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Military Memes and Jokes

Fishking said:
For anyone not Army S1 is our admin section.

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No shit, I almost didn't get to out process on my last day of active duty because my BDE S-1 hadn't processed my leave from almost 9 months earlier, so my official leave amount according to the Army and according to the BDE didn't match, which would have meant I didn't have enough leave for my Terminal Leave.

And this was with me scheduled to start college the following Monday.
 
Questerr said:
No shit, I almost didn't get to out process on my last day of active duty because my BDE S-1 hadn't processed my leave from almost 9 months earlier, so my official leave amount according to the Army and according to the BDE didn't match, which would have meant I didn't have enough leave for my Terminal Leave.

And this was with me scheduled to start college the following Monday.
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Sounds about right. I simply cannot figure out why this is such a common thing across the military (at least the Army anyways). It would seem that there would be some shitty S1s and some good S1s, just depending on the unit and command climate but it's like no matter where you go there are problems.
 
Fishking said:
Sounds about right. I simply cannot figure out why this is such a common thing across the military (at least the Army anyways). It would seem that there would be some shitty S1s and some good S1s, just depending on the unit and command climate but it's like no matter where you go there are problems.
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Commands have so much leeway in tacking on unnecessary bureaucratic bullshit for S1 tasks. My BN in Germany required more paperwork for my PCS leave than the US Army HQ did for my Declination Statement right before I got out.
 
Questerr said:
Commands have so much leeway in tacking on unnecessary bureaucratic bullshit for S1 tasks. My BN in Germany required more paperwork for my PCS leave than the US Army HQ did for my Declination Statement right before I got out.
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😬😬😬

Where were you in Germany?
 
Fishking said:
Anyone got some headlight fluid or a box of grid squares?

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Go feed the shaft seals. Bring back a bucket of steam and some elbow grease.

Also, make sure to get your ID 10 Tango signed. It's an important form.

For nonukes on a carrier, "have you sent up the request chit to get your radiation shield?".
 
roguenuke said:
Go feed the shaft seals. Bring back a bucket of steam and some elbow grease.

Also, make sure to get your ID 10 Tango signed. It's an important form.

For nonukes on a carrier, "have you sent up the request chit to get your radiation shield?".
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Or is that an ID10 Tangmo form?
 
roguenuke said:
Go feed the shaft seals. Bring back a bucket of steam and some elbow grease.

Also, make sure to get your ID 10 Tango signed. It's an important form.

For nonukes on a carrier, "have you sent up the request chit to get your radiation shield?".
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Get on over to the Dispensary double time cause they're expecting you to pick up a dozen fallopian tubes.
 
In the late 8th century, the Danes regularly defeated the English, despite having fewer numbers and inferior weapons and armor. Some say it is because an Englishman must learn to become a warrior, whereas a Viking is Björn a warrior.
 
Nomad4Ever said:
The entire US Army Esports team is a meme.
iu
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Why in the goddamned **** would the military have esports teams
 
Deuce said:
Why in the goddamned **** would the military have esports teams
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Recruiting obviously. Their target demographic is 16-20ish year olds.
 
Nomad4Ever said:
Recruiting obviously. Their target demographic is 16-20ish year olds.
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"How do you do fellow kids" at its finest. I'm highly skeptical that it helps recruitment.
 
I was out processing in late 1975. I had my folder with all my appointments and a countdown chart until ETS. I had about six days left and had fulfilled all my appointments for that week. I headed back to the gf’s home, six hours away. The next morning I answered the phone and it was my battalion SGM. I was instructed to bring my ass back to post in the most expeditious manner possible and report to his office. SGM had me by the nuts and I had to listen to a raft of shit, but he let me slide…….
 
PirateMk1 said:
145. I should not drink three quarts of blue food coloring before a urine test. I have no doubts whatsoever that some brilliant malcontent did that very thing. That is one I can well and truly visualize happening and the reactions it would have engendered. Some funny ass shit there. My brother tells many stories of his times as infantry, and I have many myself from working in, with, and around many countries militaries. Most of which should not told in public.
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I never saw people drink food coloring before a piss test, actually I might have, but I do very well remember the four loko bs, where if enough was drinken they would piss and crap blue or green or whatever color the drink was. It was really funny watching the forget the name for it think it was upl scream about people putting cool aid in the urine cups and doing it over.
 
StillBallin75 said:
Knew a corporal who made his private knock on his Stryker for an hour with a mallet and hammer looking for "weak spots" in the armor lmao
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Can't knock on any armor with a hammer anymore, sopme of the abrahms have reactive armor and many humvees had those short lived explosive bolts designed to fling the doors off so soldiers could escape rather than being pinned in after an ied attack.

Point being using a hammer to look for soft spots now a days might get someone killed, while handing them a trashbag to collect exhaust samples or sending them to look for a box of ohms will not.
 
Questerr said:
No shit, I almost didn't get to out process on my last day of active duty because my BDE S-1 hadn't processed my leave from almost 9 months earlier, so my official leave amount according to the Army and according to the BDE didn't match, which would have meant I didn't have enough leave for my Terminal Leave.

And this was with me scheduled to start college the following Monday.
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For me I did not use my leave days for terminal leave, I sold them. But the unit was moving to el paso, with those left behind as transitional. The major who was the transitional commander of the leftover brigade who was not moving refused to sign my leave pay, always excuses and fought until the end, he did not want me to take any leave and did not want me to cash out those days for money, he wanted me to re enlist and ship to el paso like everyone else since I would have had zero say over duty station or mos, and the army arleady signaled where I would go regardless of mos.

I finally got it signed before leaving 4id and transitioning to the national guard, it took me being persistant and complaining to 3 corps who ran fort hood to make something happen.
 
Deuce said:
Why in the goddamned **** would the military have esports teams
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Why would the military have any sports teams? Same reason. I do not see where the problem is for some that the military has esports.

Also note that gaming has been an important part of the military since forever. Running game simulations has been around, and is important to developing strategy in advance of battle, since at least WW2.
 
Redress said:
Why would the military have any sports teams? Same reason. I do not see where the problem is for some that the military has esports.

Also note that gaming has been an important part of the military since forever. Running game simulations has been around, and is important to developing strategy in advance of battle, since at least WW2.
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Wargaming, sure, you could maaybe make an argument for first person shooters, but League of Legends?
 
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