’m a Couples Therapist. For more and more...patients, the ideas behind Black Lives Matter and #MeToo are leading to breakthroughs at home.

[j brown's body]

"...recent events have reshaped the national conversation on power, privilege, gender norms, whiteness and systemic racism. Together these ideas have pushed us to think, talk, argue and become aware of the many implicit biases we all carry about our identities, unconscious assumptions that privilege some and inflict harm on others. These insights have also made it easier for people to realize there may be plenty of other unconscious assumptions undergirding their positions. I’ve been surprised and excited by the impact of this new understanding, and it has all made my work as a couples therapist easier.

There has, of course, been ferocious pushback against many of these ideas, claims that they are divisive or exclusionary. #MeToo, B.L.M. and trans rights have been weaponized in service of the culture wars dominating the media. But in my practice, I’ve found that engaging with these progressive movements has led to deep changes in our psyches. My patients, regardless of political affiliation, are incorporating the messages of social movements into the very structure of their being. New words make new thoughts and feelings possible. As a collective we appear to be coming around to the idea that bigger social forces run through us, animating us and pitting us against one another, whatever our conscious intentions. To invert a truism, the political is personal.

...Our ongoing national conversations about systemic biases have made it easier for couples to acknowledge wrongdoings by easing people into the idea of unconscious complicity. Accepting that you are part of a complex social system and implicated in its biases no matter what you tell yourself can also help you accept that in other aspects of your life, you are partly governed by unconscious forces you do not necessarily recognize. In Freudian terms, the ego is not a master in its own house. In other words, to know if you’ve caused harm, it is not enough to ask yourself, “Did I intend to hurt the other?”; you may need to listen to the feedback of others. These insights can have ripple effects beyond an awareness of specific biases, becoming relevant in many aspects of our lives — in our relationships with partners or children, in reviewing our life history. As my friend Nick described it: “Everything about me was raised to believe I am not racist or privileged, but in recent years I realize how easy certain things have always been for me simply because I’m white. I am humbled. And that has changed the way Rebecca and I talk with each other.”

Link

Fascinating story leading one to think that allowing the teaching of racism in schools could actually be a positiver, therapeutic thing leading to healing and understanding, not just of the other, but of oneself. Republican legislatures passing laws to prevent this teaching to protect white kids from having their feelings hurt are actually providing a disservice to them.

Of course, anyone who has confronted their racist or our racist, and misogynistic past, can vouch for this. Comforting our racist and misogynistic past in our nation's and personal history is really not any different than confronting alcoholism or drug abuse that runs in the family.

 

[Mycroft]

"...recent events have reshaped the national conversation on power, privilege, gender norms, whiteness and systemic racism. Together these ideas have pushed us to think, talk, argue and become aware of the many implicit biases we all carry about our identities, unconscious assumptions that privilege some and inflict harm on others. These insights have also made it easier for people to realize there may be plenty of other unconscious assumptions undergirding their positions. I’ve been surprised and excited by the impact of this new understanding, and it has all made my work as a couples therapist easier.

There has, of course, been ferocious pushback against many of these ideas, claims that they are divisive or exclusionary. #MeToo, B.L.M. and trans rights have been weaponized in service of the culture wars dominating the media. But in my practice, I’ve found that engaging with these progressive movements has led to deep changes in our psyches. My patients, regardless of political affiliation, are incorporating the messages of social movements into the very structure of their being. New words make new thoughts and feelings possible. As a collective we appear to be coming around to the idea that bigger social forces run through us, animating us and pitting us against one another, whatever our conscious intentions. To invert a truism, the political is personal.

...Our ongoing national conversations about systemic biases have made it easier for couples to acknowledge wrongdoings by easing people into the idea of unconscious complicity. Accepting that you are part of a complex social system and implicated in its biases no matter what you tell yourself can also help you accept that in other aspects of your life, you are partly governed by unconscious forces you do not necessarily recognize. In Freudian terms, the ego is not a master in its own house. In other words, to know if you’ve caused harm, it is not enough to ask yourself, “Did I intend to hurt the other?”; you may need to listen to the feedback of others. These insights can have ripple effects beyond an awareness of specific biases, becoming relevant in many aspects of our lives — in our relationships with partners or children, in reviewing our life history. As my friend Nick described it: “Everything about me was raised to believe I am not racist or privileged, but in recent years I realize how easy certain things have always been for me simply because I’m white. I am humbled. And that has changed the way Rebecca and I talk with each other.”

