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Bullying is becoming epidemic

Curbing bullying would be a simple matter if schools had proper funding to implement proper changes and parents didnt have such a phobia about violence.

We need to make self-defense training a routine and required part of education, starting as young as possible. I'm a big believer in the positive force martial arts can be for people. Not only will you get kids out and moving around, you help build self-confidence and self-esteem as well as preparing them to defend themselves if necessary. Bullying works because the target doesnt feel they can or should stand up for themselves. A self-confident kid who is willing and able to defend himself is not easy prey for a bully and bullies are like any animal; they go for easy prey.
So you watched the "Karate Kid", eh?

Bully's tend to pick on the weak or those who are different because it makes them feel or look superior to others. They seldom pick on those who are their percieved equal or better. I wouldn't call that self confidence, I would call that low self esteem.
 
So you watched the "Karate Kid", eh?
No, actually I haven't.

Bully's tend to pick on the weak or those who are different because it makes them feel or look superior to others. They seldom pick on those who are their percieved equal or better. I wouldn't call that self confidence, I would call that low self esteem.
I think you mis-understood what I said. I said that self-confident kids are less likely to be picked on. Poor self-esteem is a target for bullies because a kid with those kind of problems is less likely to stand up for themselves.
 
So the schools with a "zero-tolerance" rule are barking up the wrong tree?

I think so. There is so much emphasis on bullying at school, that it's almost made it expected.

You can't protect the weak from bullies. Bullying is natural, and we all do it once in a while. I'm a pretty decent person, but if I need something for my kid, I don't care whose toes I smash. I probably learned how to be strong by being bullied by my parents. Sucks for them because it's not what they intended I'm sure, but they turned me from a little weakling into a formidable woman. Ha! Thanks Ma! :neener
 
So how are we as a nation going to combat it?

I don't believe that bullying is any worse now than it was when I was in school. Nor do I believe that suicides are more prevalent.
 
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I had 3 classmates commit suicide while I was in high school. :shrug: That was 1980-84. No one blamed bullying, we blamed depression.

I'm betting it was depression. I graduated in '76 and the only suicide was the homecoming king that nobody knew was gay.

Edited because he wasn't MY homecoming king, he was the class of '73 or '74.
 
Is bullying really any worse today than it was 10, 20, 30 years ago? or have we just raised a generation of pansies that are so fragile they can't handle it?
 
I had 3 classmates commit suicide while I was in high school. :shrug: That was 1980-84. No one blamed bullying, we blamed depression.

Depression can be a side effect of it.

When I was in 5th grade, kids tormented me for all sorts of reasons.
I got severe depression.
I went through the school psychologist weekly, tried peer mediation and the only thing that ended it for me (in some aspects) was punching a couple kids in the face.

Some other ass wipes tried to do again, in middle school and I had to fight them to get it to stop too.
 
Depression can be a side effect of it.

When I was in 5th grade, kids tormented me for all sorts of reasons.
I got severe depression.
I went through the school psychologist weekly, tried peer mediation and the only thing that ended it for me (in some aspects) was punching a couple kids in the face.

Some other ass wipes tried to do again, in middle school and I had to fight them to get it to stop too.

bingo, I was the principal's son so any time my dad got in someone's ass, they tried to come take it out on me. I think I was in some kind of altercation almost daily.
 
Stop raising wusses? :gunsmilie:

when I was a kid the saying was "sticks and stone may break my bones but words will never ****ing hurt me"
these days it's "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will leave me emotionally scarred forever"
 
bingo, I was the principal's son so any time my dad got in someone's ass, they tried to come take it out on me. I think I was in some kind of altercation almost daily.

The most common trend for my bully's was the fact that most/all their parents were room mothers or school volunteers.
The school wouldn't confront the parents about it, I think, because they were friends.

Once I set the standard that I wasn't taking their **** lying down, they backed off and even became friendly.
Although it got me suspended from school.
 
I went through the school psychologist weekly, tried peer mediation and the only thing that ended it for me (in some aspects) was punching a couple kids in the face.

One thing I'll say is that bullies operate in the shadows of zero tolerance. My son ended up punching someone in the face this year (the other kid started it). He hasn't been bullied since.

I do believe there are some situations between boys that escalate until the victim has no choice but to fight back and take whatever suspension the school dishes out.
 
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I'm 52 and don't watch the evening news. I do remember my own past, though. I do not remember any suicides from bullying. What's up with that.

Honestly? I don't think bullying has increased, I think people are babying and pampering their children more and/or just not raising them at all nowadays. I don't think the bullies have changed, I think kids these days are just too sissified (for lack of a better term).

Also, one does need to note that suicides could have been going on with just as much frequency in all the years past, but we see and hear more about these things now because of recent technology and how news is disseminated.
 
You teach kids to suck it up, confront bullies, and have a spine.

