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Is it ok to spank your children?

Is it ok to spank children?

  • Yes

    Votes: 33 73.3%
  • No

    Votes: 12 26.7%

  • Total voters
    45
Originally Posted by Scarecrow Akhbar
No it's not. It depends on how it's applied and the reason for it.

Perhaps if Mssrs Harris and Klebold had been given ten lashes each, in public for their earlier crime...car theft, wasn't it?...then perhaps they'd have learned to behave....then again, maybe it should have been their parents that should have been whipped...

A lot depends on the culture, too. 500 years ago, when battles were fought face to face, would it be abuse to coddle the child and not prepare him for future conflict? That child would become meat real quick.
It is definately child abuse. No doubt about it. Maybe if parents wouldn't teach their children violence, we wouldn't have all these Manson's running around.
 
Billo_Really said:
It is definately child abuse. No doubt about it. Maybe if parents wouldn't teach their children violence, we wouldn't have all these Manson's running around.


Violence is in our genes. We're descended from killer apes. No point in pretending that violence had to be taught and that if it wasn't taught it would go away.
 
Scarecrow Akhbar said:
Violence is in our genes. We're descended from killer apes. No point in pretending that violence had to be taught and that if it wasn't taught it would go away.
Yes... It stems from all those ancient banana wars..:roll:
 
Originally Posted by Scarecrow Akhbar
Violence is in our genes. We're descended from killer apes. No point in pretending that violence had to be taught and that if it wasn't taught it would go away.
There as never been a violent baby born in the history of this planet. So your wrong, we program it in to them. Everyone that has been interviewed on death row have all said they were abused as children. If you strike your child in anger, you are a child abuser. Your also a lazy parent. Some things in life you can't do part time.
 
Hitting a child is wrong. Period. The act of spanking a child is violence. You do not gain some sort of all knowing merciful lesson by an act of violence. I still say that those parents who spank their children are poor parents, those incapable of teaching a lesson except by violence.

Yeah, great lesson, there.
 
Originally posted by Hoot:
Hitting a child is wrong. Period. The act of spanking a child is violence. You do not gain some sort of all knowing merciful lesson by an act of violence. I still say that those parents who spank their children are poor parents, those incapable of teaching a lesson except by violence.

Yeah, great lesson, there
I was beaten as a child. I resented my father so much that I practically didn't see him for 18 years until 4 hours before he passed away.
 
Billo_Really said:
There as never been a violent baby born in the history of this planet. So your wrong, we program it in to them. Everyone that has been interviewed on death row have all said they were abused as children. If you strike your child in anger, you are a child abuser. Your also a lazy parent. Some things in life you can't do part time.


No, they're not violent when they're born. First they have to learn how to walk. Then they practice with violence.
 
Hoot said:
Hitting a child is wrong. Period. The act of spanking a child is violence. You do not gain some sort of all knowing merciful lesson by an act of violence. I still say that those parents who spank their children are poor parents, those incapable of teaching a lesson except by violence.

Yeah, great lesson, there.
Hoot, there is a huge difference between abusing the child and spanking the child. If a man can tell or know the difference, then he has no business being a parent !
Spanking a child is NOT an act of violence !
So, yes, it is fine and dandy to spank the child as necessary, providing this is done in a loving manner.
Please do not think this is impossible, it is not , at least for normal people...

As a child, I had to be spanked, even hit, I bear no grudge - without this discipline, I may have ended up as a criminal..
Child abuse is a totally different matter, and it does take a highly trained intelligent case worker, or better, a doctor to recognize this..
 
Billo_Really said:
I was beaten as a child. I resented my father so much that I practically didn't see him for 18 years until 4 hours before he passed away.

I am sorry to hear that......
 
Billo_Really said:
I was beaten as a child. I resented my father so much that I practically didn't see him for 18 years until 4 hours before he passed away.

I feel your pain my friend, I was also raised with an abusive father, he was far from perfect, but he was all I had, and all I would ever have. I never had the chance to ask him why he was so angry, and frustrated. Still, I actually took comfort in his abuse, as some attention, was better then none at all, as sad as that sounds, it's life as we know it. Unfortunately you don't have to have a liscense to have children, and the child does not come with directions, so we all have to do the best we can with the cards we are dealt. I don't offer you condolences, as that will not help you at this point in your life, but don't transfer your experiences on to others, as there are good parents out there that spank their children. I always knew there was a reason we were close, now I know what that connection is about. We love you here, and that may or may not comfort you, but if it does, hold on to that feeling, we are all screwed up here, you're not alone my friend.;)
 
Deegan said:
I feel your pain my friend, I was also raised with an abusive father, he was far from perfect, but he was all I had, and all I would ever have. I never had the chance to ask him why he was so angry, and frustrated. Still, I actually took comfort in his abuse, as some attention, was better then none at all, as sad as that sounds, it's life as we know it. Unfortunately you don't have to have a liscense to have children, and the child does not come with directions, so we all have to do the best we can with the cards we are dealt. I don't offer you condolences, as that will not help you at this point in your life, but don't transfer your experiences on to others, as there are good parents out there that spank their children. I always knew there was a reason we were close, now I know what that connection is about. We love you here, and that may or may not comfort you, but if it does, hold on to that feeling, we are all screwed up here, you're not alone my friend.;)

All should read this a second time.

