Is rape all about power and never about sex?

[herenow]

The theory is that rape is all about power. Do you believe this and why? I know in some instances such as serial rapists, and sadists it is, but I don't believe it's always about power.

 

[Voidwar]

No, I don't.

Psychologists project motives onto people they cannot relate to.

 

[rivrrat]

It's both.

Serial rapists are not doing it to "get laid". They are doing it because they wish to dominate, control, and humiliate the victim. It is always, in some sense, about sex even if it is mostly about control and power. If it wasn't about sex *at all*, then the attacker wouldn't be turned on.

But, don't mistake the sadist for a power/domination person. Those are two different things. The sadist takes pleasure in causing someone else pain. The dominant individual, however, takes pleasure in having complete control of someone else. While they certainly can coincide, they are two distinct personality traits.

Date rapists who drug their victims are, IMO, more likely to be doing it for sex as there is no real domination/power involved. I know of no Dom who thinks that an unconscious person is actually being dominated. A Dom would take no pleasure from doing anything to an unconscious person.

 

[herenow]

Thanks. I was beginning to think I was the only one that felt that way. Like all crimes, all rapes are different and all motives are different. Just always been a pet peeve of mine when someone chimes in with the cliche "it's not about sex but about power".

 

[rivrrat]

Thanks. I was beginning to think I was the only one that felt that way. Like all crimes, all rapes are different and all motives are different. Just always been a pet peeve of mine when someone chimes in with the cliche "it's not about sex but about power".

It often is about power, but sex does at least have *something* to do with it. But for the "serial rapist", it's not so much about sex... otherwise, he'd give the victim the opportunity to CHOOSE to have sex with him, no? That's why I think date rapes have more to do with sex than power, since many times the woman was given the opportunity to have sex.

But a serial rapist would reject the woman who gave herself willingly. It wouldn't be a turn on for him.

So, IMO, it depends on the rapist. I would venture to guess (and that's mostly what it is) that most rapes are about power, with the sex/turn on being an underlying current. But some are about sex with the power being an underlying current.

 

[CaptainCourtesy]

Rape is about sex only in the type of violence that it is. It is an assault an is more about loss of privacy and about control. Sex is a means towards these things.

 

[FallingPianos]

your sex drive would have to be so high that you could be considered disabled in order to legitimately say that you raped someone because you couldn't control your sex drive.

some rapists rape their victims because they can, and because they don't care about or respect their victims. others do it because totally dominating another person and/or causing them pain gives them pleasure.

 

[Voidwar]

I wonder if Captain and Star have interviewed lots of rapists.

I wonder if they might rather be . . .

projecting motives onto people they cannot relate to.

 

[talloulou]

Rape instances often go up during summer when women are walking around wearing less. So I think to completely rule out sexual motivation is a bit naive.

 

[ptsdkid]

Rape instances often go up during summer when women are walking around wearing less. So I think to completely rule out sexual motivation is a bit naive.

***How right you are Talloulou. When I was a younger man I raped many women when I knew I could get away with it. I'm not saying that I would do it again today, just that the perfect scenario isn't as prevelant as it once was. Acts of rape have nothing to do with power--I just wanted to get my rocks off without having to go through the wine and dine scene, that almost always ended in a disappointing and teasing goodnight kiss. Most those acts of rape happened when I was poor and unable to pay for a high class hooker.
Btw Talloulou, could you do me a favor by changing your name to Tallyhoe or something a little easier to pronounce? I'm even having trouble spelling it. And the moderators already warned me about misspelling people's names here. Wouldn't want to see me banned from here, would you?

 

[Hatuey]

***How right you are Talloulou. When I was a younger man I raped many women when I knew I could get away with it. I'm not saying that I would do it again today, just that the perfect scenario isn't as prevelant as it once was. Acts of rape have nothing to do with power--I just wanted to get my rocks off without having to go through the wine and dine scene, that almost always ended in a disappointing and teasing goodnight kiss. Most those acts of rape happened when I was poor and unable to pay for a high class hooker.
Btw Talloulou, could you do me a favor by changing your name to Tallyhoe or something a little easier to pronounce? I'm even having trouble spelling it. And the moderators already warned me about misspelling people's names here. Wouldn't want to see me banned from here, would you?

