• This is a political forum that is non-biased/non-partisan and treats every person's position on topics equally. This debate forum is not aligned to any political party. In today's politics, many ideas are split between and even within all the political parties. Often we find ourselves agreeing on one platform but some topics break our mold. We are here to discuss them in a civil political debate. If this is your first visit to our political forums, be sure to check out the RULES. Registering for debate politics is necessary before posting. Register today to participate - it's free!

Doing things by yourself

rivrrat

Goddess of Bacon
DP Veteran
Joined
Feb 26, 2007
Messages
13,988
Reaction score
6,593
Location
Charlottesville, VA
Gender
Female
Political Leaning
Undisclosed
So, I'm a bit of a loner. I require time to myself or else I go nutso and turn into the super bitch from hell. As my mom says, I "enjoy my own company". :lol:

I fully understand that other people require being around other people in order to 'have fun', or whatever. Hey, we're all different, that's what makes the world an interesting place. I do not require the presence of other people to have a good time.

The other weekend I was talking to my mother and told her I was heading up to Shenandoah National Park to go hiking to locate a remote waterfall and swimming hole I'd read about. Obviously, I was going alone. (well, with my dog) At first she said, "Sounds like fun." Then she added, "Well, actually it doesn't sound like fun to ME. I don't understand how you can have fun doing something like that by yourself". I told her the natural beauty was just a beautiful, the water was just as wet, the trail was just as fun - alone or with company. And, the whole purpose of finding this REMOTE swimming hole was to BE alone. If I just wanted to swim with a bunch of ****ing families and kids screaming, I could go to the local pool. She just said that while she knows I enjoy the pleasure of my own company, she doesn't understand it.

Am I really that odd? I go to movies alone, I go out to eat alone, I go hiking alone, I go down rivers alone (if I can, though I prefer to do that with a bud for safety reasons), I go diving alone (again, safety dictates that I do not, though), go camping alone, I go surfing/body-boarding alone. I plan and take vacations alone. When I look for trails and camping areas or swimming holes, I'm looking for someplace remote where I am less likely to actually SEE anyone else. That's not to say that I don't ever do those things with other people too, but I have no hesitations about doing them alone and often times prefer it. I can't really think of anything that I would hesitate doing alone - except for obvious safety reasons for certain things.

I was telling one of the gals I worked with about traveling to India for 6 weeks alone, though it was for work. And how one of the guys I worked with became my tourist companion and translator. But I took one weekend off to the tropical part of southern india to do some hiking and sightseeing by myself. I did not WANT him to go, even though he was very insistent that he should. My co-workers says, "My, you ARE adventurous. I would never have gone off on a weekend in some foreign country by myself, especially if I had the option of bringing a companion."

I pondered her use of the word "adventurous". I didn't consider that adventurous at all. My mom thinks I'm weird. I think everyone else is. Surely I'm not alone in the fact that I enjoy being alone? It's not that uncommon, is it?
 
I'm can be very comfortable being alone.

I don't think it's safe to do some things without a buddy though.
 
So, I'm a bit of a loner. I require time to myself or else I go nutso and turn into the super bitch from hell. As my mom says, I "enjoy my own company". :lol:

I fully understand that other people require being around other people in order to 'have fun', or whatever. Hey, we're all different, that's what makes the world an interesting place. I do not require the presence of other people to have a good time.

The other weekend I was talking to my mother and told her I was heading up to Shenandoah National Park to go hiking to locate a remote waterfall and swimming hole I'd read about. Obviously, I was going alone. (well, with my dog) At first she said, "Sounds like fun." Then she added, "Well, actually it doesn't sound like fun to ME. I don't understand how you can have fun doing something like that by yourself". I told her the natural beauty was just a beautiful, the water was just as wet, the trail was just as fun - alone or with company. And, the whole purpose of finding this REMOTE swimming hole was to BE alone. If I just wanted to swim with a bunch of ****ing families and kids screaming, I could go to the local pool. She just said that while she knows I enjoy the pleasure of my own company, she doesn't understand it.