I too was supposedly "abused" as was my sister. Our defensive systems are quite good at protecting ourselves psychologically - all the bad is simply forgotten, and will stay that way..
Father was simply too young for children at the time - plus the pressures of having to earn a living..
I never, as I recall, never had to spank my daughter, she was simply obedient, but I had to "speak" to her at times..
 
I have three children a boy 9 and two girls 6 and 4. I do believe in spanking them, but not to the point of abusing them. I also use other methods such taking away things they love or grounding. I believe in using whatever works as long as it is leagal and non abusive. Todays parents have to be more creative and versitle in punishment then our parents did, because our children see and hear so much more then we did. Children today have more information at their fingertips, tv with 100's of channels instead of 3, internet, vidieo games, dvd's and a school system that lacks in discipline and proper education. All of this can influence them and make a parents job harder. I respect parents who do not want to spank their children, that is thier choice. Those parents who abuse thier children the leagal system should punish them although that is not an easy task to say the least. We can not punish parents who spank and do not abuse them so we get those who do.

REMEMBER The more the goverment gets involved in our personal lives the more it will get screwed up.
 
earthworm said:
Deegan said:
I feel your pain my friend, I was also raised with an abusive father, he was far from perfect, but he was all I had, and all I would ever have. I never had the chance to ask him why he was so angry, and frustrated. Still, I actually took comfort in his abuse, as some attention, was better then none at all, as sad as that sounds, it's life as we know it. Unfortunately you don't have to have a liscense to have children, and the child does not come with directions, so we all have to do the best we can with the cards we are dealt. I don't offer you condolences, as that will not help you at this point in your life, but don't transfer your experiences on to others, as there are good parents out there that spank their children. I always knew there was a reason we were close, now I know what that connection is about. We love you here, and that may or may not comfort you, but if it does, hold on to that feeling, we are all screwed up here, you're not alone my friend.;)
All should read this a second time.

I too was supposedly "abused" as was my sister. Our defensive systems are quite good at protecting ourselves psychologically - all the bad is simply forgotten, and will stay that way..
Father was simply too young for children at the time - plus the pressures of having to earn a living..
I never, as I recall, never had to spank my daughter, she was simply obedient, but I had to "speak" to her at times..
Yes... That was Great from the heart... Thanks Deeg.
 
Kandahar said:
You're saying that a few isolated incidents of sociopaths murdering fellow classmates will be stopped, if only schools are allowed to beat their students for talking during class? Could you possibly be any more irrational?

A few isolated incidents, give me a break....These are kids killing kids in schools.......That never happened when I went to school........
 
No one is denying that any kind of abuse of a child is wrong but you can spank a child without abusing them............A few swats on the butt never hurt any kid.....

Kids nowadays have no fear of their parents..........If you raise you hand to one they call DHS and the parent gets arrested........The kids know they can't be punished physically.............

Like someone said spare the rod, spoil the child........
 
Navy Pride said:
A few isolated incidents, give me a break....These are kids killing kids in schools.......That never happened when I went to school........

That is due to the discipline in effect at the time.

I was either hit or really "spoken to" (chewed out) by the history teacher as I was laughing/yakking during the recital of the pledge of allegiance. I was nor being deliberately disrespectful, but just being my usual scatter-brained self.
The class instructor , however, was not amused..
He did the right thing and will be forever respected.

Today, with so many politically correct "persons" and safety-nazis in power, things are not so good..
 
Originally posted by Deegan:
I feel your pain my friend, I was also raised with an abusive father, he was far from perfect, but he was all I had, and all I would ever have. I never had the chance to ask him why he was so angry, and frustrated. Still, I actually took comfort in his abuse, as some attention, was better then none at all, as sad as that sounds, it's life as we know it. Unfortunately you don't have to have a liscense to have children, and the child does not come with directions, so we all have to do the best we can with the cards we are dealt. I don't offer you condolences, as that will not help you at this point in your life, but don't transfer your experiences on to others, as there are good parents out there that spank their children. I always knew there was a reason we were close, now I know what that connection is about. We love you here, and that may or may not comfort you, but if it does, hold on to that feeling, we are all screwed up here, you're not alone my friend
Thank you.
 