......Ladies and Gentlemen. An Army Vet/Rapist. :memorial_

 

[Kandahar]

***How right you are Talloulou. When I was a younger man I raped many women when I knew I could get away with it. I'm not saying that I would do it again today, just that the perfect scenario isn't as prevelant as it once was. Acts of rape have nothing to do with power--I just wanted to get my rocks off without having to go through the wine and dine scene, that almost always ended in a disappointing and teasing goodnight kiss. Most those acts of rape happened when I was poor and unable to pay for a high class hooker.
Btw Talloulou, could you do me a favor by changing your name to Tallyhoe or something a little easier to pronounce? I'm even having trouble spelling it. And the moderators already warned me about misspelling people's names here. Wouldn't want to see me banned from here, would you?

Dude, you are so not a real person. This is yet another example of a ptsdkid post that crosses the line from possibly-genuine-dumbass to obviously-fake-troll.

 

[talloulou]

***How right you are Talloulou. When I was a younger man I raped many women when I knew I could get away with it. I'm not saying that I would do it again today, just that the perfect scenario isn't as prevelant as it once was. Acts of rape have nothing to do with power--I just wanted to get my rocks off without having to go through the wine and dine scene, that almost always ended in a disappointing and teasing goodnight kiss. Most those acts of rape happened when I was poor and unable to pay for a high class hooker.
Btw Talloulou, could you do me a favor by changing your name to Tallyhoe or something a little easier to pronounce? I'm even having trouble spelling it. And the moderators already warned me about misspelling people's names here. Wouldn't want to see me banned from here, would you?

What a world class piece of $hit! Since my name is beyond your mental abilities why don't you just refrain from talking to me at all in the future! I know this is the last time I will ever EVER reply to one of your posts. If any of what you have said is true KARMA is a bitch and I have no doubt you'll eventually get yours. If you are just being funny then your delivery is off. Either way from here on out I'm completely done with you. :2wave:

 

[1069]

How right you are Talloulou. When I was a younger man I raped many women when I knew I could get away with it.

Ban this fool.
Someday, he's going to post something that's going to bring the FBI down on Vauge.
Don't think it can happen?
Ever heard of Sherman Austin, twenty-year-old webmaster of the political forum "Raise the Fist"?
He served a year in federal prison, and his mother's home (which he shared) was raided by the FBI and ultimately siezed, along with all the rest of their property... because of something a troll posted on his website. How to build an incendiary device. Before Austin had a chance to delete it from his forum or ban the troll, the feds came down on him. The troll, to my knowledge, was neither sought, apprehended, nor penalized.

Hey, maybe it was ptsdkid.

 

[dragonslayer]

I believe that rape is about power and control. It is traditional in western and asians for the man to control the woman in society. These are very old cultural norms and biases. they seem to go back to Egytians, assyrians, Babylonians, and sumerians. this dominance stuff go back to early early china according to their long written history.

the womens movement that says women are intelligent, and viable beings is only from this century. yet there has been some intelligent thought about this subject in what was called the upper, royal, or ruling classes, or there would never have been Queens.

 

[ptsdkid]

What a world class piece of $hit! Since my name is beyond your mental abilities why don't you just refrain from talking to me at all in the future! I know this is the last time I will ever EVER reply to one of your posts. If any of what you have said is true KARMA is a bitch and I have no doubt you'll eventually get yours. If you are just being funny then your delivery is off. Either way from here on out I'm completely done with you. :2wave:

***Now didn't we all get to learn a lot about you in this one response? You obviously have trouble dealing with people that speak the truth (as I did with my post here). Sort of like the people believing everything that former president Bill Clinton had said. Lets remember, he didn't inhale and he didn't have sex with that woman...Monica Lewinski. My..my...what am I ever going to do now that you refuse to engage me in meaningful or playful conversation? It would help if you were to show any kind of sign of having a sense of humor. The spelling and pronunciation of your name is a problem for me as I detailed with the moderator warnings. Looks like I won't be worrying about warnings of misspelling your name anymore. Thanks for letting me off the hook.

