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13 Of The Dumbest Customer Complaints Of All Time

While working as a freight broker I had a load picking up in Arizona being delivered in Pennsylvania. The woman that worked dispatch for the carrier who contracted the load calls me up with a very hateful attitude and calls me a liar and a con and that she was calling the police.

When I asked her why she was so upset she said that the truck driver hauling the load called her and said the load was going to be far more miles then I had in our contract and I was ripping them off! That unless I payed more she was calling the police.

When I asked her where her driver was at currently she said, "hes in Minnesota"....
 
The customer is always right.

even when they're insane.


A phrase I wish had NEVER made its way into the business culture.


The customer is very clearly NOT always right. The customer may literally be insane. The customer may lie or try to scam you. The customer may request illegal goods or services. The customer may threaten or assault employees with no justification.

Even if the customer is just being a royal jackass, I'd reserve the right to tell him to take his business elsewhere if dealing with him is more trouble than it is worth. (And some of you KNOW, the 10% of customers who give you maybe 5% of your profits are the ones who create 90% of the headaches! Fire 'em!)
 
While getting my grad degree, I worked as a lab instructor for freshman chemistry labs. The very first experiment is "Identifying substances by physical properties". Students are given two samples. One liquid and one solid and are required to perform a series of tests to ID their "unknowns". Actually had a kid come up holding both of his test tubes and ask me, "which one is the liquid and which one is the solid".
 
I liked the swimming one myself
 
Friend of mine is a car salesman. A lady got in his face once because he refused to allow her to take a car for a test drive. she called him a racist and said it was "just because she was black". He very politely corrected her and said "No, it's because you don't have a drivers license"
 
Several years ago I was managing a furniture store in Boise. We had a customer return a TV cart they bought 2 days before. I refunded their money but the guy insisted that he also get paid interest for "his money that we had used". I was a little surprised but asked how much interest he figured we would have made. He said "at least $5".

I explained to him that even if we took his $39 and, instead of paying for product, shipping and payroll, had invested the whole amount at 50% we would have made roughly a dime....which I took out of my pocket and handed to him for his generosity.
 
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Friend of mine is a car salesman. A lady got in his face once because he refused to allow her to take a car for a test drive. she called him a racist and said it was "just because she was black". He very politely corrected her and said "No, it's because you don't have a drivers license"

So what you're saying is, he wouldn't let her take the car for a test drive because she was black. :lol:
 
This works in reverse. One time I was at a restaurant with a few friends that were Jewish and, for ****s and giggles, I asked the server if the Bacon Cheeseburger on the menu was Kosher. Before I could stop her, she said "Oh, I don't know. I'll go check." and ran off to ask her manager. A few minutes later she returned to the table and gave me the "I'm going to spit in your food" look so I apologized and didn't order anything.
 
So what you're saying is, he wouldn't let her take the car for a test drive because she was black. :lol:

no, he accused her of not having a driver's license because she was black :lol:
 
The customer is always right.

even when they're insane.

No not really, but when I was working in a position in which "the customer is always right" I spit in their free food..

Condescending ****s looking for free **** always got that from me....
 
No not really, but when I was working in a position in which "the customer is always right" I spit in their free food..

Condescending ****s looking for free **** always got that from me....
Did you really?

Then you're an asshole of the highest order. You're a low-life deserving of no respect whatsoever.
 
Did you really?

Then you're an asshole of the highest order. You're a low-life deserving of no respect whatsoever.

If someone is trying to rip me off and insult MY ficking intelligence I'm going to **** them right back...

This bozo **** happened 10-years-ago , however I would do the same today....

People would eat half their meal and claimed it sucks but would want a replacement meal.... Really? if it sucked then why the **** would someone want more?????????????????

Not to mention treating me like I was some ****ing idiot......

They were lucky all they got was my DNA in their **** food...
 
The only one I don't agree with is the gas station one.

At over $4 a gallon, the person running a gas station should be willing to do anything to keep you coming back. I don't care if the customer is asking you to blow them, you do it.
 
This works in reverse. One time I was at a restaurant with a few friends that were Jewish and, for ****s and giggles, I asked the server if the Bacon Cheeseburger on the menu was Kosher. Before I could stop her, she said "Oh, I don't know. I'll go check." and ran off to ask her manager. A few minutes later she returned to the table and gave me the "I'm going to spit in your food" look so I apologized and didn't order anything.

Kosher bacon is the best!
 
The lady who whined about a large for the size of a medium is probably my favorite. How dense can you be?
 
When I worked at Dairy Queen, a lady ordered a crispy chicken salad. She paid for it, got it, went out to her car and then came back in. She said it didn't have enough chicken on it. I told her that it comes with 3 chicken strips cut up, but if she wanted more we could totally do that for 75 cents for each extra piece of chicken. She got SO mad ranting about having to pay more and then threw the salad at us and walked out. So she paid for the salad that she threw all over the floor. What a maroon!
 
This week, 2 minutes after close, I gave an impatient woman a wine box, assuming she wanted to throw her plastic TGI Fridays monstrosities into the box with the bag or two of ice. I took the dividers out, gave it to her. She looks disappointed, and says she wants one with the divider. I put it back it. Displeased with the dividers not touching the walls of the box, she gave me a sarcastic but loud, "Are you kidding me?!" Not much caring, I give her another box beside it, when she asks "will it fit 1.75?" Yes, it will. All you do is push the each square aside and you can fit all you want in the box. Yes, it's made specifically to hold 12 750 ml wine bottles, but who cares?

Not satisfied with this late night, free request fulfilled, she grumbles, and yanks the box hard out of my hands and leaves huffing and puffing. She shows up 2 minutes before we're supposed to leave, and wants a complimentary box, which we are under no obligation to provide, and she gets whiny about the dividers for her plastic bottles?
 
The only one I don't agree with is the gas station one.

At over $4 a gallon, the person running a gas station should be willing to do anything to keep you coming back. I don't care if the customer is asking you to blow them, you do it.

Like hell, it isn't the gas station owner's fault that gas costs what it costs. The fact that this moron has to keep driving around is what's going to bring them back.
 
People like this is why I'm firmly convinced there needs to be a bag limit on stupid people. You can shoot up to 5 stupid people per day but you have to be able to justify your kills.

All of those losers would be gone on day one.
 
Like hell, it isn't the gas station owner's fault that gas costs what it costs. The fact that this moron has to keep driving around is what's going to bring them back.

It was just a joke.
 
A phrase I wish had NEVER made its way into the business culture.


The customer is very clearly NOT always right. The customer may literally be insane. The customer may lie or try to scam you. The customer may request illegal goods or services. The customer may threaten or assault employees with no justification.

Even if the customer is just being a royal jackass, I'd reserve the right to tell him to take his business elsewhere if dealing with him is more trouble than it is worth. (And some of you KNOW, the 10% of customers who give you maybe 5% of your profits are the ones who create 90% of the headaches! Fire 'em!)

The saying is more about customer service attitude than truth.
 
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