Am I really that odd? I go to movies alone, I go out to eat alone, I go hiking alone, I go down rivers alone (if I can, though I prefer to do that with a bud for safety reasons), I go diving alone (again, safety dictates that I do not, though), go camping alone, I go surfing/body-boarding alone. I plan and take vacations alone. When I look for trails and camping areas or swimming holes, I'm looking for someplace remote where I am less likely to actually SEE anyone else. That's not to say that I don't ever do those things with other people too, but I have no hesitations about doing them alone and often times prefer it. I can't really think of anything that I would hesitate doing alone - except for obvious safety reasons for certain things.

I was telling one of the gals I worked with about traveling to India for 6 weeks alone, though it was for work. And how one of the guys I worked with became my tourist companion and translator. But I took one weekend off to the tropical part of southern india to do some hiking and sightseeing by myself. I did not WANT him to go, even though he was very insistent that he should. My co-workers says, "My, you ARE adventurous. I would never have gone off on a weekend in some foreign country by myself, especially if I had the option of bringing a companion."

I pondered her use of the word "adventurous". I didn't consider that adventurous at all. My mom thinks I'm weird. I think everyone else is. Surely I'm not alone in the fact that I enjoy being alone? It's not that uncommon, is it?

i think it was adventurous......and probably a lot of fun. you are not alone in that you like your own company. i do as well. i would say don't worry about it, but i'm sure you don't really.
 
i think it was adventurous......and probably a lot of fun. you are not alone in that you like your own company. i do as well. i would say don't worry about it, but i'm sure you don't really.

No, I don't really worry about. I am who I am. ;) I was just curious about others.
 
I would be hesitant about traveling abroad alone - but that's purely for safety reasons as you pointed about "with a bud"

But I'm just like you - while I often don't do these things alone because I do have family, I surely enjoy it. My husband and I are like this, actually. We were watching one of those "lockup" shows about people in prison - and my husband and I agreed that the idea of solitary confinement sounded surreal - like heaven. No people = no bull**** and drama.
 
I tend to masturbate while on my own, although I am willing to do it with the right kind of company as well.
 
I tend to masturbate while on my own, although I am willing to do it with the right kind of company as well.

Jergens is the company I choose.
 
No, I don't really worry about. I am who I am. ;) I was just curious about others.

i've been married 32 years.....i cherish my time alone, at least for a time. ;)
 
I'm like you, I love being on my own. I always have. I need it to remain sane. Ironically, I chose a career that forces me to be around and interact with tons of people every day. I guess it's my way of balancing things out. I love my job, but my favorite part of my day is when I get in my car and drive home finally alone again. :lol:
 
So, I'm a bit of a loner. I require time to myself or else I go nutso and turn into the super bitch from hell. As my mom says, I "enjoy my own company". :lol:

I fully understand that other people require being around other people in order to 'have fun', or whatever. Hey, we're all different, that's what makes the world an interesting place. I do not require the presence of other people to have a good time.

The other weekend I was talking to my mother and told her I was heading up to Shenandoah National Park to go hiking to locate a remote waterfall and swimming hole I'd read about. Obviously, I was going alone. (well, with my dog) At first she said, "Sounds like fun." Then she added, "Well, actually it doesn't sound like fun to ME. I don't understand how you can have fun doing something like that by yourself". I told her the natural beauty was just a beautiful, the water was just as wet, the trail was just as fun - alone or with company. And, the whole purpose of finding this REMOTE swimming hole was to BE alone. If I just wanted to swim with a bunch of ****ing families and kids screaming, I could go to the local pool. She just said that while she knows I enjoy the pleasure of my own company, she doesn't understand it.

Am I really that odd? I go to movies alone, I go out to eat alone, I go hiking alone, I go down rivers alone (if I can, though I prefer to do that with a bud for safety reasons), I go diving alone (again, safety dictates that I do not, though), go camping alone, I go surfing/body-boarding alone. I plan and take vacations alone. When I look for trails and camping areas or swimming holes, I'm looking for someplace remote where I am less likely to actually SEE anyone else. That's not to say that I don't ever do those things with other people too, but I have no hesitations about doing them alone and often times prefer it. I can't really think of anything that I would hesitate doing alone - except for obvious safety reasons for certain things.

I was telling one of the gals I worked with about traveling to India for 6 weeks alone, though it was for work. And how one of the guys I worked with became my tourist companion and translator. But I took one weekend off to the tropical part of southern india to do some hiking and sightseeing by myself. I did not WANT him to go, even though he was very insistent that he should. My co-workers says, "My, you ARE adventurous. I would never have gone off on a weekend in some foreign country by myself, especially if I had the option of bringing a companion."

