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"Old school" re-gifting, of a sort...

Xelor

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For as long as Christmas gifts have been given, people have received things they didn't particularly like. Back in my day, we dealt with that by simply returning the item to the store from which it came and picking something else...And, frankly, that's still what I and the rest of my family do with gifts of any sort, not just Christmas, that we don't like, haven't use for, or whatever. We just tell the person that we don't want what they gave us.....

Dear Aunt Abby,
I hope this letter finds you and Uncle Chip well.

Thank you for the escargot forks. They're beautiful and are just our style. Babs and I are touched by the thought and care you show us. Neither of us would have imagined you'd remember Babs and I enjoy cooking and entertaining and that she utterly revels in having the perfect utensil for every dish.

Inspired by your gift, we took the kids to Algernon's last evening, and you know Babs ordered the snails. To our amazement, however, Hunter and Sissy wouldn't forbear even the slightest taste. I rather expected that of Hunter; he's got a selective palate, shall we say. Sissy, however, took us aback for as much she loves garlic, we thought she'd cotton well to escargot.

The real shocker, though, wasn't the kids' reaction, but rather our learning unceremoniously my seafood allergy has morphed to include land mollusks. Thank God, Babs had my epipen in her bag, and after a while I was fine, but it gave us quite a scare at the outset of my attack.

I went to see Clark the next day and it turns out I'm so allergic I daren't even touch them, lest I break out. But enough of my travail. I'll just look at the bright side -- I'll no longer have to worry about whether the chef knows how to properly cook snails. One less burden I need bear, hugh. LOL

As you may imagine, after discovering I can't eat snails, and the kids won't, it seems we haven't much use now for escargot forks. Babs and I feel dreadful having to tell you, especially after the trouble you went through to get them. Alas, we're going to have to return them. We're so sorry, but we hope you understand.

We'll be back from Cheval by the time you and Uncle Chip return form Laucala. Babs suggested we meet at the club for drinks and then you and she go shopping. She's had her eye on something at Tiffany's and she thought she'd exchange the forks for something else while she's there. She'd love your help choosing, for she's long admired your taste. If you're up for it, we'd love to have you and Uncle Chip to dinner and the theater afterwards. Maybe we can even play a few rubbers after the show?

Anyway, ta for now, Aunt Abby. Can't wait to hear about your trip. Much love to Uncle Chip.

Yours always,
Xelor and Babs


P.S.
Hunter and Sissy send their love.

Does it take a tiny bit of effort to just tell a gift giver that you just aren't into what they gave you? Sure, but it beats having them some time later ask about the item and having then to tell them you really didn't like it, thus making clear that you also hadn't the "balls" to just tell them. And believe it or not, if the person truly cares about you -- they bought you a gift, so they must care to some degree -- they'll use the information so as to make a better choice next time.
 
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ecofarm

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Dear Gift Rejecter,

We're saddened to learn you and your clan will remain country bumpkins, uncultured and fearful of the unaccustomed. We can only hope that you'll find hamburgers and coleslaw satisfying throughout your mundane existence.

Yours truly,
The other Side of the Tracks
 

Xelor

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Dear Gift Rejecter,

We're saddened to learn you and your clan will remain country bumpkins, uncultured and fearful of the unaccustomed. We can only hope that you'll find hamburgers and coleslaw satisfying throughout your mundane existence.

Yours truly,
The other Side of the Tracks

??? What?
 

ecofarm

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??? What?

People are trying to help you. To bring a little culture to your life. To help you experience some of the finer things in life. But no. "Only hamburgers and fries for this family!"

Low class x 2.
 

Xelor

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People are trying to help you. To bring a little culture to your life. To help you experience some of the finer things in life. But no. "Only hamburgers and fries for this family!"

Low class x 2.

Oh. Okay.

I'm sure "Aunt Abby" wouldn't have such thoughts, or at least mine wouldn't.

That wasn't the theme I was "going for" when I offered the sample "it's the thought that counts" letter, but I suppose some folks may feel that way about individuals who reject heartfelt magnanimity.
 

ecofarm

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Oh. Okay.

I'm sure "Aunt Abby" wouldn't have such thoughts, or at least mine wouldn't.

That wasn't the theme I was "going for" when I offered the sample "it's the thought that counts" letter, but I suppose some folks may feel that way about individuals who reject heartfelt magnanimity.

I think your letter is low class for several reasons.

1. Returning the gift. Just suck it up. Let them think they did something nice. Is that too much for you?

2. Thank god we had my epipen because I'm a delicate flower and you almost killed me! Snowflake.

3. My kids don't like escargot. Tastes are acquired. You appear to think it's appropriate that children choose their own.

4. Your children are dictating your family's diet/activities. Who runs your house?

For these, and other more subtle reasons, I find your self absorbed, inconsiderate, low class rejection letter nothing more than you trying to play the Big Man and showing just how small you can be.




