Cute little baby (1 Viewer)

[Topsez]

Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born
without ears. When the mother and new baby came home from the hospital
Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby.

Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a talk with him and
explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word "ears" he would get the spanking of his life when they came back home.

Little Johnny told his dad he understood completely.

When Johnny looked in the crib he said, "What a cute baby you have."

The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny."

Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes. Can he see?"

"Yes," the mother replied, "we are so thankful; the Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision. "

"That's great," said Little Johnny, "'cuz he'd be ****-outta-luck if he needed glasses

 

[Topsez]

Cute but this is funnier....

Subject: Bathroom Etiquette



The teacher asked Michael, If you were on a date, having dinner
with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to
the rest room?

"Just a minute, I have to go pee", he said.

The teacher replied,"That would be rude and impolite.

What about you Paul, how would you say it?

"I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom, I'll be right
back."

The teacher responded, "That's better, but it's still not very mannerly
to say the word 'bathroom' at the table."

"And you Johnny, are you able to use your intelligence for once and
show us your good manners."

I would say: "Darling, may I please be excused for a moment, I have to
shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope you'll get to
meet after dinner."