I pondered her use of the word "adventurous". I didn't consider that adventurous at all. My mom thinks I'm weird. I think everyone else is. Surely I'm not alone in the fact that I enjoy being alone? It's not that uncommon, is it?


Riv, I am exactly like that. Don't get me wrong, I like people... but in limited doses. If I don't get my "alone time" I get very cranky... too long and I turn into a total grizzly bear.

I'm comfortable doing many things alone that others only do in pairs or groups. I go hiking/camping alone sometimes, even though I know the safety factor is an issue ("what if you break a leg?" my mom asks). I'm an "Adventure diner": I like to go to some exotic restaurant and order who-knows-what off the menu; if nobody is intrested in going to it with me, I go by myself.

One of the main reasons I've stayed with my current job, despite various dissatisfactions, is that for most of the day I am out alone and rarely interact with the public. I like it like that. Being stuck in an office cubical with a hundred chattering monkeys all around me all day isn't far from my personal vision of hell.

Being a single parent, I don't get as much "alone time" as I used to, but spending time with my teenage son is different than with most people. For one thing he is mostly quiet and contemplative and perfectly comfortable with long silences. For another we have similar intrests, tastes and habits. (We've been called "the clones" before, poor kid, lol.)

I require alone-time (or at least everybody-else-shut-up-time) in order to recharge my soul. At some point in my life I became aware that there were other people (strange creatures, surely from Mars or Jupiter) who actually required time among other people, preferably in a large crowd, to get that same "recharge" that I got from being alone. My initial reaction to this revelation was to wonder what planet they were from or what was wrong with them. :mrgreen:

To me, being around other people is almost always slightly tiring. However much I may like them, however familiar they may be, they have wants and expectations of some sort that they expect me to fulfill. Even my very best friends tire me out after about half a day and I'm ready to get away from them for a while.

As much as I love and dote on my son, when he goes to spend a couple of days with his mother it is like a mini-vacation for me. I am likely to deliberately avoid all unnecessary human interaction during those two days, reveling in my solitude like a cool drink on a hot day.

Now, I'm not a total hermit. After a couple of days completely alone, I start to miss my son. After a couple more days I might start to miss other close friends and immediate family. Three or four weeks alone and I'd probably be ready to talk to anyone, even someone annoying, like a salesman. :mrgreen:

But I very much get where you're coming from. There are lots of people like us (introverts), even though there are more like "them" (extroverts).

(Oddly enough for an introvert, I have "the gift of blarney" and the "silver tongue", and can play the sociable man and charm the birds out of the trees when I care to put forth the effort. It is an effort, though.)
 
I love doing things by myself, and the older I get, the more it is true. That's one of the reasons I like to garden and do small woodworking projects. I love my husband/son, other family and friends, but I love my time too. I've been a bit of a loner since my high school days, usually just having one or two really close friends that I did stuff with, but my time is valuable to me.
 
Love, love, love my time alone. Before I got married, I did most of my travelling alone. In fact, the first time I sat on a plane with someone I knew was when hubby and I eloped.
 
Ironically, I chose a career that forces me to be around and interact with tons of people every day. I guess it's my way of balancing things out.

I chose a career that forces me to interract with people on an emotional level, and I can't wait to get away from all their drama.:mrgreen:
 
First of all you need to be honest with yourself. Go to a mirror, look into your eyes and ask yourself if this is the way you want it.

You can have all the friends you want, but you have to play their game. Which means not straying too far from their conventional comfort zones.

ricksfolly
 
I chose a career that forces me to interract with people on an emotional level, and I can't wait to get away from all their drama.:mrgreen:

Every job requires interfacing with people to some extent, no man or woman is an island, You can either play the conventional game, or be a party pooper.

ricksfolly
 
First of all you need to be honest with yourself. Go to a mirror, look into your eyes and ask yourself if this is the way you want it.

You can have all the friends you want, but you have to play their game. Which means not straying too far from their conventional comfort zones.

ricksfolly

Yeah - I'm sure that's part of the reason why many of us don't like other people . . . being wrapped up with other people means you ahve to take them into consideration - you can't always be yourself.

People suck like that.
 
