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Mom Again

I think I'm getting pretty settled with mom. Her diuretics went haywire ten days ago, but she seems stable. She's scheduled to go to an adult daycare center once a week starting tomorrow. She's got Medicare provided oxygen, a hospital bed and, shortly, a custom-fitted wheelchair and superior cushion to protect against pressure point sores.

Tom is going to take her weekly to her adult daycare center -- her "social club," as I call it. I'm paying him $60 per round-trip to make it fair to him, and still save, probably $60 a trip compared to a Medivan.

She's done with her physical and occupational therapy. Getting a little bit stronger each week. Now that the in-home nursing/therapy is finished up, I've hired one of the professional care-givers on the side to give her a weekly sponge bath or shower.

She has lymphodema in her right arm from a mastectomy she had done 30 years ago, and I've ordered a "trough" for her wheelchair (which has arrived) and a slanted foam 'pillow' that fits into it to allow her to permanently raise her arm on her wheelchair to help drain the fluid (backordered).

I ordered her a snazzy lunchbox with accessories from Amazon yesterday so she can take her lunch to the social club. She can't eat their food because she's on a low/no-salt diet, so I'll be sending her with one. Roasted a turkey breast today for a turkey sandwich and salad lunch to pack for tomorrow.

I've learned to ignore her complaining. For now. And am working through her late-night wake-up calls and early morning desire to get up for the day...

Tomorrow's a free day for me (the social club). Tomorrow night, Tom will make sure he's home so I can go to a GNO Wine Tasting. And Sunday, we have a caregiver coming so we can spend the afternoon and evening with his sister and family.

All's right with the world. For today. Ha! I'm a happy girl.
 
In addition to learning how to ignore the little things that would normally upset us, the one thing caregivers learn is that time is our most precious possession. You can't save it, but you can lose it. What counts is how you spend it, when it's free.
 
sangha;bt2756 said:
In addition to learning how to ignore the little things that would normally upset us, the one thing caregivers learn is that time is our most precious possession. You can't save it, but you can lose it. What counts is how you spend it, when it's free.

Very true, Sangha.
 
Glad to see you're getting into a routine. The initial stages of such a dramatic life change are the hardest and most depressing, at least that's what I found. Getting all the details ironed out and working with multiple people/agencies can be really draining and the rest of your life doesn't just stop while all this is happening. Once you get past that first part, you don't coast but you get pretty comfortable with it.

From what you've said, it reminds me to be respectful of those who work in healthcare and are charged with getting all these details worked out for people who don't have anyone to do it for them or who are in facilities on a pretty permanent basis. It helps appreciate why they sometimes seem distant and unaffected by the patients around them - all that work and responsibility dulls them sometimes to the personal toll it takes.

Good luck and have fun at the wine tasting and on the family get together - try to compartmentalize and forget you have a mom to care for while you're out of the house so you can come back refreshed and ready for more screaming at the wall!!
 
Hey MaggieD- one thing you might want to check into for her is a lymphedema sleeve, which is a "sleeve" which slips on like a glove, and is made of a compressive-type stretchy material. That may alleviate the need for frequent elevation.
 
lizzie;bt2759 said:
Hey MaggieD- one thing you might want to check into for her is a lymphedema sleeve, which is a "sleeve" which slips on like a glove, and is made of a compressive-type stretchy material. That may alleviate the need for frequent elevation.

Lizzie, I'm going to get a stretchy one (but not the iron maiden kind) when she gets the elevation form. Twenty years ago or so, she had the massage therapy done to completely normalize her arm. She was custom-fitted for (what I call) the iron maiden kind and wore it religiously every day. At night, she put on her bionic man velcro contraption to sleep in. Every night wrapped her hand and fingers, put on that God-awful thingie. But that stopped a few years ago.

At the nursing home, they elevated her arm and used what I think you're referring to. I should start looking for it. Thank you for the reminder!! I'll check right now.
 
I got the elevation form and a "stretchy". Can't get her to keep her arm on it. Becomes just one more thing for me to nag her about. Ha. I think I'm giving it up. The light stretchy works, though, even how light it is. 'Course it just moves the fluid from one place to another, but maybe it gives her more mobility in her arm.
 
MaggieD;bt2779 said:
I got the elevation form and a "stretchy". Can't get her to keep her arm on it. Becomes just one more thing for me to nag her about. Ha. I think I'm giving it up. The light stretchy works, though, even how light it is. 'Course it just moves the fluid from one place to another, but maybe it gives her more mobility in her arm.

Hi Maggie - you might want to get a medical opinion on this. I know with my mom, the doctors always said nothing tight, no tight bandages, etc. because she had blood flow issues and you could end up causing damage/death or tissue/nerves that weren't getting sufficient blood and oxygen.
 
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