 

[herenow]

Guess you can tell I'm the newbie..I thought they wre both joking around(hope so).


Anyway, for those who think it's about power and control only, how do you explain date rape? I could see if the date bum rushed a girl after she came in from checking her mail as to catch her off guard, but if they are on the couch in the throws of passion, and he wants to go further than she does, and she says stop, and he doesn't.....doesn't that indicate that it is indeed about sex, and his 'immediate' desires*rolleyes*

 

[Hatuey]

***Now didn't we all get to learn a lot about you in this one response? You obviously have trouble dealing with people that speak the truth (as I did with my post here). Sort of like the people believing everything that former president Bill Clinton had said. Lets remember, he didn't inhale and he didn't have sex with that woman...Monica Lewinski. My..my...what am I ever going to do now that you refuse to engage me in meaningful or playful conversation? It would help if you were to show any kind of sign of having a sense of humor. The spelling and pronunciation of your name is a problem for me as I detailed with the moderator warnings. Looks like I won't be worrying about warnings of misspelling your name anymore. Thanks for letting me off the hook.

.....you just confessed to being a serial rapist. Nothing funny or humorous about that Bub.

 

[dragonslayer]

Guess you can tell I'm the newbie..I thought they wre both joking around(hope so).


Anyway, for those who think it's about power and control only, how do you explain date rape? I could see if the date bum rushed a girl after she came in from checking her mail as to catch her off guard, but if they are on the couch in the throws of passion, and he wants to go further than she does, and she says stop, and he doesn't.....doesn't that indicate that it is indeed about sex, and his 'immediate' desires*rolleyes*

then the fact that he forces her verbally or physically to go past where she wants to go is power and control.

 

[herenow]

.....you just confessed to being a serial rapist. Nothing funny or humorous about that Bub.

Didn't he admitt to being a white nationalist too tho? Some ppl you just have to assume they are trolls.

 

[herenow]

then the fact that he forces her verbally or physically to go past where she wants to go is power and control.

Ok remove the word rape, and give it another. Let's say it's money or a tv remote. Let's say he asks for the $20.00 in her purse because he's hungry, and she says no... she wants to use it to get a manicure. His want for the $20.00(b/c he's hungry) trumps her desire to get a manicure, and he takes it as soon as she leaves the room. He took it because he has no respect for her wishes number one, but he took it because that was the ITEM he wanted at THAT moment. The 20bucks made it about MONEY not about power.

 

[talloulou]

Guess you can tell I'm the newbie..I thought they wre both joking around(hope so).

He told me he raped a bunch of women and then asked if he could add hoe to the end of my name. I usually get funny but in this case the joke was completely lost on me. :doh

 

[1069]

It does not actually surprise me, in light of your posting history since joining this forum, Herenow, that you would assume someone who admitted to being a serial rapist was "joking around".

 

[herenow]

He told me he raped a bunch of women and then asked if he could add hoe to the end of my name. I usually get funny but in this case the joke was completely lost on me. :doh

Sorry, wasn't trying to excuse him. I know trolls will push buttons and say things to get a rise out of others, so I tend to ignore outlandish comments. Only time ppl's comments anger me is if they are being for real. His statements were so out in left field it was evident(at least to me) that he was just typing to hear himself type.

 

[herenow]

It does not actually surprise me, in light of your posting history since joining this forum, Herenow, that you would assume someone who admitted to being a serial rapist was "joking around".

Read post below. I've been a part of other online forums for close to 4yrs. I can spot a troll a mile away. It was more of a 'shock' value comment, even tho he was trying to make it into a joke. He got what he intended, which was to upset others. That's their MO...

btw-What are you insinuating about my 'posting history'?