.02
 

Xelor

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I think your letter is low class for several reasons.

1. Returning the gift. Just suck it up. Let them think they did something nice. Is that too much for you?

2. Thank god we had my epipen because I'm a delicate flower and you almost killed me! Snowflake.

3. My kids don't like escargot. Tastes are acquired. You appear to think it's appropriate that children choose their own.

4. Your children are dictating your family's diet/activities. Who runs your house?

For these, and other more subtle reasons, I find your self absorbed, inconsiderate, low class rejection letter nothing more than you trying to play the Big Man and showing just how small you can be.




.02

Well, okay...you think what suits you....
 

KevinKohler

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Here's my sample...



I don't need a special fork for eating snails, but I appreciate the thought. I exchanged your gift for a really nice set of wine glasses...which will undoubtedly see much more use. Thanks, and merry happy Christmas b day.
 

PirateMk1

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For as long as Christmas gifts have been given, people have received things they didn't particularly like. Back in my day, we dealt with that by simply returning the item to the store from which it came and picking something else...And, frankly, that's still what I and the rest of my family do with gifts of any sort, not just Christmas, that we don't like, haven't use for, or whatever. We just tell the person that we don't want what they gave us.....

Dear Aunt Abby,
I hope this letter finds you and Uncle Chip well.

Thank you for the escargot forks. They're beautiful and are just our style. Babs and I are touched by the thought and care you show us. Neither of us would have imagined you'd remember Babs and I enjoy cooking and entertaining and that she utterly revels in having the perfect utensil for every dish.

Inspired by your gift, we took the kids to Algernon's last evening, and you know Babs ordered the snails. To our amazement, however, Hunter and Sissy wouldn't forbear even the slightest taste. I rather expected that of Hunter; he's got a selective palate, shall we say. Sissy, however, took us aback for as much she loves garlic, we thought she'd cotton well to escargot.

The real shocker, though, wasn't the kids' reaction, but rather our learning unceremoniously my seafood allergy has morphed to include land mollusks. Thank God, Babs had my epipen in her bag, and after a while I was fine, but it gave us quite a scare at the outset of my attack.

I went to see Clark the next day and it turns out I'm so allergic I daren't even touch them, lest I break out. But enough of my travail. I'll just look at the bright side -- I'll no longer have to worry about whether the chef knows how to properly cook snails. One less burden I need bear, hugh. LOL

As you may imagine, after discovering I can't eat snails, and the kids won't, it seems we haven't much use now for escargot forks. Babs and I feel dreadful having to tell you, especially after the trouble you went through to get them. Alas, we're going to have to return them. We're so sorry, but we hope you understand.

We'll be back from Cheval by the time you and Uncle Chip return form Laucala. Babs suggested we meet at the club for drinks and then you and she go shopping. She's had her eye on something at Tiffany's and she thought she'd exchange the forks for something else while she's there. She'd love your help choosing, for she's long admired your taste. If you're up for it, we'd love to have you and Uncle Chip to dinner and the theater afterwards. Maybe we can even play a few rubbers after the show?

Anyway, ta for now, Aunt Abby. Can't wait to hear about your trip. Much love to Uncle Chip.

Yours always,
Xelor and Babs


P.S.
Hunter and Sissy send their love.

Does it take a tiny bit of effort to just tell a gift giver that you just aren't into what they gave you? Sure, but it beats having them some time later ask about the item and having then to tell them you really didn't like it, thus making clear that you also hadn't the "balls" to just tell them. And believe it or not, if the person truly cares about you -- they bought you a gift, so they must care to some degree -- they'll use the information so as to make a better choice next time.

:funny
 

HumblePi

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shopping
I found this snail fork online for .44 cents, not too bad. Of course a person can spend $3 each for quality forks. It's the kind of fork that I'd probably use for shrimp cocktail.

I can tell from the letter that it's written by someone more cultured and more considerate than probably 99.9% of Americans. Who else would suggest 'playing a few rubbers' after the show, and who even knows what that means?

I would have just thanked them for the snail forks, put them in the back of a drawer and forget about them forever. This is why I give many people a gift that's homemade, like a box of pecan fudge or an assortment of homemade Christmas cookies. People never return those.
 

americanwoman

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Babs utterly revels in the perfect utensil.

Babs ordered the snails.

BUT Babs has her eye on something at Tiffany's.

Why doesn't the jerk let Babs keep the perfect utensil she revels in since SHE can still eat snails then the guy can break into his dusty wallet and buy Babs what she wants at Tiffany's.
 

Xelor

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Here's my sample...



I don't need a special fork for eating snails, but I appreciate the thought. I exchanged your gift for a really nice set of wine glasses...which will undoubtedly see much more use. Thanks, and merry happy Christmas b day.