Link

Fascinating story leading one to think that allowing the teaching of racism in schools could actually be a positiver, therapeutic thing leading to healing and understanding, not just of the other, but of oneself. Republican legislatures passing laws to prevent this teaching to protect white kids from having their feelings hurt are actually providing a disservice to them.

Of course, anyone who has confronted their racist or our racist, and misogynistic past, can vouch for this. Comforting our racist and misogynistic past in our nation's and personal history is really not any different than confronting alcoholism or drug abuse that runs in the family.

Now...if that lady could just put her revelations to good use...perhaps stop people from killing each other in the big cities...this would be something that we could all give a shit about.

 

[ataraxia]

"...recent events have reshaped the national conversation on power, privilege, gender norms, whiteness and systemic racism. Together these ideas have pushed us to think, talk, argue and become aware of the many implicit biases we all carry about our identities, unconscious assumptions that privilege some and inflict harm on others. These insights have also made it easier for people to realize there may be plenty of other unconscious assumptions undergirding their positions. I’ve been surprised and excited by the impact of this new understanding, and it has all made my work as a couples therapist easier.

There has, of course, been ferocious pushback against many of these ideas, claims that they are divisive or exclusionary. #MeToo, B.L.M. and trans rights have been weaponized in service of the culture wars dominating the media. But in my practice, I’ve found that engaging with these progressive movements has led to deep changes in our psyches. My patients, regardless of political affiliation, are incorporating the messages of social movements into the very structure of their being. New words make new thoughts and feelings possible. As a collective we appear to be coming around to the idea that bigger social forces run through us, animating us and pitting us against one another, whatever our conscious intentions. To invert a truism, the political is personal.

...Our ongoing national conversations about systemic biases have made it easier for couples to acknowledge wrongdoings by easing people into the idea of unconscious complicity. Accepting that you are part of a complex social system and implicated in its biases no matter what you tell yourself can also help you accept that in other aspects of your life, you are partly governed by unconscious forces you do not necessarily recognize. In Freudian terms, the ego is not a master in its own house. In other words, to know if you’ve caused harm, it is not enough to ask yourself, “Did I intend to hurt the other?”; you may need to listen to the feedback of others. These insights can have ripple effects beyond an awareness of specific biases, becoming relevant in many aspects of our lives — in our relationships with partners or children, in reviewing our life history. As my friend Nick described it: “Everything about me was raised to believe I am not racist or privileged, but in recent years I realize how easy certain things have always been for me simply because I’m white. I am humbled. And that has changed the way Rebecca and I talk with each other.”

Link

Fascinating story leading one to think that allowing the teaching of racism in schools could actually be a positiver, therapeutic thing leading to healing and understanding, not just of the other, but of oneself. Republican legislatures passing laws to prevent this teaching to protect white kids from having their feelings hurt are actually providing a disservice to them.

Of course, anyone who has confronted their racist or our racist, and misogynistic past, can vouch for this. Comforting our racist and misogynistic past in our nation's and personal history is really not any different than confronting alcoholism or drug abuse that runs in the family.

That’s a fascinating perspective. I have to admit it surprised me a little bit. It’s interesting how things can be related in surprising and unexpected ways.

Thank you for sharing it.

 

[Crakhobarbie]

Now...if that lady could just put her revelations to good use...perhaps stop people from killing each other in the big cities...this would be something that we could all give a shit about.

Yes..... Don't burden mycroft with talk of enlightenment and emotional growth.
If it can't be beaten, bullied or eaten, he's not interested

 

[j brown's body]

Now...if that lady could just put her revelations to good use...perhaps stop people from killing each other in the big cities...this would be something that we could all give a shit about.

Whites created the poverty ridden ghettos that cause the crime.

You could benefit from this learning.

 

[Sweden]

Whites created the poverty ridden ghettos that cause the crime.

You could benefit from this learning.

We have all got the learning by now. White - very very bad. Black - victimised saints, or maybe saintly victims.

Do I get a 'pass' grade?

 

[Mycroft]

Whites created the poverty ridden ghettos that cause the crime.

You could benefit from this learning.

Who runs the big cities...whites? Or blacks.

In any case, this isn't about race so you can put away your Race Card.

 

[j brown's body]

Who runs the big cities...whites? Or blacks.

In any case, this isn't about race so you can put away your Race Card.

The ghettos were created by whites through red lining and other housing policies.

 

[Peacenik]

We have all got the learning by now. White - very very bad. Black - victimised saints, or maybe saintly victims.

Do I get a 'pass' grade?

No. Equality means equality. No race is superior or inferior. Suggest watching original Star Trek reruns. Or any of the series. Everyone is treated the same without regard to race.

