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people that have booty calls or maintain guys

Vallista

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?
 

sangha

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

One part of me is OK with anything consensual. You're both (presumably) adults and can make decisions for yourself.

The other part of me thinks that we should all think about the type of person we want to be, and then look at what we do and as "Would the person I want to be do this?"
 

Fisher

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happens a lot in college
 

SapphireSpire

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Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?
It's not wrong but it's hazardous. If the women you're sleeping with are sleeping with other guys who are also sleeping with other women it makes you vulnerable to STI. You could already be infected and not know it because some people have no symptoms. And what happens if one of your girls gets pregnant? Having a kid might be one of your goals in life but it can wreck your life all the same. You want to do it at the right time and with the right woman.
 

Bob Blaylock

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers [sic]. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

I suppose that if you have so little respect for a woman as to engage in sexual intimacy with her without having any genuine emotional/romantic relationship; then I should not be at all surprised that you have so little respect for her as to discuss the intimate activities between her and yourself with third parties whose business it is not.

And the woman you are having this sex with is “one of my maintenance crew memebers [sic]”? Clearly a coworker, and from the way you phrased that, possibly a subordinate. Gee, I can't imagine how anything would go wrong there, can you?
 

Mycroft

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I suppose your age range has something to do with it...especially if you are in the prime child-bearing range.

I was married for 17 years...I've been divorced for 13 years. I have 2 grown children. I have no desire to form attachments that could lead to marriage or children. Luckily, I have two lady friends...near my own age...who are in similar frames of mind. The result is that we enjoy spending time together for dinners, events and, yes, sex. The two ladies know about each other and one of them sees another man. I don't mind because I know that either of my friends will take the same care in selecting others as they took in selecting me.

btw, I once took both ladies to a special symphonic concert. We all had a great time together...even though we didn't engage in sex that night. Who knows...maybe some other time.
 

Vallista

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So it does exist. I understand being up front with the people you engage in any type relationship. Why is such a stigma to engage in sexual lust with people you might care for?
 

Mycroft

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So it does exist. I understand being up front with the people you engage in any type relationship. Why is such a stigma to engage in sexual lust with people you might care for?

Are you asking me?
 

Aunt Spiker

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

You really called her a member of your 'maintenance crew' - lol - You wouldn't be getting anymore from me after denoting me to the lowest common denominator like that.

Now, generally speaking, I have no problem with casual sex and open relationships as long as you're honest with the person that you're not exclusive and you do have sex with others - STI's, pregnancy, and emotional problems can come up if you're not squared away BEFORE YOU ****.

Sounds like you waited 'til AFTER YOU ****ED. What the hell, man? You should at least discuss the nature of your 'relationship' (like - we're casual **** buddies or we're something more - or 'I **** around a lot') before you get there.

You know - a shred of decency.

If that reduces your chances of getting laid - oh well - so be it. You want to find people who identify with your lifestyle, don't you?
 

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

As long as you're up front about the bolded, I don't really see any problem with it. It's probably not something I would do though since I've seen it make a couple of my friends lives complicated.
 

Surtr

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This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you?
I used to, but we eventually parted ways. I'm not what some would call a "social person", and I'm simply not emotionally available after certain experiences. We still talk here and there, but sex is mutually off the table now. We both knew what it was. She's married now, and I'm happy for her, but that was definitely the end of that particular type of relationship we had.

Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?
Depends. For married people, I definitely see it as being wrong on the highest level. Single people who are sexually responsible are free to do as they please, especially when they have socially crippling issues.
 
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DDD

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As long as you're up front about the bolded, I don't really see any problem with it. It's probably not something I would do though since I've seen it make a couple of my friends lives complicated.

Yes, very complicated! :doh

So glad I am done with that!

But...
 

SmokeAndMirrors

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I find it interesting how many assumptions people are making without knowing the facts (whether you did or didn't tell you partner in advance it was an open thing, whether you had an agreement to disclose, etc).

I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're doing. It's uncommon mainly because we live in a fairly Puritanical society, but that doesn't make our society "correct," per se.

I would say do what works for you and you partners. Nothing more, nothing less. Be honest, and be yourself. Non-typical relationships can be difficult in our society, and it's worthwhile to assess whether a given individual has the constitution to deal with that, but it doesn't make you wrong.
 

Hard Truth

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I suppose that if you have so little respect for a woman as to engage in sexual intimacy with her without having any genuine emotional/romantic relationship; then I should not be at all surprised that you have so little respect for her as to discuss the intimate activities between her and yourself with third parties whose business it is not.