Originally posted by Cherokee:
I am sorry to hear that......
I wished it could have been different, but that's what went down.
 
earthworm said:
So, yes, it is fine and dandy to spank the child as necessary, providing this is done in a loving manner.

"Spank the child in a loving manner?"

Isn't that one of those oxymorons...ya know, like jumbo shrimp, military intelligence?

I am also sorry to hear the personal experiences related in this forum. It can be a sad world sometimes, but the author who said spanking was better then no attention from the parent, reminds me of those abused wives who refuse to leave husbands and equate torture with some sort of sick love?!
 
Last edited:
Re: Is it OK to spank your children?

From the Hoot ...: ..."Spank the child in a loving manner?"

Isn't that one of those oxymorons...ya know, like jumbo shrimp, military intelligence?
When a child is misbehaving; the patent MUST do something !
He can try reasoning, he can present "time out".
When these do not work; when the child is successfully challenging the parents, it is time for more drastic measures.
After the parents take a "time out" - yes ! For the parents this is necessary..
The spanking can then commence; one one , with any intelligence, and with his emotions under control(this is very important) should equate this punishment with abuse..
This make no sense, actually, non-punishment for the offending child is a form of abuse !
After the spanking, which really does NOT hurt; the discussion and hugs can continue.
Soon, there is no need for any speianktings( SpellCheck defeated):rofl ...
 
Re: Is it OK to spank your children?

earthworm said:
After the spanking, which really does NOT hurt; the discussion and hugs can continue.
Maybe in a perfect world mine would not have hurt... But then neither would it have happened. Its just not necessary... I proved it over, twice now, with my own two boys.
 
Stace said:
No freaking way. There are MANY families that do not believe in spanking, period, and there is no way that the school should be allowed to undermine that.

Strongly disagree, stace
The school MUST be allow to discipline children, or the children should not even be there. The children in the school as a unit are far more important that the wishes of parents with minority views...


Spanking is done by parents who do not want to take the time and effort into being good parents.
This is but partially true.
Doing the "wrong" thing may be better than doing nothing at all..
But then, there are parents who are really too stupid to bring up children ,spanking or no spanking..
 
I can tell you just the threat of my dad taking a belt to me and my brother as children kept us out of a lot of trouble we might have gotten in to if there was no fear of corporal punishment.........
 
Hoot said:
Hitting a child is wrong. Period. The act of spanking a child is violence. You do not gain some sort of all knowing merciful lesson by an act of violence. I still say that those parents who spank their children are poor parents, those incapable of teaching a lesson except by violence.

Yeah, great lesson, there.

That is absolutely ridiculous. When you spank your child, you are simply teaching them that there are consequences for their actions. No decent human being enjoys having to spank their children. However, there are times with many kids that spanking them may be the only way to truly impress upon them something.

For example, say if you had a 5 year old child that consistently pulled away from you and ran out into the street. Now, say despite all your efforts, every time you decided to walk to the park or anywhere, that child was taking every opportunity to pull away from you and run out into the street. At that point, it may well be a good idea to, as they say where I am from, wear that child out. Time outs, and all this new age crap does not work on every kid out there. Some kids are easy, they always mind and if they don’t, they feel terrible about misbehaving after only getting a talking to about it. However, some kids are harder, and some kids may need to be spanked. If you have to regularly spank your child, then you as a parent are doing something wrong, but there are times when a kid may need to be wore out. If you have a child that does not respect you and mind you at the age of 5 or 6, then what in the world are you going to do with them at the age of 15 or 16?

The fact that people don’t discipline like that should and are not as consistent in their parenting as they should be is why you have so many brats running around these days. My wife and I have a 5 year old son and there has been a few times when we had to give him a spanking. I hate doing it, I feel terrible when I have to do it, but by God my child is going to mind me and my wife. That’s all there is to it. Moreover, he is very polite, always says yes sir and no sir or yes mam and no mam, always says thank you, and is thoughtful of others. We are constantly doing things with him. Going of day trips, hiking, canoeing, fishing, going to museums, historical sites, anything to get him outside and away from a TV. When we go out to eat, he is always well behaved and we get complements on his behavior quite often. I don’t think we are bad parents because we have spanked him. In fact, I would argue that we are better parents because that is a possible consequence to his actions.

I am my son’s friend, but first and for most, I am his parent. Your child has to respect you. In fact, the more they respect you, the closer their relationship will be to you.
 
SouthernDemocrat said:
That is absolutely ridiculous. When you spank your child, you are simply teaching them that there are consequences for their actions. No decent human being enjoys having to spank their children. However, there are times with many kids that spanking them may be the only way to truly impress upon them something.
Exactly how I feel. Taking something away from children does not work every time. Look at it this way, it`s like imposing sanctions on a government vs military action, most of the time sanctions do not work you have to take military action and spank them.
 
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