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Hillary's help: the recordings transcribed


Feb 15, 2006
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I have no idea why I wrote this... it doesn't make much sense, but I enjoyed writing it. Enjoy (if ya can)

Hillary was busy writing a blistering attack on Bush and his blizzard when she was tapped on the shoulder by an advisor...

Advisor: (whispered)"Hey.. you might want to tone it down. News is that the blizzard is going to swing north. We'll get hit, and we'll spin it, but we gotta work on this one."

Hillary: "We can't change it?"

Advisor: "It's weather, ma'am."

Hillary: "What?! I can't change it??"

Advisor: "No ma'am."

Hillary: *thinks*

Hillary: "Is it snowing in New Orleans?"

Advisor: "I'll check on that, but I'm guessing... no."

Hillary: *thinks again*

Hillary: "Okay, let's side with Bushy on this one. We can surprise a few people, but we'll gain some support from the people who can't think critically. Get Bill & George on it, pronto. And Jimmy should know."

Advisor: "Genius... right away, ma'am!" *bows*

Hillary: "Yeah, whatever. And hey..."

Advisor: "Yes?"

Hillary: "...bring me some baby powder."

Advisor: *pause* "Should I schedule an appointment, ma'am?"

Hillary: "What?? No... no. Wait," *smells finger* "Yes... make it for tuesday, please."

Advisor: "And the blizzard? Will there be any statement?"

Hillary: "Have you been listening to me? Go get my other face. I have a fundraiser in an hour."

Advisor: "The one that cracked is being modified to allow for your... specific peculiarities... the standard is ready for application, ma'am."

Hillary: "Whatever. Just get me home in time for Hannity & Colmes."

Advisor: "Yes'm"
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