And the woman you are having this sex with is “one of my maintenance crew memebers [sic]”? Clearly a coworker, and from the way you phrased that, possibly a subordinate. Gee, I can't imagine how anything would go wrong there, can you?

It is not necessarily disrespectful to have sex with someone without having an emotional attachment as long as you are honest and kind.

Warning: Don't do it too often or too close in time, it's human nature to get emotionally attached when you are intimate for more than a short time.

...and be safe and always use a condom.
 
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lizzie

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This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

No, not here. Sex is part of a package deal for me. If I care about someone enough to have sex with them, then it's gone way beyond sex for me. I want the whole enchilada. :lol:
 

roguenuke

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking, are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

Okay, since someone else brought it up and made me think that maybe I missed the euphemism, I have to ask. Is "maintenance crew member" a euphemism, or do you work with this woman? Because I honestly read it as you worked with her and just hit up your coworker for sex. Now, I'm not sure.

Now, as for the question, I've never personally had a "booty call". (I've known some women who had them and who were them, usually denying it. I've known men who have had them, but not sure that I've known any men who were either knowingly or unknowingly an intentional booty call.) I do think it is very important that all parties are aware of the situation before it happens. It simply isn't right to even allow a guy or girl to believe that there might be a chance of a future/relationship in that situation. Basically, they should be looking for a person just to have sex with as well, without any desire for a relationship. And I think extra precautions in such a situation would be very good, considering the nature of the relationship.
 

Bob Blaylock

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Okay, since someone else brought it up and made me think that maybe I missed the euphemism, I have to ask. Is "maintenance crew member" a euphemism, or do you work with this woman? Because I honestly read it as you worked with her and just hit up your coworker for sex. Now, I'm not sure.

That's how I read it as well. And the way the OP said, “she was one of my maintenance crew memebers[sic], I took to indicate that the OP was in a supervisory position over this crew, one member of which was the woman with whom he was having sex. A supervisor in a professional setting, having a sexual affair with an subordinate, is a very bad situation that could have a severe adverse impact on the careers of both involved.

And that's before we consider some of the dishonest aspects of the affair that have at least been hinted at, that have the potential to make the affair go very badly even without the professional entanglement.

I've never before heard the term “maintenance crew” used as a euphemism in the way that it now appears that the OP might have intended it. I guess we can hope this was a euphemism, and not a literal reference to a professional connection. It's still a very bad situation, but not as bad if the professional connection isn't there.
 
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iggicee

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As long as everyone is on the same page with regards to where the relationship is going (or not going in this case) I see nothing wrong with it.
 

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Banging the hired help?

Sounds like the activity of plantation owners in the 1840s. They did quite a bit of that, too.
 

Vallista

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Okay, since someone else brought it up and made me think that maybe I missed the euphemism, I have to ask. Is "maintenance crew member" a euphemism, or do you work with this woman? Because I honestly read it as you worked with her and just hit up your coworker for sex. Now, I'm not sure.

Now, as for the question, I've never personally had a "booty call". (I've known some women who had them and who were them, usually denying it. I've known men who have had them, but not sure that I've known any men who were either knowingly or unknowingly an intentional booty call.) I do think it is very important that all parties are aware of the situation before it happens. It simply isn't right to even allow a guy or girl to believe that there might be a chance of a future/relationship in that situation. Basically, they should be looking for a person just to have sex with as well, without any desire for a relationship. And I think extra precautions in such a situation would be very good, considering the nature of the relationship.

lol I should clear that up, Maintance crew just means a group of women I sleep with just to make sure everything still works. Just another team for booty calls. lol sorry for the confusion. Yes, all the women I've been with understand from the very begining whats going on. I don't or won't lead women on, because that is just wrong.
 

roguenuke

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lol I should clear that up, Maintance crew just means a group of women I sleep with just to make sure everything still works. Just another team for booty calls. lol sorry for the confusion. Yes, all the women I've been with understand from the very begining whats going on. I don't or won't lead women on, because that is just wrong.

Just checking.
 

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I was talking to a co worker about a recent hook up I had. I told about the woman, how she was one of my maintenance crew memebers. Anyways, she was really shocked that I even had a women that I just have sex with. This got me thinking,

1.)are there people out that have individuals that they only have a pure sexual relationship? Meaning in the back of your mind that person your has no future with you? This goes for men and women. I know you guys are out there.
2.) Is it wrong to have this type of relationships?

1.) yes millions
2.) if it is consensual, between adults and honest, its none of my damn business nor is its anybody's place to judge right/wrong
 
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