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My girlfriend for 40 years ago

Lord of Planar

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?
 

justabubba

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if you have not agreed to be 'exclusive' to any of these women, there is only one way your circumstance could be viewed as 'sticky' ... and don't want to hear about that
 

Lord of Planar

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if you have not agreed to be 'exclusive' to any of these women, there is only one way your circumstance could be viewed as 'sticky' ... and don't want to hear about that

LOL...

the one girl is a relationship that started October 2011. When we started getting more than just casual, she informed me of her plans in progress to move. She has lived now in Phoenix since November 2011, but stays at my place when she visits family here. We haven't spoken about others, but I'm sure she is on the same sheet of music that we are not exclusive. It has never come up that we are exclusive, and quite frankly, I can't see myself as always waiting for her, or her for me.

I was just hoping for some thoughts on the issue regarding a relationship so long ago. I most certainly don't expect her to be as I remember, and hope she doesn't think the 40 years changed me either. I re,ember her as this tall dark haired beauty with hair below her ass. talking to her, she says she never cut it, until last year when she got cancer and needed Chemotherapy. She said it made four wigs for others.

I'm a woos in some ways. There is another woman who I dated, and a couple years ago I said I didn't think I could cope with her child. She has an autistic son. I'm actually in a state of mind that I'm worried about her future health, should I decide I like her again.

Besides, I'm very healthy for my age, and have only dated women in the 30's, and some in their 20's over the last several years. They have no idea I'm as old as I am until i tell them.

The girl in Phoenix just turned 37.
 

Mason66

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

Why would you feel guilty about seeing an old friend from 40 years ago?
 

lpast

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

No thoughts just I hope it works out and you have a great time
 

Lord of Planar

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No thoughts just I hope it works out and you have a great time

Thank-You.

This is one of the weirdest moments of my life though. I am so apprehensive over seeing my first love, after 40 years.
 

joG

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

Have fun, but don't do anything i wouldn't do.
 

Winchester

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LOL...

the one girl is a relationship that started October 2011. When we started getting more than just casual, she informed me of her plans in progress to move. She has lived now in Phoenix since November 2011, but stays at my place when she visits family here. We haven't spoken about others, but I'm sure she is on the same sheet of music that we are not exclusive. It has never come up that we are exclusive, and quite frankly, I can't see myself as always waiting for her, or her for me.


The girl in Phoenix just turned 37.

Damn... why screw up a good thing. :lol: Get to live by yourself most of the time with occasional booty calls with a younger woman.
 

Lord of Planar

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Damn... why screw up a good thing. :lol: Get to live by yourself most of the time with occasional booty calls with a younger woman.

Yep.

One reason for the apprehension...
 

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

It sounds like trouble , run ! :lamo
 

Helix

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

well, what do you feel? i am engaged to a girl i dated briefly in 1997, reconnected with in 2008, and began officially dating again in 2013. i'm very glad i turned around while walking home that night and managed to randomly meet her in the alley during her class reunion.
 

lpast

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Thank-You.

This is one of the weirdest moments of my life though. I am so apprehensive over seeing my first love, after 40 years.


Bah just go for it be a gentlemen and not overly rambunctious and enjoy yourself
 

Lord of Planar

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well, what do you feel? i am engaged to a girl i dated briefly in 1997, reconnected with in 2008, and began officially dating again in 2013. i'm very glad i turned around while walking home that night and managed to randomly meet her in the alley during her class reunion.

I don't know what or how I feel yet. I really liked her those 40 years ago, but I wasn't as ready as she was to commit to anything. I try to dismiss the notion of regret, because then I wouldn't have the life or children that I do now. One of my fears is that I will regret breaking up with her 40 years ago, and then I will feel guilty of knowing I wouldn't have the same children.

I know, it's silly, but random thoughts are silly at times.
 

Lord of Planar

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Bah just go for it be a gentlemen and not overly rambunctious and enjoy yourself

Yes, we will see each other. We already agreed on that. It just seems weird to me.
 

Beaudreaux

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

Easier said than done, but, put the old emotions out of your mind. Go to the date and get to know your old flame all over again. I'm sure she's changed in 40 years, and you have as well. That's where you start the conversation and discussing 40 years for both of you (two lifetimes) will take up all the time. Try not to reminisce about when you two were an item, way back when. Get to know her again like it's a blind date, and she may catch on and do the same with you. Make it fun. Other than your past relationship, you both have a foundation to build upon - all the people you both know from your past, how so-and-so is so rich and no one would have guessed he'd turn out that way, and of course, there's always the guy and gal that were in the popular crowd that came out of the closet.

Just have fun. You have a unique opportunity to create a brand new relationship with an old friend. If you guys hit it off again, and the sparks begin to fly, well... but for now, don't go into it looking for fireworks, just fun and friendship. If it turns out to be more, it will be even better if it happens organically.

JMHO - from a guy that's celebrating 30 years of marriage plus 6.5 years of dating before that, all with the same woman - I lucked out, so take my advice with a grain of salt since I'm not nor have ever been in your situation.
 

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

Who initiated her divorce? A woman that initiates a divorce except because of criminal activity is a bad risk.
 

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wishing you luck

it's a bizarre situation, I get that

a few months ago, I was out of town at a hospital appointment for me with my man

I saw someone that looked vaguely familiar but I didn't look closely as he wasn't in my line of sight and I dismissed it

later, in another room he approached me and he was an old friend from 25 years ago, I had always wondered if we could have worked out

when I saw him, the years fell away and there was a feeling of instant comfort

I have not allowed myself to contact him, not yet anyway

it is a surreal feeling...prepare yourself to transport back into your past and feel an uncanny sense of comfort and peace...it's unnerving

let us know what happens
 

Glen Contrarian

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

I see nothing wrong with going for it. Why not?
 

code1211

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OK, in 1976, I had a girlfriend that I haven't spoken to in 40 years. She was my first. We didn't break up on bad terms, and she married my friend two years later. She divorced two years ago, and reached out to me last year on classmates dot com. I saw and responded to her message two weeks ago, We have talked on the phone twice now, for a total of two hours. this is a wired situation. We will likely go out next week (later this week) for dinner. I have never had such mixed feelings in my life, over a date. I haven't shared this yet with too many people as I am already involved in a long distance relationship with one woman, and really like a coworker...

Sticky situations.

Any thoughts?

I have many, but the primary ones revolve around the background the two of your share.

There are really no secrets and no explanations needed in this kind of a get together. Everything you are was pretty much baked in when you knew each other.

I have a very few old friends who I treasure. Presented with this opportunity, I would grab it with both hands and hold on tight.

It sounds as if you might feel some loyalties to the women you mention. You will need to be the judge of that for yourself.

Still, when you look into the eyes of a friend of years ago, the years fall away and the love shines through time.

Go for it. This is an opportunity that very few are presented.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wg4VJZTq8vU
 

VanceMack

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I'm certain that after telling your current girlfriend all about it there wont be a problem with you meeting the woman for lunch.
 
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