Are religious beliefs important when looking for a partner?

[Angel]

Are religious beliefs important when looking for a partner?

That depends on what one is looking for in a partner.

 

[Lucian Hodoboc]

Of course they are. I'm essentially agnostic. I wouldn't care if someone else was religious as long as they didn't bother me with it.

You go to church on Sunday. I'll go for my morning run then get out my vape pen, than you very much. And no grace at the table!

From your post, I conclude you're more of an atheist than an agnostic. An agnostic believes that there is no possible way to prove or disprove God's existence, but doesn't deny the possibility that (a) God might exist. According to said line of thought, one would profit more from gambling on God's existence, according to Pascal's Wager. I never understood why agnostics don't act religiously just in case God exists.

 

[AK Conservative]

It works until you have children and they don't know what to believe.

 

[ataraxia]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

I think it depends on how important those beliefs are for you or your potential spouse, as well as their families. If everyone is pretty easy-going on it, I have seen it work pretty well. But if it's really really important to one or especially to both sides, then sure, it can be a source of much conflict.

 

[Sampson Simpson]

I know for a fact I would not work with a religious person, because I'm sure they don't want to hear that I think their beliefs are completely ridiculous and fictional. I don't really respect belief in religion. A spiritual, or belief in some higher power is one thing, believing completely ridiculous and made up religion is another.

 

[ataraxia]

From your post, I conclude you're more of an atheist than an agnostic. An agnostic believes that there is no possible way to prove or disprove God's existence, but doesn't deny the possibility that (a) God might exist. According to said line of thought, one would profit more from gambling on God's existence, according to Pascal's Wager. I never understood why agnostics don't act religiously just in case God exists.

Because then maybe only the Shinto gods are the real ones. You can't live like that.

 

[ataraxia]

I know for a fact I would not work with a religious person, because I'm sure they don't want to hear that I think their beliefs are completely ridiculous and fictional. I don't really respect belief in religion. A spiritual, or belief in some higher power is one thing, believing completely ridiculous and made up religion is another.

I don't know. I'm pretty atheist, and yet I really liked this Lutheran girl once. She was very nice person. It didn't work out at the end, but not because of religious reasons. I could have seen it working out, because I'm not all THAT serious, and she was pretty easy going on the religious stuff too.

 

[Rumpel]

Are religious beliefs important when looking for a partner?

They may be important for some - but not for me.

 

[KatDonovan]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

My parents shuffled us kids to many churches, many variations of Protestant churches, during my youth, and I am certain there are a few of those churches I'd never attend again. The holy roller church, for example. So, yes . . . Religious beliefs are important to me. Now, if I were dating someone and things were terrific, I would possibly convert within the boundaries of the Protestant denomination if . . . and this is a BIG IF . . . I didn't have to deal with any of the holier than thou churchgoer nonsense or holy roller situations or fasting or extremely archaic beliefs.

Now, your questions about people in different religions . . . I think it would need to be addressed on a case-by-case basis. I think factors such as how religious a person is determines the success rate of those relationships.

 

[MamboDervish]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

I think it's very easy to fool oneself if there is a very strong attraction between two people. They might convince themselves that they can tolerate another person's superstitions, but somewhere along the line a religious person will have expectations that cannot be met - and that will open up a rift between them. If a person with religion can really go through life without certain expectations of their partner, then it might work out. But the odds are against it.

 

[tosca1]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

Some religious people are progressives in their beliefs. They can be open to compromises.
But, if changes occur with how they regard their religion - that can become problematic.

Imho, having the same belief is definitely a must in a marriage.
A marriage is a team work. You've got to be looking and rowing towards the same direction, with the same goal in mind.
What more when you have children. If the couple are both religious, there are lots of rooms for contentions if you don't have the
same religious beliefs.
With denominations - it depends on what the differences are in their beliefs.