I'm like you, I love being on my own. I always have. I need it to remain sane. Ironically, I chose a career that forces me to be around and interact with tons of people every day. I guess it's my way of balancing things out. I love my job, but my favorite part of my day is when I get in my car and drive home finally alone again. :lol:

All intellectuals have to deal with that problem...

I shrug it of by saying or thinking to myself, Yeah, yeah, yeah, so what!!!

ricksfolly
 
So, I'm a bit of a loner. I require time to myself or else I go nutso and turn into the super bitch from hell. As my mom says, I "enjoy my own company". :lol:

I fully understand that other people require being around other people in order to 'have fun', or whatever. Hey, we're all different, that's what makes the world an interesting place. I do not require the presence of other people to have a good time.

The other weekend I was talking to my mother and told her I was heading up to Shenandoah National Park to go hiking to locate a remote waterfall and swimming hole I'd read about. Obviously, I was going alone. (well, with my dog) At first she said, "Sounds like fun." Then she added, "Well, actually it doesn't sound like fun to ME. I don't understand how you can have fun doing something like that by yourself". I told her the natural beauty was just a beautiful, the water was just as wet, the trail was just as fun - alone or with company. And, the whole purpose of finding this REMOTE swimming hole was to BE alone. If I just wanted to swim with a bunch of ****ing families and kids screaming, I could go to the local pool. She just said that while she knows I enjoy the pleasure of my own company, she doesn't understand it.

Am I really that odd? I go to movies alone, I go out to eat alone, I go hiking alone, I go down rivers alone (if I can, though I prefer to do that with a bud for safety reasons), I go diving alone (again, safety dictates that I do not, though), go camping alone, I go surfing/body-boarding alone. I plan and take vacations alone. When I look for trails and camping areas or swimming holes, I'm looking for someplace remote where I am less likely to actually SEE anyone else. That's not to say that I don't ever do those things with other people too, but I have no hesitations about doing them alone and often times prefer it. I can't really think of anything that I would hesitate doing alone - except for obvious safety reasons for certain things.

I was telling one of the gals I worked with about traveling to India for 6 weeks alone, though it was for work. And how one of the guys I worked with became my tourist companion and translator. But I took one weekend off to the tropical part of southern india to do some hiking and sightseeing by myself. I did not WANT him to go, even though he was very insistent that he should. My co-workers says, "My, you ARE adventurous. I would never have gone off on a weekend in some foreign country by myself, especially if I had the option of bringing a companion."

I pondered her use of the word "adventurous". I didn't consider that adventurous at all. My mom thinks I'm weird. I think everyone else is. Surely I'm not alone in the fact that I enjoy being alone? It's not that uncommon, is it?


I'm never alone. I've always got a book with me.
 
I'm like you, I love being on my own. I always have. I need it to remain sane. Ironically, I chose a career that forces me to be around and interact with tons of people every day. I guess it's my way of balancing things out. I love my job, but my favorite part of my day is when I get in my car and drive home finally alone again. :lol:

Same. I love being by myself.
Whether it is just indoors reading a book, playing a game or walking around a country park, I prefer it alone than with company.
 
Riv, I am exactly like that. Don't get me wrong, I like people... but in limited doses. If I don't get my "alone time" I get very cranky... too long and I turn into a total grizzly bear.

I'm comfortable doing many things alone that others only do in pairs or groups. I go hiking/camping alone sometimes, even though I know the safety factor is an issue ("what if you break a leg?" my mom asks). I'm an "Adventure diner": I like to go to some exotic restaurant and order who-knows-what off the menu; if nobody is intrested in going to it with me, I go by myself.

One of the main reasons I've stayed with my current job, despite various dissatisfactions, is that for most of the day I am out alone and rarely interact with the public. I like it like that. Being stuck in an office cubical with a hundred chattering monkeys all around me all day isn't far from my personal vision of hell.

Being a single parent, I don't get as much "alone time" as I used to, but spending time with my teenage son is different than with most people. For one thing he is mostly quiet and contemplative and perfectly comfortable with long silences. For another we have similar intrests, tastes and habits. (We've been called "the clones" before, poor kid, lol.)

