Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

[radcen]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

 

[Beaudreaux]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

I can think of another term that I could call her, that would be very accurate given her bitching about being called cute.

Calling a girl/woman cute, has nothing to do with their intellectual capability. If she thinks otherwise, then she needs to work on her self impressions, not the impressions of others.

 

[Multicam]

I can't speak for others, but whenever I call a girl "cute" I mean it in a complementary way, with nothing either offensive or demeaning connected to it. To me it's just another friendly compliment, with nothing either sexist or dirty tied to it. Just like you, I would only say it to someone I knew.

 

[humbolt]

I'd never call her cute. I couldn't get past her dickhead personality far enough to make a comment on her appearance.

 

[faithful_servant]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

I think that it's cute how she gets so offended....

 

[Medusa]

Maybe she means she wants the same admiration for her intelligence and culture.Men usually dont pay attention the personality in women or they more care about beauty ,her complaints may be about it

 

[TheGoverness]

Re: Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

How the **** would anybody find the term "cute" offensive or demeaning to them?

 

[OrphanSlug]

Just about anything can be offensive these days, all it takes is the political motivation to be offended.

 

[Fearandloathing]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

That, my friend is entirely age dependent.

Tell them that at age 3, get kissed. Tell them that at age 13, get ignored, tell them that at 30, get slapped.

Tell them that at 60, get a smile.

 

[instagramsci]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

i would think it depends on the person being called cute

i know a couple of grown women who resent being called girls more than they resent being called cute. both may be considered infantilizing

 

[joG]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

I guess, it depends on what she looks like and whether or not she can understand sarcasm.

 

[americanwoman]

I get called "cute" and it doesn't bother me, I take it as a compliment when I get called that, it's never meant to be disrespectful in my opinion.

 

[reinoe]

There's no quelling someone who's looking to be a victim. You've seen the type...

person-"Oh you look nice in that dress"
Social Justice Warrior-"Don't you harass me you male cis scum! I don't need to be objectified by you and your male dominated society! Check your privilege. We need some muscle over here!"

 

[molten_dragon]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

No, it's a compliment.

 

[ModerationNow!]

I think that what she may be trying to convey the "dumb blond" stereotype, where some people used to joke around that hot blond girls are dumb. Who knows whether she is blond or not, but apparently she thinks that good looks are synonymous with stupidity in the minds of some of the people who call her cute. I don't agree with that notion, and I don't know why she would think it. There are both intelligent as well as unintelligent people who are good looking, same story with people who may not be as attractive.

Ironically though, you'd think that an intelligent person would know better. So maybe, in her particular case, she isn't as smart as she thinks she is. But that has nothing to do with her looks! LOL.....

Besides, how would someone who doesn't even know her be able to tell whether she's smart or not? They wouldnt, which should prove to her that she should just take the compliment at face value and not read into things.

Unfortunately many people are being conditioned to be offended for illegitimate reasons these days.

 

[clownboy]

I get called "cute" and it doesn't bother me, I take it as a compliment when I get called that, it's never meant to be disrespectful in my opinion.

Yeah, but my guess is that she has been called cute before in a diminishing way. Maybe something in her home environment. Kinda like being "complimented" on being blonde, depends on how, where and when such a "compliment" is delivered.

 

[Nilly]

I'm 24, and in my age range, cute is basically the standard descriptor that can range anywhere between 'not unattractive' - 'pretty good looking' depending on how it's said and the context. Used by both girls and guys. I don't consider it offensive. It's not necessarily complimentary, and being called beautiful or gorgeous or whatever is far more of a compliment, it simply depends on the way it's said. You could say 'eh, she's cute I guess' or something similar and not really be that complimentary about it (wouldn't say that to the persons face though). So I guess it could be construed as offensive in the same way you could be offended if someone called you average or middling at something rather than good/great.

But then, not being complimentary doesn't necessarily mean you're being offensive.

 

[Skeptic Bob]

I would think that for most people it is all about context. I would consider it highly inappropriate to call someone "cute" in a professional setting. Nothing wrong with thinking it but I would verbalized it to them.

If it is a bar or club then I think most people would find it appropriate.

But no matter how careful you are you can't please everyone because everyone is different and we all exist on a bell curve.

 

[Ahlevah]

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

My stereotype of extremely attractive women is they're stuck up and narcissistic until proven otherwise. And if they're Gen Y'ers, they're spoiled brats--and dumb, too. Geez louise, are they dumb! Can't help it, but I'm more comfortable dealing with the "fat," "homely," or downright "ugly" ones because they seem to be better grounded and not so full of themselves. And more intelligent, too. Or maybe the pretty ones just act stupid. I don't know.

 

[Dragonfly]

I would think that for most people it is all about context.

This. x's 100.

There are certainly instances where telling someone they're cute could truly be a form of put-down.

Context is everything.

 

[justabubba]

This. x's 100.

There are certainly instances where telling someone they're cute could truly be a form of put-down.

Context is everything.

apologies in advance to Obama for this revised quote:

you're cute enough, hillary

but remember, this is America: land of the offended

 

[Nilly]

My stereotype of extremely attractive women is they're stuck up and narcissistic until proven otherwise. And if they're Gen Y'ers, they're spoiled brats--and dumb, too. Geez louise, are they dumb! Can't help it, but I'm more comfortable dealing with the "fat," "homely," or downright "ugly" ones because they seem to be better grounded and not so full of themselves. And more intelligent, too. Or maybe the pretty ones just act stupid. I don't know.

Sounds to me like you're intimidated by good looks.

Sure there are stuck up hot people out there but in my experience just treat them like normal human beings and they turn out to be perfectly normal.

 

[Gathomas88]

Is calling a girl "cute" offensive or demeaning?

Saw an article on Facebook a couple weeks ago (sorry, no longer can find the link), and a young 20-ish girl said she hated it when people called her "cute". She said it was demeaning because it starts her off a rung lower on the respect scale and makes her work harder just to reach the same respect level as others. Her story has stuck with me, though, and I find the question intriguing.

She did say she feels the same whether it's from men or women, and she does get it from both, though she wasn't as put off if it were from someone she has known for quite some time. Take from that what you will.

Personally, I would not say it to someone I don't know, but I will make a value judgment* based on looks just because I am a heterosexual guy and like attractive women. One's attractiveness being another's ugly, of course.

*- I do believe that ALL people make initial first impression snap judgments, on everything they encounter in life, including people, and anyone who claims not so is a liar.

She frankly needs to get the Hell over it. People call me "cute" all the damn time. I'd honestly think that kind of thing's a lot more grating for a guy than a girl.

Though... Being "cute" also just so happens to get one the attention of the opposite sex, more often than not, so I really don't see any reason for complaint either way. lol

 

[Ahlevah]

Sounds to me like you're intimidated by good looks.

Not at all. Maybe when I was in high school, but not now. Looks alone just don't impress me anymore. Now, looks coupled with an intelligent, outgoing, accomplished woman? That's impressive, and if she's intimidating it's more because of her intelligence coupled with her looks than her looks alone.

Sure there are stuck up hot people out there but in my experience just treat them like normal human beings and they turn out to be perfectly normal.

Just seems that if they have it they know it and flaunt it, especially, as I said, the dumb ones. They score a big, fat ZERO with me.

 

[RetiredUSN]

I would never tell a lady that she was pretty during office hours.....ever. Especially alone!

I have been out with the crowd and told ladies among us that they looked very pretty, but only in the presence of others.

In the Navy, you had to really tip toe with comments because of leadership positions.

When I worked in Real Estate, some of the ladies actually expected those comments, especially during a office after hours team meet up at some local beach bar.