 

[ataraxia]

Who runs the big cities...whites? Or blacks.

In any case, this isn't about race so you can put away your Race Card.

No it is all about that. Really.

The Source of Black Poverty Isn't Black Culture, It's American Culture

Americans don't want to imagine that our racist history is actually an ongoing, racist reality.

www.theatlantic.com

 

[Peacenik]

The ghettos were created by whites through red lining and other housing policies.

Blacks were purposely excluded from the post WWII wealth-building economy. It was a huge mistake that did severe damage to our country and has cost us trillions in lost productivity and avoidable massive incarceration.

 

[j brown's body]

Blacks were purposely excluded from the post WWII wealth-building economy. It was a huge mistake that did severe damage to our country and has cost us trillions in lost productivity and avoidable massive incarceration.

I'm teaching an 11th grade US History class this lesson right now.

I wonder if I'd be fired in a red state for teaching it.

This is, to me, about the most important lesson I teach all year, for whites and for blacks.

 

[Phys251]

"...recent events have reshaped the national conversation on power, privilege, gender norms, whiteness and systemic racism. Together these ideas have pushed us to think, talk, argue and become aware of the many implicit biases we all carry about our identities, unconscious assumptions that privilege some and inflict harm on others. These insights have also made it easier for people to realize there may be plenty of other unconscious assumptions undergirding their positions. I’ve been surprised and excited by the impact of this new understanding, and it has all made my work as a couples therapist easier.

There has, of course, been ferocious pushback against many of these ideas, claims that they are divisive or exclusionary. #MeToo, B.L.M. and trans rights have been weaponized in service of the culture wars dominating the media. But in my practice, I’ve found that engaging with these progressive movements has led to deep changes in our psyches. My patients, regardless of political affiliation, are incorporating the messages of social movements into the very structure of their being. New words make new thoughts and feelings possible. As a collective we appear to be coming around to the idea that bigger social forces run through us, animating us and pitting us against one another, whatever our conscious intentions. To invert a truism, the political is personal.

...Our ongoing national conversations about systemic biases have made it easier for couples to acknowledge wrongdoings by easing people into the idea of unconscious complicity. Accepting that you are part of a complex social system and implicated in its biases no matter what you tell yourself can also help you accept that in other aspects of your life, you are partly governed by unconscious forces you do not necessarily recognize. In Freudian terms, the ego is not a master in its own house. In other words, to know if you’ve caused harm, it is not enough to ask yourself, “Did I intend to hurt the other?”; you may need to listen to the feedback of others. These insights can have ripple effects beyond an awareness of specific biases, becoming relevant in many aspects of our lives — in our relationships with partners or children, in reviewing our life history. As my friend Nick described it: “Everything about me was raised to believe I am not racist or privileged, but in recent years I realize how easy certain things have always been for me simply because I’m white. I am humbled. And that has changed the way Rebecca and I talk with each other.”

Link

Fascinating story leading one to think that allowing the teaching of racism in schools could actually be a positiver, therapeutic thing leading to healing and understanding, not just of the other, but of oneself. Republican legislatures passing laws to prevent this teaching to protect white kids from having their feelings hurt are actually providing a disservice to them.

Of course, anyone who has confronted their racist or our racist, and misogynistic past, can vouch for this. Comforting our racist and misogynistic past in our nation's and personal history is really not any different than confronting alcoholism or drug abuse that runs in the family.

Teaching critical subjects in schools deconstructs the patriarchal notion that we are all masters of our own destiny. We are, but only to an extent. Remember how the Right vilified Obama when he correctly said that "you didn't build that"? Righties could not wrap their feeble minds around the fact that preexisting systems helped some and hurt others.

Students have the right to learn about these systems of power. As the OP mentions, this can empower those adversely affected by them.

I'm teaching an 11th grade US History class this lesson right now.

I wonder if I'd be fired in a red state for teaching it.

This is, to me, about the most important lesson I teach all year, for whites and for blacks.

Did not know you were a teacher. Thank you for what you do.

 

[Peacenik]

I'm teaching an 11th grade US History class this lesson right now.

I wonder if I'd be fired in a red state for teaching it.

This is, to me, about the most important lesson I teach all year, for whites and for blacks.

Teaching our actual history? All full of the mistakes made in the past? Give the young the knowledge they need to make America greater? Oh my. How could you? That would be a severe 'crime' in a red state. Take away the right to teach. Fire people from teaching jobs. Toss people in prison, tax the public to pay for police, courts and incarceration. Blame Democrats for the deficit.