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Florida Vampire to Run For President

TheNextEra

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Some tidbit quotes from the article.

"I haven't dated a girl older than 19 since 2006," said the Tampa man as his 19-year-old daughter and his 2-year-old grandson met him at the Greyhound station. "It's good to be me."
He's accused of "brainwashing" a 16-year-old in Minnesota. The two were engaged until last month. Her family now has a restraining order against Sharkey and claims his texts to her violate it.
He reportedly admitted to harassing another 16-year-old Minnesota girl online in 2009.
And last but not least...../drumroll

"He does believe in Republican values," Matthews said
:lamo:lamo:lamo
 

Groucho

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WTF?!!!!

That's the novel I'm working on now, seriously! I'm already 15,000 words into it. Have an agent interested, too.

Well, OK, the book's not exactly the same -- mine is more of a knowing satire.
 

RyrineaHaruno

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This is the best dang thing to happen, if he actually wins the nomination.
 

Groucho

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Well, there's a precedence in that we've already had a Republican vampire Vice President.
 

Gardener

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Well, I think it's refreshing that we have somebody running for office with previous experience.

Most wait to start sucking blood until after they are elected.
 

Ikari

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See, this is the problem with **** like True Blood and Sparkly Vampire Variety Show Hour or whatever that dumbass other one is. We have to recognize that vampires aren't some cool, good looking folk that we can have a relationship with. They're pure evil, the feed on the life of humans and hunt us down that their pleasure. They are demonic forces which act against us and cannot be tolerated. But thanks to fangirls everywhere, we're starting to loose our caution of vampires and some go so far as to profess some form of sick fascination of them which doesn't include killing them as quickly as possible.

Do not trust vampires...especially political vampires.
 

Catz Part Deux

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See, this is the problem with **** like True Blood and Sparkly Vampire Variety Show Hour or whatever that dumbass other one is. We have to recognize that vampires aren't some cool, good looking folk that we can have a relationship with. They're pure evil, the feed on the life of humans and hunt us down that their pleasure. They are demonic forces which act against us and cannot be tolerated. But thanks to fangirls everywhere, we're starting to loose our caution of vampires and some go so far as to profess some form of sick fascination of them which doesn't include killing them as quickly as possible.

Do not trust vampires...especially political vampires.
Vampires are so much more cunning and frightening than zombies.
 

VanceMack

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Florida Vampire to Run For President - CBS News

Lmao, He is running for a conservative position :mrgreen::mrgreen:. I am laughing so hard after reading this. :lamo:lamo:
I think he is a little bit screwy in the head.
For a vampire, he is sure aging ****ty...



Thank goodness he has a bunch of mindless gullible 16-19 year olds to exploit.

Kinda makes me want to read what his "intelligent and well thought out positions" were...kinda...ok...not really...
 

Aunt Spiker

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The funniest thing, though, is that CBS took the time to research and report.

Besides - all lawyers are vampires.
I believe the precursor of 'lawyer' has already been in the seat at the whitehouse - countless others beat the guy to it.

But I'd rather vote for Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho!! I has flare and a tasty style. I bet he could energize the country into working out every day and losing some weight.



Unlike Gotho over here - where going outside is Taboo. I think he'd head us in the wrong direction. Plus, he favors too much 'foreign stuffs' as opposed to Mountain Dew who is still quite Americanized in his beliefs - very Patriotic.

 

VanceMack

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The funniest thing, though, is that CBS took the time to research and report.

Besides - all lawyers are vampires.
I believe the precursor of 'lawyer' has already been in the seat at the whitehouse - countless others beat the guy to it.

But I'd rather vote for Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho!! I has flare and a tasty style. I bet he could energize the country into working out every day and losing some weight.



Unlike Gotho over here - where going outside is Taboo. I think he'd head us in the wrong direction. Plus, he favors too much 'foreign stuffs' as opposed to Mountain Dew who is still quite Americanized in his beliefs - very Patriotic.