Insofar as you know them and I don't, I'll leave to your discretion the tone and tenor of telling the "Aunt Abbies" in your life that you don't want the gifts they gave you. Your diction for doing so isn't the point. The point is that in telling them, you've shown the integrity to simply tell them the truth rather than committing the lie of omission concomitant with allowing them to think mistakenly think you kept their gift.

shopping
I found this snail fork online for .44 cents, not too bad. Of course a person can spend $3 each for quality forks. It's the kind of fork that I'd probably use for shrimp cocktail.

I can tell from the letter that it's written by someone more cultured and more considerate than probably 99.9% of Americans. Who else would suggest 'playing a few rubbers' after the show, and who even knows what that means?

I would have just thanked them for the snail forks, put them in the back of a drawer and forget about them forever. This is why I give many people a gift that's homemade, like a box of pecan fudge or an assortment of homemade Christmas cookies. People never return those.

If you kept the gift, be it escargot forks or whatever, fine. You're still not misrepresenting anything, and should you be asked about them, you have a simple explanation...."Oh, we haven't found an occasion to use them, but when the time comes, we sure will use them."
 
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Josie

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Around here today is the day you see hundreds of "brand new!" things posted for sale on Facebook. And gift cards too.
 

Xelor

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shopping
I found this snail fork online for .44 cents, not too bad. Of course a person can spend $3 each for quality forks. It's the kind of fork that I'd probably use for shrimp cocktail.

I can tell from the letter that it's written by someone more cultured and more considerate than probably 99.9% of Americans. Who else would suggest 'playing a few rubbers' after the show, and who even knows what that means?

I would have just thanked them for the snail forks, put them in the back of a drawer and forget about them forever. This is why I give many people a gift that's homemade, like a box of pecan fudge or an assortment of homemade Christmas cookies. People never return those.
Off-Topic:
Blue:
It'd be fine for that, especially in 2019. Truth be told, few and far between are the households that have every specific fork, knife and spoon designed for every kind of food item needing something other than a dinner fork and knife. Then again, a lot of the "purpose" designed utensils were invented in a time when foods weren't as processed as they are now. For instance, fish was often served whole/bone-in, so diners had to negotiate bones on their own.

Many modern flatware services offer what once would have been a "snail-only" fork, calling it a "cocktail fork" and offering it for use with shrimp and mollusks. (There're different utensils for crabs/lobsters.) AFAIK, one'd have to buy antique flatware to find matched sets having distinct shrimp and snail forks. Outside of formal diplomatic functions hosted by non-Americans, I doubt one'd encounter an occasion in the US whereat one'd encounter a shrimp and an escargot fork. (Whichever one encounters at a formal dinner, it'll be the only fork on the right side of one's place setting.)

FWIW, shrimp forks usually have two or three short tines and the utensil overall usually is almost the length of a luncheon fork, whereas snail forks have two long tines which are usually around 2/5ths the length of the utensil, which itself is about 1/2 to 2/3rds the length of a teaspoon or salad fork. Mind you, the noted dimensions are "in general." The actual sizes and designs will vary by the manufacturer.

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Anecdotal Aside:
When my wife was selecting the various trinkets and whatnots she'd register for our wedding, I had one of the most ridiculous challenges I'd faced up to that point in our relationship: finding a way to offer input about which firm's flatware "we" should register. She liked "Brand A's" design a better, but "Brand B" offered a far wider assortment of supplemental pieces, such as joint forks (used for carving sucking pig and large boned roasts -- the two tines are very widely separated to skewer the flesh on either side of the bone, thus providing optimal control when carving), matching platters, tea services, samovars, children's food pushers, etc. "Brand B" also offered a bespoke service, which mean discontinuance of the pattern wouldn't ever be an issue.​
She: Which pattern do you like better?
I: I like "Brand A" better.
She: Yeah, me too. But what if we don't get all the pieces we register for? It could be a while before we can complete the service.
I: Well, if that happens, we'll just have to make do.
She: Oh, that's fine when everything's handed-antique silver, but we're buying new.
I: I guess you have a point. Better go with "Brand B." Hey, why not just go with a custom design of your own?
She: I can't ask "Aunt Bea" to give us custom silver.
I: What? "Aunt Bea" is going to give us silver for our wedding? Why are you even registering for it? Just tell her what you want.
She: "We" have to register so she can have choices, but she's already said she wants to give us our silver.
I: Well, shouldn't you be having this conversation with Aunt Bea instead of me? It's not that I don't care, but, I don't think I care as much as you and she. I just wanna eat with utensils. You want to eat with utensils having a particular pattern and function, and it seems like "Aunt Bea" understands how that goes, and I don't. So why don't we go down the street and get dinner, and when we return you call her and figure out which one to go with? Either that or we order pizza or Chinese, and you can call her now. I just know I'm now in the mood to use flatware instead of talk about it.​


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