• This is a political forum that is non-biased/non-partisan and treats every person's position on topics equally. This debate forum is not aligned to any political party. In today's politics, many ideas are split between and even within all the political parties. Often we find ourselves agreeing on one platform but some topics break our mold. We are here to discuss them in a civil political debate. If this is your first visit to our political forums, be sure to check out the RULES. Registering for debate politics is necessary before posting. Register today to participate - it's free!

Joke page Political or just funny put them here.

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
Mrs. Johnny has just returned from New York City and
is having refreshments at the Local Pub with her southern girl friends.
She tells them the stories of her trip as they stare spellbound.
"You just wouldn't believe what they have there in New York City," says Mrs. Johnny.
"They have men there who kiss other men on the lips."
Mrs. Lil Johnny's friends fan themselves and say, "Oh my! Oh my!"
"They call them homosexuals," proclaims Mrs. Lil Johnny.
"Oh my! Oh my," proclaim Her girl friends an they fan themselves lots more !
"They also have women there in New York City who kiss other women on the lips!"
"Oh my! Oh my," exclaim Her girl friends ! "What do they call them?" they scream?
"They call them lesbians," says Mrs. Lil Johnny.
"They also have men who kiss women between the legs, there in New York City,"
an Mrs. Lil Johnny breathes deeply and sighs loudly !
"Oh my! Oh my! Oh my," scream her girl friends sitting on the edge of their chairs and fanning themselves much faster.
"What do they call them?" they ask in unison.
Well; Lil Mrs. Johnny leans forward and says real quick in a hush,
"When I caught my breath, I called him Precious.
 

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
A well known womanizer with a long list of conquests walked
into his neighborhood local and ordered a drink.
The bartender thought he looked worried and asked him if anything was wrong.
"I'm scared out of my mind," the stud replied.
"Some cheesed-off husband Named Lil Johnny, wrote to me and
said he'd kill me if I didn't stop screwing his wife."
"So stop," the barkeep said.
"I can't," the womanizer replied, taking a long swill.
"The idiot didn't sign his Last Name!"
 

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
What is Rectal Pain ?

Walked with the Grandson out to the yard and says, "lets pick up some Sticks "
Grandson replies, "why" .... twhs ... and stands there and watches me pick up the Sticks.
Rectal pain intensifies !

"I replied, "you like to ride your Bicycle ?" ... twis
"Time passes faster when you don't think about it" .... twis
"why" ... twhs
..... ! even more rectal pain ! twit ! ....

I'm in the Corner Mini Mart and tons of people in there.
I say to the guy at the Check out,
"This seems the Busiest corner in town "
"I bet time passes real fast for ya" ... twis
"Why" ... twhs ...
Why ? WTS ! ...twit ..... ! Even more rectal Pain ! ......(y)
 
Last edited:

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
Lil Johnny has now worked in a pickle factory as a Career.
He had been employed there for many years
when he came home one day to confess to his wife
that he had a terrible compulsion.
He had an urge to stick his ***** into the pickle slicer.
His wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist
to talk about it, but Lil Johnny's stubbornness overwhelms him
And Lil Johnny says, "I will be too embarrassed, it's just too embarrassing."
He vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own.
One day a few weeks later, Lil Johnny comes home and
his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong.
"What's wrong, Lil Johnny ?," she asked.
"Do you remember that I told you
I had this tremendous urge to put my ***** into the pickle slicer?"
"Oh, Lil Johnny, you didn't!" she Yelled !
"Yes, I did," he replied.
"My God, Lil Johnny, what happened?" she asked.
"I got fired," he replied.
"No, Lil Johnny, " I mean, what happened with the pickle slicer?" she demanded.
"Oh... she got fired too."
 

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
Our Hero walks into a bar,
orders a 32 oz. brew,
the lady bartender serves a cold draw and
our hero says to the Lady Bartender,
" I ain't had a good pee in six weeks ! "
 

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
One day Phill hears his wife scream,
"I'm having labor pains!" So Phill rushes his wife over to the hospital.
As the doctors were prepping his wife Phill's brother Bill arrived at the hospital.
Bill is a little slow in the head if you know what I mean and
seems to always bother Phill.
So when the doctor called Phill in to watch the birth he walked in with pride!
But when he saw the blood and everything else, he fainted.
When Phill woke up he was in a bed and saw the doctor standing above him.
The doctor said, "Phill, you are in the recovery room.
Don't worry, your wife is fine and she had twins."
Phill became tremendously happy.
The doctor also said, "They are a boy and a girl!"
Phill became immensely happy!! The doctor continued,
"Although you were unconscious your wife requested,
your brother Bill name the kids."
Phill screamed, "What! My brother the idiot!
I can't believe you let him! What did he name them!?"
The doctor replied, " he named your daughter Denice "
Phill answered, "Hey not bad! I underestimated my brother.
Well what did he name my son?"
The doctor answered solemnly,
"He named your son, Denephew."
 

Manc Skipper

Wrinkly member
DP Veteran
Joined
Jan 25, 2008
Messages
37,058
Reaction score
25,956
Location
Southern England
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Slightly Liberal
This Father's Day we're letting all dads indulge their favourite hobby: sitting in a dark room and gazing wistfully into the middle-distance.
 

P_T

Retired and satisfied
DP Veteran
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
1,722
Reaction score
195
Location
mid-west
Gender
Male
Political Leaning
Moderate
Lil Johnnys wife says, "I have feeling too !"
So; Lil Johnny is immediately touched by
his Wifes tender thoughts and asks,
"Can you bring me a Dude Wipe from the hall closet?"
 
Top Bottom