I require alone-time (or at least everybody-else-shut-up-time) in order to recharge my soul. At some point in my life I became aware that there were other people (strange creatures, surely from Mars or Jupiter) who actually required time among other people, preferably in a large crowd, to get that same "recharge" that I got from being alone. My initial reaction to this revelation was to wonder what planet they were from or what was wrong with them. :mrgreen:

To me, being around other people is almost always slightly tiring. However much I may like them, however familiar they may be, they have wants and expectations of some sort that they expect me to fulfill. Even my very best friends tire me out after about half a day and I'm ready to get away from them for a while.

As much as I love and dote on my son, when he goes to spend a couple of days with his mother it is like a mini-vacation for me. I am likely to deliberately avoid all unnecessary human interaction during those two days, reveling in my solitude like a cool drink on a hot day.

Now, I'm not a total hermit. After a couple of days completely alone, I start to miss my son. After a couple more days I might start to miss other close friends and immediate family. Three or four weeks alone and I'd probably be ready to talk to anyone, even someone annoying, like a salesman. :mrgreen:

But I very much get where you're coming from. There are lots of people like us (introverts), even though there are more like "them" (extroverts).

(Oddly enough for an introvert, I have "the gift of blarney" and the "silver tongue", and can play the sociable man and charm the birds out of the trees when I care to put forth the effort. It is an effort, though.)

:yt

Finding friends that are compatible with that is difficult though.
 
So, I'm a bit of a loner. I require time to myself or else I go nutso and turn into the super bitch from hell. As my mom says, I "enjoy my own company". :lol:

I fully understand that other people require being around other people in order to 'have fun', or whatever. Hey, we're all different, that's what makes the world an interesting place. I do not require the presence of other people to have a good time.

The other weekend I was talking to my mother and told her I was heading up to Shenandoah National Park to go hiking to locate a remote waterfall and swimming hole I'd read about. Obviously, I was going alone. (well, with my dog) At first she said, "Sounds like fun." Then she added, "Well, actually it doesn't sound like fun to ME. I don't understand how you can have fun doing something like that by yourself". I told her the natural beauty was just a beautiful, the water was just as wet, the trail was just as fun - alone or with company. And, the whole purpose of finding this REMOTE swimming hole was to BE alone. If I just wanted to swim with a bunch of ****ing families and kids screaming, I could go to the local pool. She just said that while she knows I enjoy the pleasure of my own company, she doesn't understand it.

Am I really that odd? I go to movies alone, I go out to eat alone, I go hiking alone, I go down rivers alone (if I can, though I prefer to do that with a bud for safety reasons), I go diving alone (again, safety dictates that I do not, though), go camping alone, I go surfing/body-boarding alone. I plan and take vacations alone. When I look for trails and camping areas or swimming holes, I'm looking for someplace remote where I am less likely to actually SEE anyone else. That's not to say that I don't ever do those things with other people too, but I have no hesitations about doing them alone and often times prefer it. I can't really think of anything that I would hesitate doing alone - except for obvious safety reasons for certain things.

I was telling one of the gals I worked with about traveling to India for 6 weeks alone, though it was for work. And how one of the guys I worked with became my tourist companion and translator. But I took one weekend off to the tropical part of southern india to do some hiking and sightseeing by myself. I did not WANT him to go, even though he was very insistent that he should. My co-workers says, "My, you ARE adventurous. I would never have gone off on a weekend in some foreign country by myself, especially if I had the option of bringing a companion."

I pondered her use of the word "adventurous". I didn't consider that adventurous at all. My mom thinks I'm weird. I think everyone else is. Surely I'm not alone in the fact that I enjoy being alone? It's not that uncommon, is it?

Perhaps this is why you and I connect on issues that I would never think we do. I am exactly like this. People think I'm weird, also, because of it, but my preference is to be by myself. I am happy to go to eat by myself, go shopping by myself, go to the movies by myself, etc... Often when doing this, I find people-watching to be a fascination activity. Back in the day when I used to actually have time to write, I'd create stories about the people I'd see, expanding on something mundane they were doing to something outrageous or interesting. I used to be a "diner-rat". I'd eat at diners alone, a lot, get to know the waitresses, the regulars. Real interesting.

Also, with my job, I talk and am with people all day. I value my alone time, a lot.

I think it's often personality differences... introvert vs. extrovert. Has little to do with social skills, but with comfortability and preference. Extroverts are more comfortable being around people; introverts are more comfortable being alone.
 
Back
Top Bottom