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Dealing with the impossible to please

SDET

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?
 

Jetboogieman

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

Based on a lot of what you’ve said, for you, I’m guessing it’s got nothing to do with “impossible to please” and more to do with the fact that they don’t immediately get on their knees to suck your dick for a $75 cell phone.

Just a stab in the dark anyway.
 

PirateMk1

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

:lol: My secret? I dont try to please people. I dont really care if they are happy or not. If what I do makes them happy, good. If not, oh well.
 

SDET

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Based on a lot of what you’ve said, for you, I’m guessing it’s got nothing to do with “impossible to please” and more to do with the fact that they don’t immediately get on their knees to suck your dick for a $75 cell phone.

Just a stab in the dark anyway.

Take the post at face value and you will be on target. If I wanted to consider the angle you suggest, I would have said so.
 

ttwtt78640

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Hmm... why give your dog a biscuit if your dog will simply want another one later? I look at it as we both feel happy for very little cost - not that either of us wishes to take advantage of the other.
 

SDET

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Hmm... why give your dog a biscuit if your dog will simply want another one later? I look at it as we both feel happy for very little cost - not that either of us wishes to take advantage of the other.

Your dog wags his tail if he has one (some breeds don't) and is happy when you arrive home. That sounds like he is rather pleased.
 

trixare4kids

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

Because they have low self-esteem and are doormats?
As for the rest of your questions... stay away from toxic people who don't give but only take.
They'll drain the life out of you.
 

mike2810

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"But it's all right now, I learned my lesson well.
You see, ya can't please everyone, so ya got to please yourself"
RNelson

 

ttwtt78640

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Your dog wags his tail if he has one (some breeds don't) and is happy when you arrive home. That sounds like he is rather pleased.

Yep, but while we're at home he is even happier when I give him a biscuit. ;)
 

Bodhisattva

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

In my case it was not understanding that my wife had Borderline Personality Disorder while I tried to balance that craziness with being there for my children.... maybe not what you were taling about but perhaps another version of it.
 

Lursa

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

Happiness is an attitude only an (adult) individual can control. And in the end it's their responsibility to choose if they want to be happy. Or find something pleasing or not.

Are you trying to find a way to control this for others? You cant, as I just wrote, but my next question would be why? You make an honest effort (that was your responsibility if you chose to do so) and if they are not 'pleased,' then that was their responsibility to deal with it.

Pleasing individuals generally is not the objective but a means to a bigger goal...like a happy home or a stable relationship or a productive team. What's the end-game for you?
 

SDET

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Happiness is an attitude only an (adult) individual can control. And in the end it's their responsibility to choose if they want to be happy. Or find something pleasing or not.

Are you trying to find a way to control this for others? You cant, as I just wrote, but my next question would be why? You make an honest effort (that was your responsibility if you chose to do so) and if they are not 'pleased,' then that was their responsibility to deal with it.

Pleasing individuals generally is not the objective but a means to a bigger goal...like a happy home or a stable relationship or a productive team. What's the end-game for you?

The end goal: To get complaints as far away as possible and have grateful people around. For good or for ill, that kind of stuff works its way into one's subconscious and affects one's disposition.
 

Lursa

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The end goal: To get complaints as far away as possible and have grateful people around. For good or for ill, that kind of stuff works its way into one's subconscious and affects one's disposition.

Then I guess it depends on if it's at home or professional or elsewhere.

I'm not interested in having 'grateful' people around but I dont want to hear complaints. If it's professional, let them express their opinion, and then if they bring it up or act on it again, thank them for their comments and tell them to let it go. End of responding.

At home...maybe what you're delivering is really not what they want and you should examine things more from the mind-set of the other person(s).
 

maxparrish

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

When they never say thank you or compliment you for going out of your way. You either live with it or you make plans to leave that job, marriage, or situation. No point in letting the person know they are an asshole - at best you'll have momentary improvement and then a return to asshole.

My experience has been, don't fight, leave.
 

Irwin Corey

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Don't.<-period

Instead go beat your head against a wall, the headache won't be as bad and you'll get over it quicker for less money.
 

Hawkeye10

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Whether it be as a customer, observing co-workers with their boss, people with their parents (even adult children) or the man that spends himself into bankruptcy for a demanding wife, why do people put so much effort in attempting to please the impossible to please? It seems that if someone is impossible to please, that zero would be the most efficient level of effort to expend. What do you do with the impossible to please? How do you come to the conclusion that someone is impossible to please?

Just because they are not pleased with you does not mean that they dont want to have a relationship with you, and whether they are pleased with you matters to you exactly how much you decide to have it matter to you. I say you give them what you want to give them, explain to them that what they have is what they are going to get, and then leave the ball in their court. Once they decide what they want to do then you decide based upon how they are acting if this is all worth it to you, or not. If the answer is not then you leave.

Life is in large part a negotiation.
 

TheParser

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What do you do with the impossible to please?

Well, I guess that you do nothing.


For example, a certain president will never be able to please some people.

So he is quite sensibly not even trying to.

He just continues to do what he thinks is right and gains the support of some people.

As for those whom he cannot please, well, that's how the cookie crumbles.

"If you try to please everyone, you will please no one."
 
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