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RAMOSS

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Ten signs you might be at a Republican Seder

10. They refuse to answer the Four Questions without a subpoena.
9. They demand a recount of the ten plagues.
8. They defend not increasing the minimum wage on the grounds that according to Chad Gadya, it still costs only two zuzzim to buy a goat.
7. The afikomen is hidden in the Cayman Islands.
6. They refuse to open the door for Elijah until they see his immigration papers.
5. They attack Moses for negotiating a deal with Pharoah because "why would we negotiate with our enemies?"
4. They don’t understand why the Egyptians didn’t cure the plagues with hydroxychoroquine.
3. They omit the parts about slavery from the Haggadah because they remind them of Critical Race Theory.
2. They keep asking, “when do we get to the miracle of the Jewish space lasers?”

and the number one sign that you might be at a Republican seder…

1. They end the seder by singing “Next Year in Mar-a-Lago.”
 

P_T

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THE GAMES

What's going to happen to all those thumbs in 20 - 30 years, what will they be doing ? ...
coolgleamA.gif


Will the outcome of all the games be stored somewhere on something ? A Cloud of All knowledge !

ARE there going to be any games left to play with all having been played, what will the thumbs have to do ?

Will the Thumb become useless ? Maybe the thumb will unite with the first finger to form 0's

Parents may have it done at birth to save the Childs Futures ! You know give the Thumbs something to do ?
 

P_T

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Ever since we got married,
my wife has tried to change me.
She got me to stop drinking, smoking and
running around until all hours of the night.
She taught me how to dress well,
enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking,
classical music, even how to invest in the stock market."
"Sounds like you may be bitter
because she changed you so drastically," remarked his friend.
"I'm not bitter. Now that I'm so improved,
she just isn't good enough for me," said Lil Johnny
 

P_T

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Gilbert Gottfried passed this past week. Never liked him ! ......:cool:
 

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P_T

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Three guys die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: Don't step on the ducks!"
So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one.
Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest woman he has ever seen. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to the ugly woman!"
The next day, the second guy steps accidentally on a duck, and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing, and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first guy.
The third guy has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he has ever laid eyes on: a very tall, tan, curvaceous, sexy blonde. St. Peter chains them together without saying a word.
The guy remarks, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?"
She says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"
 

P_T

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Scientists at Rolls Royce builds a pneumatic gun specifically to launch dead chickens
at the windshields of airliners and military jets all travelling at maximum velocity.
The idea was to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions
with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.
American engineers hear about the gun and
are eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains.
Arrangements are made, and a gun was sent to the American engineers.
When the gun is fired, the engineers are shocked as the chicken hurled out of the barrel,
crashes into the shatterproof shield, smashes it to smithereens,
blasts through the control console, snaps the engineer's back-rest in two and
embeds itself in the back wall of the cabin like an arrow shot from a bow..
The horrified engineers send Rolls Royce the disastrous results of the experiment,
along with the designs of the windshield and begs the British scientists for suggestions.
Rolls Royce responds with a one-line memo:
Defrost the chicken..
 

Manc Skipper

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The Guru cartoon reminds me of the man who spent years searching for one, and having finally found him, asks
"Master, what is the secret of true happiness"? The guru thinks and replies
"My son, the secret of true happiness is to agree with anything anyone ever says to you!" Despairing at the wasted years, the man rages
"No! No! It can't be that!" and the guru replies:
"All right then, it isn't!"
 
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Manc Skipper

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I had a terrible childhood. I was very young when I was born. I cried like a baby!
 

P_T

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"Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas," Lil Johnny says
to his uncle when he sees him after the holidays.
"It's the best present I ever got."
"That's great," said his uncle.
"Do you know how to play it, Lil Johnny ?"
"Oh, I don't play it," Lil Johnny says, "My mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and
my dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night."
 

P_T

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1651643541696.pngBoys n Girls do it !
Birds n Bee's do it ! So what's the big deal here !
 
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