Wait...is that a vampire outside in broad daylight? man...my perception of vampires is SOOO skewed. I guess I have a lot to learn...I thought they started to smoulder and burst into flames in the sunlight? I mean...shouldnt he at least have on some SPF 200 and sunglasses?

On the other hand...Im not altogether certain he would be any worse than any of our current crop of congresspersons...or past few presidents...
 

Aunt Spiker

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yeah - I know what you mean.
I like his celtic-sword garb, there. Surely it's fashionable elsewhere. . . .but he already lives in a white house.

But Mountain Dew truly has some exectutive experience and he supports torture and the death penalty.

It's hard to say
 

rivrrat

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See, this is the problem with **** like True Blood and Sparkly Vampire Variety Show Hour or whatever that dumbass other one is. We have to recognize that vampires aren't some cool, good looking folk that we can have a relationship with. They're pure evil, the feed on the life of humans and hunt us down that their pleasure. They are demonic forces which act against us and cannot be tolerated. But thanks to fangirls everywhere, we're starting to loose our caution of vampires and some go so far as to profess some form of sick fascination of them which doesn't include killing them as quickly as possible.

Do not trust vampires...especially political vampires.
Why you gotta go dissin' my porn?
 

Deuce

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See, this is the problem with **** like True Blood and Sparkly Vampire Variety Show Hour or whatever that dumbass other one is. We have to recognize that vampires aren't some cool, good looking folk that we can have a relationship with. They're pure evil, the feed on the life of humans and hunt us down that their pleasure. They are demonic forces which act against us and cannot be tolerated. But thanks to fangirls everywhere, we're starting to loose our caution of vampires and some go so far as to profess some form of sick fascination of them which doesn't include killing them as quickly as possible.

Do not trust vampires...especially political vampires.
You realize you are arguing about what is or is not the correct portrayal of a fictional monster.
 

VanceMack

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You realize you are arguing about what is or is not the correct portrayal of a fictional monster.
Believe me Im doing a face-palm as I write this...

But the dude in Florida actually believes he is an old school vampire in the manner of his 'ancestor'...Vlad the Impaler...not a convert to a bat fly around type weenie vampire but a merciless punisher belonging to the Order of Dragons...

...and he appeals to the mindles goth teeny bopper fans of the movie version...because stupid people that hate their parents and dont fit into society are easy to manipulate.
 

Aunt Spiker

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Believe me Im doing a face-palm as I write this...

But the dude in Florida actually believes he is an old school vampire in the manner of his 'ancestor'...Vlad the Impaler...not a convert to a bat fly around type weenie vampire but a merciless punisher belonging to the Order of Dragons...

...and he appeals to the mindles goth teeny bopper fans of the movie version...because stupid people that hate their parents and dont fit into society are easy to manipulate.
And they're also a minority and will grow out of it.
 

Ockham

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I have to give the guy props --- vampire's are parasites and if he's elected he's going to work with a whole bunch of other parasites... seems like a match made in heaven to me. At least he's not denying is parasited-ness... ism. Whatever.
 

Deuce

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Believe me Im doing a face-palm as I write this...

But the dude in Florida actually believes he is an old school vampire in the manner of his 'ancestor'...Vlad the Impaler...not a convert to a bat fly around type weenie vampire but a merciless punisher belonging to the Order of Dragons...

...and he appeals to the mindles goth teeny bopper fans of the movie version...because stupid people that hate their parents and dont fit into society are easy to manipulate.
We never taught this generation how to rebel properly :(
 

bicycleman

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Wait...is that a vampire outside in broad daylight? man...my perception of vampires is SOOO skewed. I guess I have a lot to learn...I thought they started to smoulder and burst into flames in the sunlight? I mean...shouldnt he at least have on some SPF 200 and sunglasses?

On the other hand...Im not altogether certain he would be any worse than any of our current crop of congresspersons...or past few presidents...
It's an overcast day.
 
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