Bullying is nothing new. The weakness of today's children is the real problem.

I think that part of it is that schools (and some parents) tell kids that there is never an okay time to fight. that's b.s.

Kids get the message that fighting is never acceptable. In my book, if someone starts punching you, you are allowed to defend yourself, and as I told my son (who is not very large), if someone starts with him, he has my permission to hit that person as many times as he can (but he has to stop when the person goes down).
 
So how are we as a nation going to combat it?

I agree with Right's view - I find it hard to believe that it's *measurably worse* than before.

However - the only way to combat a wrong is by *making it wrong* - there should be more easily accesible means of reproach to bullying which involve arbitration, litigation and so forth. if something happens *through school means* it should be up to the schools to enforce the already existing rules - and bring more strict punishment on those who violate said rules.

They take parent's to truancy court when their kids don't attend school enough - so parents should be forced to get involved when their child is an asshat, as well.

If parent's and school were to be held more directly responsible for their lack of intervention and action then it would push them to act more.
 
One thing I'll say is that bullies operate in the shadows of zero tolerance. My son ended up punching someone in the face this year (the other kid started it). He hasn't been bullied since.

I do believe there are some situations between boys that escalate until the victim has no choice but to fight back and take whatever suspension the school dishes out.

Well, what I learned from those experiences was that adults didn't really care, as much as, they say they did.
Once I learned that school and the abuse was "optional" I became very disinterested in following the rules, when breaking them got me out of the place I hated.

You teach kids to suck it up, confront bullies, and have a spine.

Bullying is nothing new. The weakness of today's children is the real problem.

It's a catch 22, if you defend yourself, you get in trouble.
If you don't, you still get bullied.
It contradicts the taught philosophy of "follow the rules and you'll be respected."
 
I think that part of it is that schools (and some parents) tell kids that there is never an okay time to fight. that's b.s.

Kids get the message that fighting is never acceptable. In my book, if someone starts punching you, you are allowed to defend yourself, and as I told my son (who is not very large), if someone starts with him, he has my permission to hit that person as many times as he can (but he has to stop when the person goes down).

It was accepted fact in our household that is he did not stick up for ourselves and got our ass beaten by a bully at school without defending ourselves, we were gonna get our asses whipped again when we got home. But if we fought back, my dad would come to bat for us against any repercussions.

Kids don't have that directive anymore. Now it's all this "nothing is solved with violence, take the high road, everyone's a winner" bull****. Stop pampering the kids and the kids will toughen up.
 
Well, what I learned from those experiences was that adults didn't really care, as much as, they say they did.
Once I learned that school and the abuse was "optional" I became very disinterested in following the rules, when breaking them got me out of the place I hated.



It's a catch 22, if you defend yourself, you get in trouble.
If you don't, you still get bullied.
It contradicts the taught philosophy of "follow the rules and you'll be respected."

Depends on the type of bullying, I suppose. Not all bullying is physical. And this "emotional" bullying only works for the bullies if the one being bullied LETS it. The bullies get nothing out of it if the kid being bullied appears to not give a ****.
 
Depends on the type of bullying, I suppose. Not all bullying is physical. And this "emotional" bullying only works for the bullies if the one being bullied LETS it. The bullies get nothing out of it if the kid being bullied appears to not give a ****.

Not always easy for emotionally undeveloped kids.
I think a good punch in the face is warranted.
 
Kids don't have that directive anymore. Now it's all this "nothing is solved with violence, take the high road, everyone's a winner" bull****. Stop pampering the kids and the kids will toughen up.

we are PCing ourselves into oblivion


Violence has resolved more conflicts than any other factor. The contrary opinion that violence doesn't solve anything is merely wishful thinking at its worst.
 
Depends on the type of bullying, I suppose. Not all bullying is physical. And this "emotional" bullying only works for the bullies if the one being bullied LETS it. The bullies get nothing out of it if the kid being bullied appears to not give a ****.
As a parent, I just can't wait for that to happen to my little girl. I don't know what to tell her other than to counter it with positive actions at home.
 
As a parent, I just can't wait for that to happen to my little girl. I don't know what to tell her other than to counter it with positive actions at home.

Kill them with kindness. Seriously. Tell her not to get upset with the "mean girls", but rather to smile at them with pity. They can only hurt you if you LET them. Foster her self-confidence and she *wont'* let them.
 
Kill them with kindness. Seriously. Tell her not to get upset with the "mean girls", but rather to smile at them with pity. They can only hurt you if you LET them. Foster her self-confidence and she *wont'* let them.
Okay, cool. That's kinda what I'm doing now. I always give her a compliment on the way to and from school, and if she does a good job on her homework I tell her how smart she is, etc. We'll see how this turns out. Fortunately she's still at the age where she will confide in me if anyone at school is giving her ****.
 
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