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Feminists are not saying masculinity is toxic when they refer to toxic masculinity.


DP Veteran
Oct 29, 2016
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A lot of men feel attacked when feminists talk about toxic masculinity because they misunderstand what's being said. They're not saying masculinity is toxic; they're talking about a destructive form that masculinity can take in men. A lot of women, including feminists, love confident and masculine men. What they don't love is toxic masculinity.

What's the difference?

The way I see it is toxic masculinity comes from insecurity and weakness while healthy masculinity comes from confidence and strength. Toxic masculinity is a man dominating his wife's life because he's afraid of her developing enough autonomy to decide she wants to leave and be with somebody else. Toxic masculinity is a man constantly turning to anger because he's too insecure to express his emotions in a better way. Being a good and confident man that likes to fix cars and watch football is not toxic masculinity. Reasoned feminists are not attacking men for being men. They are attacking toxic masculinity for being destructive to men and women.

Feminism is not just for women. Do not let fringe feminists on Youtube and message boards pollute your view of an otherwise positive and good movement. They're right, and men will be a lot better off after society collectively realizes that.

Where does toxic masculinity come from?

That's probably a very long discussion. My understanding is that it is taught to many boys from a very young age. Young boys are taught to "man up" and suppress their human emotions because that's not how a man behaves. I think that causes some very serious emotional issues in men that lead to toxic masculinity and the abuse of women and other men. A lot of men have no idea how to deal with their own emotions because they've spent their life suppressing them at society's request.

Many young boys are also taught by society to objectify women. I think in general men and society don't do enough to teach young boys to value women for their intellect and emotions. Have you ever seen how a group of men often talks about women? They're talked about like they're accessories to men and sex toys. You won't often see a group of men creaming themselves over how intelligent and powerful a woman is. Young boys and young men learn from this behavior and pass it on.
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