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Intervention

Has anyone watched the show called, "Intervention"?

For me, it's a very frustrating show to watch. If you've never seen it, it's a program that focuses on a person with some kind of drug addiction. Whether that drug addiction is illegal substances, prescription drugs or alcohol... it focuses on the family and friends of the addicted person as they try to set up an intervention to get the person the help they so desperately need.

It's hard for me to watch sometimes, because a member of my family has had extensive experience with drugs and alcohol. My younger brother started drinking to excess at around age 15 and has almost killed himself by overdosing, twice.

The family is often times put through hell - torn between wanting desperately to help the person and wanting to throw their hands up in the air and move on with their lives. It ruins many lives .... not only the person who has the addiction, but the people that have to also 'live' with the addiction.

The show often focuses on the persons' self destruction and the family's ongoing struggle with what they do and what they feel they should be doing in order to 'help' the person.

What's so maddening about dealing with a person with an addiction - is that they are so closed off to how their actions affect those around them.

I'm watching an episode now where the addict keeps saying, "I am not hurting anyone... what's the big deal?"

My own brother has muttered those words.

For my own family... my parents blamed themselves for my brother's addiction and my brother... blamed anyone that had any interaction with him for his drinking. We went through a roller coaster of him coming clean... only to hear months later that he 'fell off the wagon'. I hate to say it, but I had given up on him. I felt I had to, for it was affecting my life... the lives of my children and .... it just hurt too much to continue to ride the roller coaster with him.

Now, he's been clean and sober for about seven years now, and I see him a couple of times a year - every year. It's hard because I want to get to know him again, but my self preservation mode is such that I only get so close.

I lost my little brother years ago.. and don't know how to get back to that place where we once were.


www.interventiontv.com
 
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I watch the show when I can. I find it really hard to feel sorry for the addict. I do feel for the families though. It's not that you gave up on your brother. If you had, you wouldn't still be talking to him and wanting to be close again. He just burned you too many times. Nobody wants to keep putting themselves where they get hurt. Props, though, to your brother for getting clean. That must be really hard. As far as getting close to him, that'll probably take time and I honestly doubt you'll ever feel you can fully trust him. Trust is hard to earn and, once broken, harder to get back. Anyway, just my unsolicited two cents. Apologies if I've spoken out of turn here.
 
Thanks for your comment, X. Nothing out of turn here. :)
 
Excellent blog, TGND. I love the last line:

I lost my little brother years ago.. and don't know how to get back to that place where we once were.

The getting back part is so true in many ways. Mending fences is one of the hardest things to do.
 
Thanks for sharing. It is a frustrating and sad program to watch. I don't watch it much anymore. Had a coworker drink himself to despair. Unfortuntely he ended his life. Always wonder if there was something I could have done to help more. In the end I realized he made the decisions.
 
Thanks, MG. It is hard to mend fences.. especially when there is a lot of history of hurt there. Maybe some day.

mike2810 - I'm sorry to hear about your coworker. It's easy to wonder if we could have done something... but chances are, unless that person is open to the idea of helping themselves... whether that is help kicking a habit or seeking help for depression or some other mental issue - our help is most times - futile. You are 100% correct.. in the end, it's up to them. Thanks for your comment.
 
I am recently getting into the whole blogging feature, and I must say that I enjoy reading yours as I have been in similar situations. I have a younger brother of two years. We grew up being extremely close, and I lost him to drugs and alcohol. He obtained a sense of sobriety and moderation, but the damage has been done to our relationship. We hardly talk, we haven't had a meaningful conversation in years. When we were younger we used to stay in our room and talk into the hours of the morning. Now we are distant, I hardly see him, he doesn't really want me to be apart of his life. I too wonder if things will ever be restored to the place we once were too. I do pray and hope that your relationship with your brother will be mended and brought back to what it once was if not more.
 
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