I used to get thanked and responded to a lot on this forum but after doing a few minor changes to my posting habits I've been getting thanked a lot even though I continue to constantly give thanks. The gambling philosophy of "give action, get action" does not apply to social situations where commentary is the commodity in which we trade. While people can clearly see that this is a piss take and that there are many exceptions to these rules; here are some tips on how to maintain a good steady increase in number of "thanks".
-Don't put a link to your website or blog in your signature
You're "spamming" so you don't deserve getting thanked even though your signature doesn't have a bunch of smilies and a paragraph of nonsense all over it
-Watch the forum like a HAWK
Only people having an argument get passed the first page. Unless people are following your argument you are not going to get thanked once the topic gets passed page 2. Forget about getting thanked if you enter into a post later on.
-Make spry pithy concise little comments that can fit on a twitter post
People will thank you (for the bumper sticker idea). See what I did there? This tip would have fit inside of a twitter post without me explaining this nuance.
-Post common rhetoric
If you can say something that half of everyone will agree with you better say it.
An example of this is "Babies have a right to be born!!" as a response to a long essay about the ethic arguments in being pro-choice.
-Don't ask questions
Seriously, don't ask questions unless they're rhetorical and in spry twitter post form. Anonymity over the internet permits anyone to be brash no matter how uncalled for it is and people like this HATE questions because they see it as a challenge of ego more so than a challenge of reason. These kinds of questions are thankless so don't use them. People will also rightfully see these questions as a manipulation to "bait" others into appearing wrong but that's the point of a debate, no? To answer a question or series of questions that each side has a chance at in order to discover truth, yes? Sorry, even in a blog post I'm asking too many of these kinds of questions. I came to libertarianism from a conservative perspective so excuse me for pointing out implied nuances. I just want to make sure we all understand the joke.
-Express pseudo-apathy and passive-contempt
Nothing is cooler than making responses like a goth kid from south park would make. An example of this would be, "both parties are bad,.. chyeuh,.. conformists.." or "why is this news?" or "I'm just going to vote out incumbents/write in mickey mouse" as responses in almost every topic on here. Examples..
OP: The japanese bombing pearl harbor again!
Response: both parties don't know what they're talking about
OP: Congress follows San Fransico and looks into banning happy meals on a federal level
Response: why is this news when pearl harbor is being bombed?
OP: Rand Paul wins Kentucky!
Response: Vote them all out
OP: Military takes over the white house and declares that there will be no more elections ever again
Response: Vote them all out. Why is this news? Both parties are bad.
-When participating in polls, vote "other" and explain
When doing this you want your explanation to be stupid intellectual wishy washy "moderate" garbage that makes you look smart. Excuse me if I may but I honestly really cannot stand this kind of nonsense especially when "other" votes end up being an option they could have chosen from. Here's an example.
Ban happy meals. Yes or no?
Other: force parents to make good decisions instead. And only ban happy meals that have toys in them.
Now that you are armed with these tips not only will you be ranking in on thanks but you will also be ranking in on the number of posts as well. These side effects will also generate more thanks because losers like me will be attempting to affiliate themselves to you by way of thanks in order to be noticed and get thanks as well. Unfortunately, this would only work to my advantage if I followed my own advice.
-Don't put a link to your website or blog in your signature
You're "spamming" so you don't deserve getting thanked even though your signature doesn't have a bunch of smilies and a paragraph of nonsense all over it
-Watch the forum like a HAWK
Only people having an argument get passed the first page. Unless people are following your argument you are not going to get thanked once the topic gets passed page 2. Forget about getting thanked if you enter into a post later on.
-Make spry pithy concise little comments that can fit on a twitter post
People will thank you (for the bumper sticker idea). See what I did there? This tip would have fit inside of a twitter post without me explaining this nuance.
-Post common rhetoric
If you can say something that half of everyone will agree with you better say it.
An example of this is "Babies have a right to be born!!" as a response to a long essay about the ethic arguments in being pro-choice.
-Don't ask questions
Seriously, don't ask questions unless they're rhetorical and in spry twitter post form. Anonymity over the internet permits anyone to be brash no matter how uncalled for it is and people like this HATE questions because they see it as a challenge of ego more so than a challenge of reason. These kinds of questions are thankless so don't use them. People will also rightfully see these questions as a manipulation to "bait" others into appearing wrong but that's the point of a debate, no? To answer a question or series of questions that each side has a chance at in order to discover truth, yes? Sorry, even in a blog post I'm asking too many of these kinds of questions. I came to libertarianism from a conservative perspective so excuse me for pointing out implied nuances. I just want to make sure we all understand the joke.
-Express pseudo-apathy and passive-contempt
Nothing is cooler than making responses like a goth kid from south park would make. An example of this would be, "both parties are bad,.. chyeuh,.. conformists.." or "why is this news?" or "I'm just going to vote out incumbents/write in mickey mouse" as responses in almost every topic on here. Examples..
OP: The japanese bombing pearl harbor again!
Response: both parties don't know what they're talking about
OP: Congress follows San Fransico and looks into banning happy meals on a federal level
Response: why is this news when pearl harbor is being bombed?
OP: Rand Paul wins Kentucky!
Response: Vote them all out
OP: Military takes over the white house and declares that there will be no more elections ever again
Response: Vote them all out. Why is this news? Both parties are bad.
-When participating in polls, vote "other" and explain
When doing this you want your explanation to be stupid intellectual wishy washy "moderate" garbage that makes you look smart. Excuse me if I may but I honestly really cannot stand this kind of nonsense especially when "other" votes end up being an option they could have chosen from. Here's an example.
Ban happy meals. Yes or no?
Other: force parents to make good decisions instead. And only ban happy meals that have toys in them.
Now that you are armed with these tips not only will you be ranking in on thanks but you will also be ranking in on the number of posts as well. These side effects will also generate more thanks because losers like me will be attempting to affiliate themselves to you by way of thanks in order to be noticed and get thanks as well. Unfortunately, this would only work to my advantage if I followed my own advice.