 

[EMNofSeattle]

If you are actually serious about your faith then it is a must. My girlfriend and I are both super Catholic and it’s a great thing to be able to pray the rosary together and go to mass and confession together. It gives our relationship a supernatural element to it that I could never share with a non believer.

 

[Luce]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

My wife is Catholic and it's never bothered me. I even did the make-believe conversion thing so we could have the Catholic wedding she wanted.

It's not like the priest was fooled, but all the boxes were checked off and that's what mattered.

 

[nota bene]

My wife is Catholic and it's never bothered me. I even did the make-believe conversion thing so we could have the Catholic wedding she wanted.

It's not like the priest was fooled, but all the boxes were checked off and that's what mattered.

And you're comfortable with "make-believe conversion"?

 

[EMNofSeattle]

And you're comfortable with "make-believe conversion"?

The more important question is “is she” I doubt she’s terribly invested in the faith if she accepted this.

I can’t imagine wanting to marry someone who won’t say the rosary with me and believe in it.

 

[nota bene]

The more important question is “is she” I doubt she’s terribly invested in the faith if she accepted this.

I can’t imagine wanting to marry someone who won’t say the rosary with me and believe in it.

I don't understand the pretense. You surely wouldn't want somebody pretending to go along and then bragging about only going through the motions.

 

[EMNofSeattle]

I don't understand the pretense. You surely wouldn't want somebody pretending to go along and then bragging about only going through the motions.

My parents were married in the Catholic Church and left shortly there after. My father was only recently confirmed into the church and that was only after I had become an active member. I was never raised in the religion I had to choose it myself. In many cases people want to marry in a church because it seems like the right thing to do or for cultural reasons, or because they have older and more traditional relatives who think that’s a good thing to do.If you were baptized in the Catholic Church the church will take your money and marry you. They don’t send inquisitors to ensure you’re praying your rosary every night .

 

[AmNat]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you? Would you date someone you liked and got along well with if they adhered to a different religion and were pretty obvious about trying to convert you? Do you think a relationship would work if the partners were believers, but belonged to different religions (e.g. Christian and Buddhist) or different denominations of the same religion (e.g. Orthodox and Protestant)?

It would be hell to be married to someone with a different values than oneself. Of course, many people with secular values nominally identify with a religion, and such identification is unlikely to be an issue when marrying another person with similar secular values.

A marriage between a nihilist and a person with values (secular or religious) could "work", though I suspect it would be draining to the person with values.

 

[Checkerboard Strangler]

I tried dating a girl who came from a very religious background.
Impossible.

 

[Luce]

And you're comfortable with "make-believe conversion"?

Yes. More importantly, so was my wife.

Dumb rules exist to be gamed.

 

[ataraxia]

Yes. More importantly, so was my wife.

Dumb rules exist to be gamed.

Yes. Ivanka has converted to Judaism to marry Jared. Does anyone think this has anything to do with deep contemplation of philosophical and ideological beliefs?

 

[Luce]

Yes. Ivanka has converted to Judaism to marry Jared. Does anyone think this has anything to do with deep contemplation of philosophical and ideological beliefs?

All I'm saying is that if my wife wanted the big, fancy wedding, that's what she was getting. If one cost of that was a few weeks of going through the motions, that's what I was going to do.

 

[noonereal]

When you start dating someone with the goal of establishing a long-term relationship that might lead to marriage, how important are their religious beliefs for you?

I always ask someone about their religious affiliations before dating them.
The last thing I want is to get tangled up with some religious nut case.
I could care less what faith they are a part of as long as they are secular.

Sure, a union can work with members from two different religion. When people are desperate, they are willing to compromise.
A heathy human would not put themselves through that.

 

[noonereal]

Yes. Ivanka has converted to Judaism to marry Jared. Does anyone think this has anything to do with deep contemplation of philosophical and ideological beliefs?

lololololol

 

[bongsaway]

Yes. I would prefer someone with no religious beliefs.