with #3 above. If I'm putting smoking as a priority ahead of everything else in my life, I'm not thinking right.... Frankly, I'm probably a mess/basket case
5) I don't want to die young.
6) There are plenty of things I want - like a new Epiphone Les Paul electric guitar (1 - 3 grand) or a Keilwurth Black Nickel Tenor Saxophone (5 -10 grand), that I'll never be able to buy if I keep smoking. Smoking is expensive and I'm pretty much spending all my parents' allowance on cigarettes these days.....
7) I go to a wonderful church - I'm pretty much the only one whom goes there whom smokes. So, I pretty much feel like a social outcast, even when I'm around good people whom care about me and vice versa. Furthermore, I don't believe God wants me to smoke and get cancer or something. Been praying about this a lot lately and maybe that's why I'm here, posting in this group.
8) My niece is in first grade - she looks up to me a lot and I don't want to influence her to makes bad decisions as she gets older. It would kill me to see her smoke. Whenever I think of quitting smoking, I think of my niece - if nothing else, I want to do this for her....
9) I want to work with kids - I teach both golf lessons and music lessons. However, I won't even go there if I'm still smoking. Kids copy the behavior of adults they admire - no way do I want to influence the behavior of young minds in a negative way. This one probably explains why I'm still unemployed and not teaching right now.....
10) I like to exercise - until recently, was walking up to 10 miles a day and riding my mountain bike as well. Haven't felt like it lately - goes to show my lungs are probably shot to hell..... The good news is (from what I've heard), I'm still young enough that I can get most (if not all) of my lung capacity back - if, that is, I quit now....
I have a pack of cigs with me right now - am looking at them and haven't made up my mind yet.......
OK, I've made up my mind - I just crushed the pack and threw away my remaining smokes
Just for today, I don't want to smoke....
Thanks.
(see more here, where I originally posted the list: Nicotine - group at Addicts-Anon scroll to page 2)
So I tried to quit for Dad's birthday today shortly after I made that list - didn't make it and have smoked nearly a pack today.... However, Christmas is coming and that's my favorite day of the year. Am going to make a serious attempt to stop by Christmas Day this year - will keep you posted.
Thanks again, code1211 - congrats on staying stopped, as well! Your story gives me hope and the confidence that I can do it too - I just have to keep putting one step in front of the other (even though some of the time, anyway, it seems like I'm taking 3 steps forward and 2 steps back - or is it 2 steps forward and 3 steps back?) Lol, don't really know right now how/if I'm going to succeed this time - will say that I really want badly to give myself the best Christmas present ever.
Thanks for reading this, code1211 - Hope you and your family have an awesome Christmas and a super New Year!
Same to you, Nightrider.
All things happen in their own time. Be patient and know that all you want and need is coming your way.
You sound very, very active and driven. Don't worry about this little part of your life. It will get squared away and one day soon, it will be a part of your past and you will wonder why it ever controlled you. One of my favorite movies is "Groundhog day" with Bill Murray. He recites a snippet of a poem that went something like "Winter sleeps with a smile on his face dreaming of Spring".
The whole movie is working on so many levels that it gets past you if you aren't careful. At one point the pretty leading lady asks, "So this is how you spend eternity?" The point being that we are all changing and growing all the time. We can all start again at any moment and fulfill whatever promises to ourselves that we make. Live and love your life.
Kahlil Gibran asked about the future: "And tomorrow… What is tomorrow to the over prudent dog burying bones in the trackless sands as he follows the Pilgrims to the Holy City?"
Don't allow an imagined tomorrow to ruin a real today. You don't have enough of either.